Joseph D. Falcone

Okay let's face it. I am not known as a handyman. And even if I could do home maintenance on my own, without help - even if I was an able carpenter, there is something about the way that I look, or act, that would compel the nearest handyman to me to correct whatever I am doing, if it had to do with home repair.

I could drive four plyboards in perfectly, seamlessly, and some other dude would still have to say, in passing, "careful there!"

I could repair every window in my house, while cleaning the window treatments and blocking out every air leak; but if most of my male friends or family saw me from a distance, would have to offer advice on what is wrong with my caulking.

Nevertheless, this book sat in my library for ovr thirteen years. It was a wedding gift to me and my ex-wife, given to me by a cousin who, when it comes to handiwork, is probably more like me than not. His marriage failed, too, so it is safe to say that he might be helpful with the advice. Quite possible his own wife, at the time, urged him to buy this book for me.

My ex proved that women find few things more attractive in a man, than the ability to build, or fix things. When my wife told me she had filed for divorce, the most important reason seemed to be "I want a man who can take care of things." And I took that to mean, she thought that I was not good at home maintenance (despite the fact that I had painted the exterior to a 2000 square foot house, including a three-floor elevation, reparied every window, dug three different drainage fields, by hand, to manage basement flooding, turned up an acre of lawn using just a front-tine tiller, etc., etc.

No matter what I did, that image of me as a guy that cannot manage a home, stuck.

Maybe if I had gotten this book out earlier, read it, referred to it, dirtied it, my marriage might have had half a chance. My ex loved books, and perhaps the appearance of doing what she expected, was more important than the reality of it!

So then, three years after the divorce, I pulled out this book, and found it to be exceedingly useful.

It is not a book you would read cover to cover, but I do believe that it contains everything you would need to know, to do anything you might need to do, in building or repairing a house. From roofing to foundation, windows to heating, painting to hammering, flooring to paneling, it's got it all.

I is like a basic textbook, chock full of tables, standards, step-by-step instructions. But as it does cover everything (it does not, however, explain how to troubleshoot appliances), it might be advisable to consult specialized books for detail work.

But if were teaching a nine-week course on basic home maintenance, I would use this book as my text.

I'm forty-eight years old. There are thirty-nine chapters in this book. If I master one chapter a year, I could be a master handyman by the time I am ninety.

And who knows, if my ex is still unmarried by then, I might still be able to put my family back together . . . !… (more)