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Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True…
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Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to…

by Brené Brown

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Showing 1-5 of 10 (next | show all)
Braving the Wilderness is the second book I've read by Brené Brown (I recently reviewed Daring Greatly). It's a book about finding belonging within ourselves and using that to relate effectively to others. She writes with very accessible language and a conversational tone that draws the reader in. The book is relatively short, which makes it a fairly quick read.

The wilderness metaphor didn't especially resonate with me, and so sometimes I found myself wondering what exactly she was talking about. She writes: "Belonging so fully to yourself that you’re willing to stand alone is a wilderness—an untamed, unpredictable place of solitude and searching." She adds that "the special courage it takes to experience true belonging is not just about braving the wilderness, it’s about becoming the wilderness. It’s about breaking down the walls, abandoning our ideological bunkers, and living from our wild heart rather than our weary hurt." "Someone, somewhere, will say, 'Don’t do it. You don’t have what it takes to survive the wilderness. This is when you reach deep into your wild heart and remind yourself, 'I am the wilderness.'" I think Brene Brown is wonderful, but I'm still reading those lines and thinking huh?!? Maybe I'm just a bit too concrete.

That's not to say that all of it was lost on me. When she wrote "cynicism and distrust have a stranglehold on our hearts", I felt like she could easily have been speaking about my own heart. She tells us that in order to achieve true belonging, we must be vulnerable and have the courage to take on difficult things and be uncomfortable. I liked her observation that when we're bullshitting, "the truth doesn’t matter, what I think matters."

The book is focused around four key approaches to improve belonging:

People Are Hard to Hate Close Up. Move In.
Speak Truth to Bullshit. Be Civil.
Hold Hands. With Strangers.
Strong Back. Soft Front. Wild Heart.
The book contains many useful nuggets of advice, including practicing gratitude and breaking the habit of seeking confirmation that we're not good enough. There are also many common sense ideas that are perhaps not so common, such as approaching conflict with a genuine attempt to understand the other person's perspective. While boundaries may seem like a challenge sometimes, Brown takes the perspective that establishing and sticking to clear boundaries in conflict actually promotes compassion and belonging. Boundaries are the first ingredient in her BRAVING acronym for facing the wilderness.

While there was definitely good stuff there, I have to say that for me this book was a bit of a disappointment. I'm a big Brene Brown fan, and I like what she has to say, particularly about vulnerability, but the wilderness metaphor just didn't do it for me. I definitely want to read more of her work, though. ( )
  MH_at_home | Aug 8, 2018 |
B-Boundaries, R-Reliability, A-Accountability, V-Vault, I-Integrity, N-Non-judgement, G- Generosity

Stiff spine, soft front, wild heart

Belong to yourself

A good book to discuss how to build and keep trust, including trusting yourself. ( )
  Safenn | Jul 31, 2018 |
I was interested in this book as it talked about finding true belonging, something that is hard to do in this world, and having watched Brene Brown talk about vulnerability, I was keen to read what she had to say on belonging, and I was not disappointed. She covered the topic thoroughly and gave guidance about how to go about it in today's world.

Braving the Wilderness was only published at the end of 2017 so Brene Brown refers to recent world events, culture and society. This is as much a guide to dealing with the current negativity, lack of integrity and fake news and politic lies as it is about finding true belonging. It talks about how to deal with it and how to stay connected in a positive healthy way.

The section headings are advice on their own:

People are hard to hate close up. Move in.
Speak truth to bullshit. Be civil.
Hold hands. With strangers.
Strong back. Soft front. Wild Heart.

I would recommend this book to anyone struggling in today's world, and trying to find a way to cope with the overwhelming amount of noise it creates in our day to day lives.
( )
  purplequeennl | Jul 11, 2018 |
Waar de Amerikaanse schrijfster, zakenvrouw en coach Brené Brown in eerdere boeken en TED talks de nadruk lag op de kracht van kwetsbaarheid en moed, komen deze elementen in haar nieuwe boek Verlangen naar verbinding: er echt bij horen en de moed om alleen te staan (een soepele vertaling van Braving the Wilderness) bij elkaar. Waar de 'wildernis' al in de Engelstalige titel verpakt zit, komt het begrip - als beetje bestseller auteur leg je beslag op één of meer zelfgedefinieerde of van een nieuwe betekenis voorziene termen - wat uit de lucht vallen. In de weerbarstige werkelijkheid van alledag, waarin positieve psychologie niet 1-2-3 lijkt te werken en je er alleen voor staat, komt het aan op jouw acceptatie, moed en bewust handelen in het hier en nu. Ja, als mens zoek je verbinding. De kracht van het collectief geeft bescherming, inzichten en synergie, of dat nu onder collega's, in een kerk of met andere sportfans is. Als het er op aankomt, mag je echter ook je eigen keuzes maken, zeggen waar het op staat en de meerderheid juist niet in het kwade volgen. Het vraagt om een sterke rug (door bijvoorbeeld grenzen te stellen, verantwoordelijkheid te nemen, integer te handelen en ruimhartig te zijn), een zachte voorkant (geen harnas) en een wild hart (om in de wildernis vitaal te blijven).
Brown heeft talloze voorbeelden uit Amerikaanse raciale verhoudingen, haar eigen jeugd, de Bijbel (Jacobs worsteling met God is treffend), kerkgang en organisaties die ze begeleid. Carl Jung's inzicht in de paradox, de spanning die het christelijk geloof duidt rond het koninkrijk van God dat deels al wel en nog niet aanwezig is. In de 'wildernis' heb je dan een 'wild' hart dat zich bewust is van de pijn op de wereld, zijn eigen pijn niet bagetalliseert, dat bruist van dankbaarheid en zich overgeeft aan pure vreugde zonder het leed op de wereld te ontkennen. ( )
  hjvanderklis | Jun 29, 2018 |
The author is a research professor in Houston who did the acclaimed TED talk on vulnerability and three other books.

I love the blurb "True belonging doesn't require us to change who we are. It requires us to be who we are." Nota bene - the book includes Notes and Index.

Brene Brown gathers data and analyzes it, looking for patterns and a "clearer picture". She draws upon the image of "the Wilderness" used as a metaphor "to represent everything from a vast and dangerous environment where we are forced to navigate difficult trials to a refuge of nature and beauty where we seek space for contemplation." While she does not interrogate the contradiction in these two poles, she catches the common foot that all wilderness metaphors share -- the notions of "solitude, vulnerability, and an emotional, spiritual, or physical quest". [36]

Taking up the quest to belong, the author dug into what we mean by "trust" and finds seven elements that are useful in both trusting others and ourselves. [38-40] I like her acronym BRAVING: Boundaries - respect them; Reliability - deliver and don't overpromise; Accountability - own your mistakes; Vault - keep confidences; Integrity - choose courage and correctness; Nonjudgment - we can talk about what we need and feel; Generosity - be generous of interpretation.

Professor Brown concludes: "There will be times when standing alone feels too hard, too scary, and we'll doubt our ability to make our way through the uncertainty. Someone, somewhere, will say, "Don't do it. You don't have what it takes to survive the wilderness." This is when you reach deep into your wild heart and remind yourself, "I AM the wilderness." ( )
  keylawk | Jun 10, 2018 |
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Brené Brownprimary authorall editionscalculated
Beusekom, Bonella vanTranslatorsecondary authorsome editionsconfirmed
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To my father: Thank you for insisting that I always speak up and take a stand--even when you passionately disagree.
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When I start writing, I inevitably feel myself swallowed by fear.
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A life-changing book that uses new research to challenge old beliefs about belonging.A timely and important new book that challenges everything we think we know about cultivating true belonging in our communities, organizations, and culture. Social scientist Brené Brown, PhD, LMSW, has sparked a global conversation about the experiences that bring meaning to our lives--experiences of courage, vulnerability, love, belonging, shame, and empathy. In Braving the Wilderness, Brown redefines what it means to truly belong in an age of increased polarization. With her trademark mix of research, storytelling, and honesty, Brown will again change the cultural conversation while mapping a clear path to true belonging. Brown argues that we're experiencing a spiritual crisis of disconnection, and introduces four practices of true belonging that challenge everything we believe about ourselves and each other. She writes, "True belonging requires us to believe in and belong to ourselves so fully that we can find sacredness both in being a part of something and in standing alone when necessary. But in a culture that's rife with perfectionism and pleasing, and with the erosion of civility, it's easy to stay quiet, hide in our ideological bunkers, or fit in rather than show up as our true selves and brave the wilderness of uncertainty and criticism. But true belonging is not something we negotiate or accomplish with others; it's a daily practice that demands integrity and authenticity. It's a personal commitment that we carry in our hearts." Brown offers us the clarity and courage we need to find our way back to ourselves and to each other. And that path cuts right through the wilderness. Brown writes, "The wilderness is an untamed, unpredictable place of solitude and searching. It is a place as dangerous as it is breathtaking, a place as sought after as it is feared. But it turns out to be the place of true belonging, and it's the bravest and most sacred place you will ever stand."--From jacket.… (more)

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