Chodron is an American Buddhist nun and is apparently a prolific writer. Going through some difficult times now, this book called to me from the Border's book shelf.

I'm going to admit that I started off reading this book thinking "What the hell are you talking about?" Leaning into the sharp points, facing your demons, embracing suffering - all sounds well and good but HOW do you do it? Buddhism is all abut guidelines and rarely ever says "Here is how you do this"

The more I read, though, the more I got it. I need to be kinder to myself. Less critical, less admonishment. The underlying factor here is if you can't have compassion for yourself, it's going to be difficult to be compassionate towards others. There is no right or wrong, no good or evil. Things just ARE. We're all here for a short time, so why not give yourself a break and lighten up a little?

I'm a classic case of escapism. When things are difficult, I do my best but I always retreat; into books, classes, knitting, what have you. Chodron encourages us to not reach for comfort when things go rotten. That's going to be mighty hard to do.

There's a really good chapter about not harming others. While you may not deliberately harm people, chances are you are doing harm when you're upset, embarrassed, angry, etc. Words, actions, emotions all mean the world and you have to be aware of what you say, do and feel. Being aware of how you react to things is even applauded as a great first step.

I'm going to try to put these things into practice. We'll see how it goes :) ( )

Self-Help for those trying to transcend Self. The ultimate in ironic advice. By not striving, we strive to discover the "bodhichitta" within, a Sanskrit word that means "noble or awakened heart." (86) Such an awakened heart can become a servant of peace. "The word 'bodhisattva' refers to those who have committed themselves to the path of compassion." (98)
"Underneath our ordinary lives, underneath all the talking we do, all the moving we do, all the thoughts in our minds, there's a fundamental groundlessness. It's there bubbling along all the time. We experience it as restlessness and edginess. We experience it as fear. It motivates passion, aggression, ignorance, jealousy, and pride, but we never get down to the essence of it." (34)
"His Holiness the Dalai Lama describes two kinds of selfish people: the unwise and the wise. Unwise selfish people think only of themselves, and the result is confusion and pain. Wise selfish people know that the best thing they can do for themselves is to be there for others. As a result, they experience joy." (88)
"This is all the path we have." (141) "This path has one very distinct characteristic: it is not pre-fabricated. It doesn't already exist. The path that we're talking about is the moment-by-moment evolution of our experience, the moment-by-moment evolution of the world of phenomena, the moment-by-moment evolution of our thoughts and our emotions." (143)
In the end, "our thoughts and memories, 'good and bad, happy and sad,' all 'vanish into emptiness like the imprint of a bird in the sky.'" (131)

I read this book when my favorite pet was dying of cancer. It really helped me find some peace. ( )

Another compassionate, comforting and inspiring book by Pema. She appeals to people of all religions who are looking for ways to connect with love and tenderness to their own hearts, and the hearts of others ( )

This book has twenty two chapters related to different aspects of healing from pain and how to handle difficult situations. The text bounces from philosophy to self-help/encouragement, to Buddhist fables, to meditation and though techniques, and the like. The structure of the book as that each chapter in itself has many of these thematic elements. As such, one could decide to read just one chapter and it would likely touch on some key thoughts and changes in approach that would lead the reader to get loose from some emotions (or in some cases get closer to emotions) around their situation. As Chodron is in vogue in contemporary Western Buddhist practice, the book perhaps predictably fits with some of the philosophies from others in press in the early 2000's like Jack Kornfield and Tara Brach.

I did not particularly find the book helpful. It's very scattered and very 'jumpy'. It does not explain points or particularly back them up as much as put out a stream of thought which then jumps to another in the very next paragraph. Imagine speaking by phone to a guru with limited time, where they are introducing instruction and concepts about how to relive your suffering within a set time limit. So the pacing is not at all relaxed. It also introduces more than a little Tibetan or Sanskrit words, which is not uncommon occasionally, but the frequency is alarming when the Western reader has more use for the concept than the definition and the word--and unlike other authors she does not dwell on the concept, but per the pacing, jumps to other somewhat repetitive ideas. Alas, this is a personal interpretation, and perhaps reading this as a man I don't mesh with the style as I would if I were a woman, or of a different age. Many seem to like the book. If you are a fast-paced person who isn't going to read this cover to cover, it could be very helpful and rewarding when situations are tough. ( )