Those We Love Most (original 2012; edition 2012)

Those We Love Most was kindly provided to me by Netgalley for Hyperion.
Expected publication: September 11th 2012 by Hyperion

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I was able to see very early on in this story that this was not the book for me, thus no rating.

Those We Love Most tells the tale of Maura Corrigan who was walking her son to school one day, wasn't paying attention for an apparently selfish reason, when her son James is hit by a car and dies a few days later. Told from the point of view of several different family members including Maura's mother Margaret and her father Roger. Roger is also dealing with grief of his ongoing affair... ongoing for five years. The death of James results in stirring up all the problems that have been kept buried within the family.

So, my issues and reason for not finishing.
This isn't being classified as Christian Fiction but had some huge religious undertones which was a big turn off for me. The comments from Roger regarding Maura's husband really rubbed me the wrong way.
'On paper, he was great son-in-law material:...Pete had an even temperament and no funny earrings or designer facial hair.'
Okay, pause. Seriously? Just because you have earrings or crazy facial hair does not make you any less of a good person. Continuing on.
'Moreover, he was a practicing Catholic, something that had appealed to Roger after the string of Jewish and Protestant boys Maura had dated in high school and college.'
Ugh. I hate this simple-minded way of regarding people in terms of their religious beliefs and defining them based solely on that. Having ANY other religious beliefs than your own is not a terrible thing. Also, just because you're Catholic does not automatically make you a better person. Look at you Mr. Roger, Catholic and yet having a five-year long affair on your wife of FOUR DECADES.

So bottom line, I couldn't get past page 50 based on the huge religious undertones and the cheating - something I could have done without. Two things that I really have no desire to read about.

Before anyone decides to comment on the fact that I didn't give this book a chance, these are just my opinions based on the 50 pages that I felt needed to be stated and that is why I have opted to not rate this book. I knew early on that this was not the book for me and figured it would be best to chuck it rather than force myself to read it in its entirety and then give it a horrible rating.

Author: Lee Woodruff
Published by: Hyperion
Age Recommended: Adult
Reviewed By: Arlena Dean
Book Blog For: GMTA
Rating: 4

Review:

"Those We Love Most" by Lee Woodruff was really a powerful read. This was a read of tragedy not just for one family but a extended family. This was a very realistic read that could happen to any of us...a death of a child. Yes, this novel will be of 'loss, grief, love and two families who are really suffering from it all. We find the mother had been having a affair, while the father was a alcoholic....and the grandfather who was having a affair with the grandma seemed to just take it in as a martyr...What a group of people...Will there be any change? This author did a wonderful job with his detailed dialogue showing much compassion. Who knew that this child's death(James) would charge everything for this family.. breaking them apart but putting them back together again? I found the characters all interesting in that even at the end I am not sure there would be a change for Maura, Roger, Roger,Margaret ...or Julia. Kinda leaves you wondering long after the read.



Did I find "Those We Love Most" a page turner?...Yes...it was a dramatic experience to read. Would I recommend....YES! ( )

I really, really wanted to read Those We Love Most by Lee Woodruff - mostly because I enjoy a good drama centered around the overcoming of a tragedy. So when I saw the summary and the author combination here I couldn't wait to crack it open and get emotionally involved.

There were things that Woodruff did extremely well in Those We Love Most - those being the tension between family, the struggle to put the pieces back together, the vulnerability after walls come down in grief. I felt intimately connected to every member of the family at different moments throughout the book. But in spite of that intimate connection, I still felt as if I was held at arms length.

I think ultimately where the breakdown occurred was in the number of people Those We Love Most dealt with. There were some family members who were on the outskirts, just barely into the story and, as a result, made me feel as if I was still a stranger to what was going on - but the juxtiposition then of having other family members bared completely to me made me feel as if I wasn't a stranger. So ultimately I ended up slightly confused and unable to connect. I just can't think of a better way to put it.

I still recommend reading this book - I think it has some important messages on dealing with grief and guilt, and what happens when trust starts to fracture. I just wish it had been easier for me to connect with. ( )

I love a book that has such powerful emotional honesty that you just can't help becoming invested in it. CBS This Morning journalist Lee Woodruff's first novel, Those We Love Most, is one of those books.

This is a multigenerational story, about Maura, wife and mom to three young children, and her mother Margaret. A moment of inattention by Maura forever changes their lives, one that will cause her to feel incredible guilt and pain. The tragedy that follows is compounded by the secret of betrayal that Maura carries.

Margaret is a rock for her daughter, doing all she can to get her and the family through the aftermath of a beloved child's death. She loves her husband Roger, and when he faces a health crisis, she is also forced to face a secret that he has been hiding from her, one that if she were honest with herself, she already knew.

This is a novel about how hard it is to be married, and the resilience of the human spirit. Margaret describes her life with Roger after many years together:
"The patterns and paths of their life together, especially in the past decade, had become more and more divergent. She had her set schedule: gardening, bridge, exercise, and the occasional lunch with friends. Being a devoted grandmother, a role of which she was immensely proud, also took up a large portion of her time....But Roger spent too much time in the office at his stage in life, in her opinion."
Margaret is a character that many women will relate to: the one who keeps things together, who never falls apart, soldiers through everything.
"Margaret believed it was wife's job to keep the exterior facade spackled and impenetrable, to prevent the cracks from showing on the outside. In her mind, a classy woman never broke rank."

Maura and her husband Pete had their own problems before the tragedy.
"Things had been operating on this half-speed for a while, Maura acknowledged, each of them heading down an easy slipstream in marriage where the valuable, intimate parts begin to erode in a tidal wave of banality."
Woodruff succeeds in bringing these women to life; indeed, they are women you feel that you know in your own life. Her observations about marriage at its different stages will resonate with many women.

The writing is insightful, and the scenes at the hospital will break your heart. It is clear that Woodruff drew on her own experiences with her husband ABC Bob Woodruff's traumatic brain injuries suffered during the Iraq War to write these emotional passages.

I can't remembered being so viscerally affected by a novel; Woodruff's first work of fiction is emotional, heartbreaking and ultimately uplifting. This is a book I will recommend to anyone looking for a story to lose yourself in. ( )