Terry Pratchett's hilarious take on the Faust legend stars many of the Discworld's most popular characters. Eric is the Discworld's only demonology hacker. The trouble is, he's not very good at it. All he wants is the usual three wishes: to be immortal, rule the world and have the most beautiful woman fall madly in love with him. The usual stuff. But what he gets is Rincewind, the Disc's most incompetent wizard, and Rincewind's Luggage (the world's most dangerous travel accessory) into the bargain. The outcome is an outrageous adventure that will leave Eric wishing once more - this time, quite fervently - that he'd never been born.… (more)
The bees of Death are big and black, they buzz low and somber, they keep their honey in combs of wax as white as altar candles.
No enemies had ever taken Ankh-Morpork. Well technically they had, quite often; the city welcomed free-spending barbarian invaders, but somehow the puzzled raiders found, after a few days, that they didn't own their horses any more, and within a couple of months they were just another minority group with its own graffiti and food shops.
It was true about the time measurement as well. The Tezumen had realized long ago that everything was steadily getting worse and, having a terrible little-mindedness, had developed a complex system to keep track of how much worse each succeeding day was.
- "There's a door" - "Where does it go?" - "It stays where it is, I think."
- "So we're surrounded by absolutely nothing. There's a word for it. It's what you get when there's nothing left and everything's been used up." - "Yes. I think it's called the bill."
- "What're quantum mechanics?" - "I don't know. People who repair quantums, I suppose."
- "What shall I do?" - "Well, if you see anything crawl out of the sea and try to breathe, you could try telling it not to bother."
-- Rincewind and Eric at the Beginning of Time (Terry Pratchett, Eric)
Interestingly enough, the gods of the Disc have never bothered much about judging the souls of the dead, and so people only go to hell if that's where they believe, in their deepest heart, that they deserve to go. Which they won't do if they don't know about it. This explains why it is important to shoot missionaries on sight.