Chomp

“Fresh Meat” by Victoria Janssen for Criminal Element

If you’ve never read a Carl Hiaasen novel, or heard of him at all, the first thing you should know is that his books are generally set in contemporary Florida, the author’s home. The second and more important thing you should know is that he’s one of the funniest writers around, of mysteries or otherwise, with a brilliant eye for all that’s quirky in both character and situation. His new novel is for younger readers, but I can attest it’s just as much fun for adults, and a worthy companion to Hoot, Flush, and Scat. (Those are other books he’s written for young readers that everyone should read.)

Hiaasen’s vividly satiric narrative style carries the book rapidly from point to point. Chomp opens like this:

>Mickey Cray had been out of work ever since a dead iguana fell from a palm tree and hit him on the head. The iguana, which had died during a hard freeze, was stiff as a board and weighed seven and a half pounds. Mickey’s son had measured the lifeless lizard on a fishing scale, then packed it on ice with the turtle veggies, in the cooler behind the garage.

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The difficult star of a reality television show disappears on location in the Florida Everglades where animals from the Crane family’s wildlife refuge are being filmed. Wahoo Crane and his friend Tuna set out to find the missing star, but they must avoid Tuna’s gun-happy father.

Like so many YA novels, Chomp is larded with messages. For example, are reality shows starring beefcake actors who wouldn't know their way around an alligator swam without an animal handler cheesy and deplorable? How many times do we need to be told instead of shown that Derek Badger besides having a fake name, is fat, coddled and stupid?

Still, I love Carl Hiassen's books because his cause is the Everglades. He also has the good sense to introduce an intelligent funny girl into the proceedings midway which takes the reader's mind off the redundant characterization of the chief stooge. But the most winning characters at the heart of these books, beginning with Hoot, continuing with Scat, and Flush, are the animals of Florida, including but not limited to alligators, snakes, bats, and other creatures that chomp.

Still, the humor and warm family feeling Hiaasen specializes in make this new novel a welcome addition to my list. ( )

Wahoo Cray lives in a zoo. His father is an animal wrangler, so he's grown up with all manner of gators, snakes, parrots, rats, monkeys, and snappers in his backyard. The critters, he can handle. His father is the unpredictable one.
When his dad takes a job with a reality TV show called Expedition Survival!, Wahoo figures he'll have to do a bit of wrangling himself—to keep his dad from killing Derek Badger, the show's inept and egotistical star, before the shoot is over. But the job keeps getting more complicated. Derek Badger foolishly believes his own PR and insists on using wild animals for his stunts. And Wahoo's acquired a shadow named Tuna—a girl who's sporting a shiner courtesy of her father and needs a place to hide out.
They've only been on location in the Everglades for a day before Derek gets bitten by a bat and goes missing in a storm. Search parties head out and promptly get lost themselves. And then Tuna's dad shows up with a gun . . . ( )

Grades 5-8:
When Wahoo's dad, a well-respected animal wrangler, is approached by a reality TV show to provide the animals for the show, Wahoo realizes quickly that it's going to be up to keep some diplomacy in the interactions. His dad, Mickey, doesn't suffer fools gladly, and Derek Badger, the star of Expedition Survival! is not nearly the survivalist that he likes to portray himself as. As Wahoo and Mickey prepare to accompany the crew deep into the Everglades, they pick up a classmate of Wahoo's who is running away from an abusive father. While this story does not have the ecological overtones of Hiaasen's previous YA novels, there's plenty of action, and his tongue-in-cheek portrayal of the foolishness of reality TV shows will be appreciated by his fans. Hiaasen, like Mickey, doesn't suffer fools gladly. ( )