Neil Dixon

This was ok. I bought it from my kobo ereader store because I'm doing a bit of market research on what is currently available in the indie horror market. I liked the premise, but it could have done with an edit. There was a bit of head jumping and some things in the narrative would have had a much greater impact if done by dialogue. I got a bit sick of reading 'Prichard' at the start of paragraph after paragraph at one point. Some of the expression was clunky and felt out of character, possibly because there was so little time to build character. I had an image built up in my head on one page and then something was said or described jarred with it and it pulled me from the story somewhat. I think the suspense and horror of the 'creature' could have been built up a little with more reference to backstory, nothing elaborate needed, just a few lines here or there. Likewise, the terror aspect could have been increased by focussing on the isolation of the village. I felt the author was trying to write about a tiny village where these awful things were happening but the scene was not clearly set by the mood of the piece. I didn't feel as if I was in a small village at all. There was no feeling of isolation, for instance. There were some really great descriptions of body mutilation that formed clear images in my head as I read. I could almost smell the grossness of it, which is a good thing. I think this story might get more readers with a bit of expansion and an overhaul.… (more)