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Het drama van het begaafde kind by Alice…
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Het drama van het begaafde kind (1979)

by Alice Miller

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1,584174,603 (3.97)27
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Title:Het drama van het begaafde kind
Authors:Alice Miller
Info:Unieboek BV (Paperback)
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The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self by Alice Miller (1979)

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» See also 27 mentions

English (14)  German (2)  Dutch (1)  All (17)
Showing 1-5 of 14 (next | show all)
Simply Incredible. I have no words yet. ( )
  kbosso | May 2, 2017 |
I got this as a gift and it turned out to be a great book. ( )
  JennysBookBag.com | Sep 28, 2016 |
Pensaba que iba a ser diferente de lo que al final encontré. No sabría definir con precisión lo que significa ese "diferente", pero desde luego sé que no esperaba que estuviera enfocado exclusivamente desde el punto de vista psicoanalítico. El concepto narcisismo se menciona demasiadas veces para mi gusto.

Supongo que habrá a quien le guste este estilo. Para mí no es más que una anécdota. ( )
  5oclockgazpacho | Nov 22, 2014 |
The title here is a bit of a misnomer - 'Gifted Child' in this sense does not necessarily mean a child of academic gifts, but one with an attuned empathetic sense, and thus susceptible to emotional abuse. When this sense is combined with a deficiency or disorder on the part of the parent - anxiety, manic-depressive, etc., the child has to go to extreme lengths.

This creates two 'selves' - the 'true self' - that is, the child's own 'genuine' personality and needs, and the 'false self', complying, totally obedient, utterly withdrawn, willing to lie in order to present a false happy image. The true self is subsumed to the lie, or the false self. The personal needs are neglected.

Now what's the problem with all this, you ask? If a child is intelligent enough to perform on their own, and emotionally intelligent enough to perceive what their parents want, they may yet be ignored or blindsided in order for the parent to perform their own needs first, and the child's as secondary or auxiliary.

Such a book is extremely uncomfortable to read. Perhaps for many it hits too hard. Although there have been some (many?) superseding advances in developmental environmental psychology as well as the epigenetics of mental disorder and abuse, this is still a fascinating read. ( )
  HadriantheBlind | Mar 30, 2013 |
Alice Miller nails it. Children who are prevented from developing an authentic self by narcissistic or otherwise harmful and inadequate parenting will find validation, solace, and guidance through the resulting pain, anger, and confusion. I wish the author had used a less misleading title. ( )
  jettstream | Jul 22, 2011 |
Showing 1-5 of 14 (next | show all)
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Author nameRoleType of authorWork?Status
Alice Millerprimary authorall editionscalculated
Ward, RuthTranslatorsecondary authorsome editionsconfirmed
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Experience has taught us that we have only one enduring weapon in our struggle against mental illness: the emotional discovery of the truth about the unique history of our childhood.
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Amazon.com Product Description (ISBN 0465016901, Paperback)

Why are many of the most successful people plagued by feelings of emptiness and alienation? This wise and profound book has provided thousands of readers with an answer—and has helped them to apply it to their own lives.Far too many of us had to learn as children to hide our own feelings, needs, and memories skillfully in order to meet our parents’ expectations and win their ”love.” Alice Miller writes, ”When I used the word ’gifted’ in the title, I had in mind neither children who receive high grades in school nor children talented in a special way. I simply meant all of us who have survived an abusive childhood thanks to an ability to adapt even to unspeakable cruelty by becoming numb… Without this ’gift’ offered us by nature, we would not have survived.” But merely surviving is not enough. The Drama of the Gifted Child helps us to reclaim our life by discovering our own crucial needs and our own truth.

(retrieved from Amazon Thu, 12 Mar 2015 18:06:03 -0400)

(see all 5 descriptions)

Publisher's description: Why are many of the most successful people plagued by feelings of emptiness and alienation? This wise and profound book has provided thousands of readers with an answer—and has helped them to apply it to their own lives.Far too many of us had to learn as children to hide our own feelings, needs, and memories skillfully in order to meet our parents' expectations and win their love. Alice Miller writes, When I used the word 'gifted' in the title, I had in mind neither children who receive high grades in school nor children talented in a special way. I simply meant all of us who have survived an abusive childhood thanks to an ability to adapt even to unspeakable cruelty by becoming numb… Without this 'gift' offered us by nature, we would not have survived. But merely surviving is not enough. The Drama of the Gifted Child helps us to reclaim our life by discovering our own crucial needs and our own truth.… (more)

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