This felt more negative than the men's version. Interestingly, although these writers were also more angry than their husbands, they were also accepting more blame for their situations. Like Pamela Stone's [Opting Out?], this collection made me kinda glad I'm not a Type-A and thus have no grand ambitions to worry about giving up. Because they always have to give them up. At the same time, there seemed to be a thread of unrealistic expectations. Most of the writers grew up with mothers who did all the housework. So no wonder that they're frustrated at doing it now. They don't want to do any housework, shared or otherwise. As someone with a long list of childhood chores, that made me less than sympathetic. Living together didn't come out looking like a great option, surprisingly. There was one piece explaining why the author and her partner will never marry, which was interesting and entertaining but I never figured out her reason.

A few observations I particularly liked: Kate Christensen: "Like most of the girls I knew when I was growing up, I'd always assumed I'd marry the perfect man. But for me, the man himself wasn't an important element in my fantasies of the future; he existed in my imagination as a flawless but shadowy alter ego, a male version of myself who would read my mind, meet all my needs, and have none of his own."

Cynthia Kling (on relationship advice from well-meaning friends): "Women complain that men boss them around and tell them what to do, but what about all that female coercion? The oppressive solidarity of the smart-girl set?"

Ellen Gilchrist: "I think older women probably make better mothers in many ways. But young women are more selfish and you have to be selfish to demand time for yourself when you have children. Young women are closer to the time when they were manipulative and childish and they don't let their babies manipulate them as much as older mothers do. These are only my conclusions from watching children in grocery stores." ( )

Personal essays by women in a variety of situations about love, family, and children. Some of the essays were very thought provoking, some were self-indulgent nonsense. It was really a mixed bag and it didn't have the teeth promised by the title. ( )

Well known, uneven set of essays. Ellen Gilchrist needs no introduction and offers quite a different take on the toll (not) that motherhood exerts on work and writing. But this book did turn me on to a couple of insightful writers I now look out for: Helen Schulman, Elissa Schappell, Kate Christensen, Jill Bialosky. I think that covers it. Of course, all the people writing down for Glamour and Self and um Glamour are smarter than their supposed readers but some of them are a lot sharper than I would have guessed. Very much a New York book, though. There are a few token reps from Oregon, wherever, but they all belong to the same New York (dumb girl) magazine network. ( )

This is a book of short stories. I liked alot of the stories, and could very much see myself in alot of them. Though it was hard going from one writers style to another's at times. ( )

post-feminist rants on "surviving" being female;
26 Women Tell the Truth About Sex, Solitude, Work, Motherhood, and Marriage

3.03