3.5 stars

It was interesting to read their perspective of plural marriage, even though I believe polygamy is wrong.

What struck me the most throughout this book was how hard they were trying to make plural marriage out to be a good thing. They repeatedly made the assertion that participating in polygamy is how a person can truly grow to be a better, more mature person. (This reminds me of the attitude present in many Christian circles that believes marriage, in contrast to singleness, is what brings spiritual growth.) Yet despite talking it up, their actual story is one of major dysfunction and immaturity. If anything, their story should pose as a warning to anyone tempted to believe this setup might work.

I thought it was ridiculous (and hilarious) how all of these adults were quick to point out that a woman should not be pursuing a married man, and that it would be completely inappropriate for a married man to be spending time with a woman who wasn't his wife... so the most recent 3 wives don't use the term "pursue" to describe their courtships with Kody, and he adamantly denies cheating on his wife/wives. So if no one did the pursuing... how did he end up with 4 wives? Haha! Ridiculous.

Their religious beliefs struck me as very interesting, as they contrast not just to my own Christianity but, often, even to Mormonism, generally.

Kody says, "Too many people, regardless of their faith, are small-minded enough to imagine that their beliefs, their doctrines, and their rituals are the only way to be saved or to know God. I'm not self-centered enough to entertain these thoughts. In no way do I imagine that my family members are the only people who got it right.... What I'm called to do is not what you are called to do. I don't consider followers of another religion any less worthy in God's eyes or mine. I don't believe that what's appropriate for one person is necessarily appropriate for all." (p 4)

He also states, "I don't want my family to suffer for the sake of God, because if we are suffering for the sake of God in this life, we may not be happy with Him in the next one." (p 10)

He also claims that his family members will "never know loneliness again," (p 8) which just goes to show a fundamental misunderstanding of what loneliness is.

There were a lot of distracting typos, and some of the timelines were a bit confusing to follow.

I enjoyed the book for what it was - hearing someone else's opinions - but I can't give it anything more than 3.5 stars, because I feel a higher endorsement of the book serves to endorse their lifestyle, and I disagree with them too much on fundamental issues to do that. ( )

Ugh Kody! I have no issues with polygamy if that's where your religion leads you. I could not see myself with anyone like Kody even in a monogamous marriage. It's his way or the highway. He makes it a point of alway saying he includes all his wives in his decision making but ultimately it is what HE wants.

The sister wives are said to be strong women. I just didn't get that. The constant complaint of jealousy and questioning their self worth in the family was grating on my nerves. They knew what they were getting into and voluntarily went into this plural marriage knowing that Kody would have other wives so they should have had their insecurities handled beforehand. I will say that I think this whole marriage/family arraingement works because of Robyn. She seems most capable to adapt to all situations that arise and knows how to work through them involving everyone fairly.

While I don't live this lifestyle, I don't judge it either. I learned some aspects of the faith and for that I'm glad I read the book. ( )

Ugh Kody! I have no issues with polygamy if that's where your religion leads you. I could not see myself with anyone like Kody even in a monogamous marriage. It's his way or the highway. He makes it a point of alway saying he includes all his wives in his decision making but ultimately it is what HE wants.

The sister wives are said to be strong women. I just didn't get that. The constant complaint of jealousy and questioning their self worth in the family was grating on my nerves. They knew what they were getting into and voluntarily went into this plural marriage knowing that Kody would have other wives so they should have had their insecurities handled beforehand. I will say that I think this whole marriage/family arraingement works because of Robyn. She seems most capable to adapt to all situations that arise and knows how to work through them involving everyone fairly.

While I don't live this lifestyle, I don't judge it either. I learned some aspects of the faith and for that I'm glad I read the book. ( )

Ugh Kody! I have no issues with polygamy if that's where your religion leads you. I could not see myself with anyone like Kody even in a monogamous marriage. It's his way or the highway. He makes it a point of alway saying he includes all his wives in his decision making but ultimately it is what HE wants.

The sister wives are said to be strong women. I just didn't get that. The constant complaint of jealousy and questioning their self worth in the family was grating on my nerves. They knew what they were getting into and voluntarily went into this plural marriage knowing that Kody would have other wives so they should have had their insecurities handled beforehand. I will say that I think this whole marriage/family arraingement works because of Robyn. She seems most capable to adapt to all situations that arise and knows how to work through them involving everyone fairly.

While I don't live this lifestyle, I don't judge it either. I learned some aspects of the faith and for that I'm glad I read the book. ( )

I haven't watched the show in years, but back when I actually read this I did:

Well, the writing was better than I expected (yes, I'm aware they probably had a little help), the editing was crap (which seems to be the norm now but I still downgrade for it...usually).

For the most part I found it interesting, I do follow the show. The earlier chapters were of more interest than the latter as it was repetitive of what has happened on camera. Though, I have to say that I got a much different picture of Robyn in the book than on the show. I never saw any apprehension to be on the show or join the family and I certainly never saw her take a lead and teach the family better communication etc. I also never really felt any great love or respect from Janelle or Christine for Robyn. But, if you go by the book, they really appreciate her and admire certain qualities I never even knew existed.

It's not like I don't realize that you don't get a real picture of folks on a reality show. I guess I was just surprised at the differences that popped up.

So, here's a question for you. So many people get all wigged out by the polygamy thing. I just see it as an alternative lifestyle, one I would not be interested in, but still. Their kids seem to be as happy and well adjusted as most kids; more than a lot actually. So, what's the big deal? I just don't get the hoopla. Where I grew up, by graduation there were guys who had 3, 4, even 5 kids by multiple "baby mamma's", they neither lived with these women, loved them, supported them or their kids. The moms just went on welfare (usually) and lived at home with their moms. No one gets all worked up about this lifestyle. But, if consenting adults choose to actually love each other and live together and raise their kids in a loving home that just happens to have more than two parents in it people freak out. And, how can the state of Utah do anything legally to them? He was only legally married to the first wife, that's not bigamy. That's consenting adults choosing to live together and have a bunch of babies...

I figure as long as they're not doing the creepy child bride thing, abuse and subjugation like that Warren Jeffs guy, as long as they are good people doing their best to raise happy healthy children who are free to choose for themselves, live and let live! ( )