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(Not that You Asked): Rants, Exploits, and Obsessions by Steve Almond
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(Not that You Asked): Rants, Exploits, and Obsessions

by Steve Almond

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August 11, 2007

Not that you asked
A Sampler
by: Steve Almond

The short pieces in this sampler are "raves and rants" by this Steve. I think they are autobiographical. A Jewish lad who, in the last short story explains his complicated and "dysfunctional" family. He has a psychiatrist mother, a remote father, two brothers and grandparents back 2 generations with various degrees of orthodox religion and background. He declares himself an agnostic.

As with several proclaimed jewish authors, S. Almond, whether religious or not, is very conscious of his jewishness. This is just fascinating to me. For many years I have been interested in this race? people? religion? who, even experts are divided on correct definition.

This started in my sunday school days. My instruction was as much or more about the Old Testament than the New testament. Of course, the history and story of God's chosen people takes up twice the space in the first of the Bible. Then, when all the prophecies and foundations are fulfilled, the New Testament explains that the chosen people are only preparation for the completion of God's plans and a new set of instructions is given.

Well, that makes for an amazing history of this chosen people the last 2000 years.

But enough about the reviewer's interest. I read lots of reviews. Many of them are more about the reviewer and the reviewer's great knowledge and erudition. We don't want to try that out!

The first selection in the sample is hilarious. I don't want to spoil it for you, but the part about the dog playing tug with Steve's mother as she is trying to pry the condom out of the dog's mouth really is funny. He does write quite a lot about sex. I bought another of his books because reviewers always compare the present volume to the author's previous works. He really does write a lot about sex. I can't wait for the complete book.
by robertsgirl
robertsgirl | Jul 9, 2009 |  
Eh.

Let me say that I am perversely offended by this Advance Reader's Edition "special excerpt booklet." Perversely because, although I didn't really enjoy the "special excerpt booklet," I'm offended that "they" didn't send me the entire book. I do understand that there's an element of looking a gift horse in the mouth involved here. But, what can I say? I find it kinda chintzy.

Getting past my irritation with the form to my thoughts on the substance, I will say that Almond occasionally made me chuckle but, for the most part, I was unimpressed. His insights came across as shallow and self-satisfied.

Which is probably why it took me 10 months to finish a 42 page "booklet." ( )
iammbb | Jun 1, 2008 |  
This was an early reviewer copy that was delivered courtesy of LibraryThing. I requested it on a bit of a whim, mainly because it seemed mildly amusing, and I liked the cover (I know, I know). So I was very pleasantly surprised when I got around to reading the slim volume. The only bad thing about this book is, in fact, its brevity. It is merely a sampler, but it is a sample of some fresh, witty, intelligent, self-aware writing that hits all the right notes. Steve Almond is on par with David Sedaris and David Rakoff in my mind, and I will definitely track down some of his other books. He relates these painful stories with wit and insight. In short it was just damn funny.
vegetrendian | Mar 21, 2008 |  
This has some extremely funny essays. If you hate Oprah, you'll have every reason to read this book. ( )
foundationman | Jan 24, 2008 |  
Yet another writer who's managed to make condoms boring. The book's mildly amusing in parts, but mostly a mushy slog. The author even managed to make an adolescent shoplifting scene boring.

The main problem is that other writers have set that bar too high. Vollmann does exploits. Nobody beats Sedaris' rants. And obsessions? Don't get me started on Augusten Burroughs or David Foster Wallace.

The only essay that saved the collection from a 2 star rating was the one on Vonnegut and the pretentiousness of academia. But academia has been skewered by so many other people that the author needed to come up with something new here. Instead, he analyzed the lingo and his accretive embarrassment about his early love for Vonnegut. Some of this, such as the way he masked the true nature of a paper, was mildly amusing. (One wonders if he moved onto Delillo and Pynchon when he left the Vonnegut camp.)

What i get from this is a suburban kid trying very hard to be funny and edgy. He either doesn't let us in enough or he's just too 'nice' to succeed.

~ ~ ~

From "The Levels of Greatness a Fiction Writer Can Achieve in America" by Tao Lin, http://www.thestranger.com/seatt...

THREE-FOR-A-DOLLAR FEEDER FISH: Steve Almond

Has been reviewed by the New York Times and published books on corporate presses but one of them was a nonfiction book about candy and he fights back publicly when shit-talked by Gawker by first making sure that everyone knows he does not read Gawker and only found out he got shit-talked because someone else told him. Quit his adjunct teaching job because Condoleezza Rice was invited to speak at his college. Has sex once a month with fans he meets through MySpace. Receives up to three e-mails a day from a mix of MFA students at community colleges, Centipedes in the Darkness wanting blurbs, and 14-year-old girls who have lived their entire lives in gated communities. Will not be forgotten easily even after he is dead and his books are out of print because of how easy it is to talk shit about him. Will then be forgotten very easily, completely, and forever a few days after I type this when there's someone easier to talk shit about. ( )
NativeRoses | Dec 11, 2007 |  
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Amazon.com (ISBN 0812977599, Paperback)

(Not that You Asked): Rants, Exploits, and Obsessions is an Amazon Significant Seven selection for October 2007

An Exclusive Essay from Author Steve Almond

Steve Almond is obsessed. He first offered the world a peek into his fixations in My Life in Heavy Metal, a collection of short stories throbbing with hookups, drunken kisses, failed passes, souring relationships, and, naturally, heavy metal. But Almond forever chewed the hard chocolate shell from his creamy inner obsessive with 2004's Candyfreak: A Journey through the Chocolate Underbelly of America--a sort of On the Road for the sugar set, documenting an epic journey through America's confectionary highways and backroads. Almond is back with (Not that You Asked): Rants, Exploits, and Obsessions, a collection of autobiographical pieces covering topics as diverse as Oprah Winfrey, Kurt Vonnegut, sexual failure, and the many varieties of shame. We asked Almond just what it is about obsession that drives his work, as well is its intrinsic value in all art--low and high. --Jon Foro




The Obsession Engine
Why House of Rock with Bret Michaels could be your next novel. Or not.

By Steve Almond

A close friend of mine – who may or may not be my wife – recently fell in love with the VH-1 reality series House of Rock. For those of you who are not hip to its charms, HoR stars Bret Michaels, the former lead singer of Poison, and a gaggle of women vying to become his soul mate. I hope you will not be shocked to learn that several of these potential soul mates are strippers. Nor do all of them appear to be virgins.

My friend insists that her interest in the program is purely anthropological. But I happen to know that she spent a good portion of her adolescence listening to Eighties hair metal bands and dreaming about bedding dudes like Bret Michaels and even working, briefly, as a waitress in a topless bar. She comes by her obsession naturally, is my point.

The longer I read and write, the more I come to view obsession as the essential engine of literature. I am not suggesting that my wife, er, friend should write a novel about House of Rock. (The series is, by her own description, a kind of pulp novel already--histrionic, predictable, crushingly squalid.) What I’m suggesting is that her allegiance to the program identifies essential fears and desires within her, ones which embarrass her quite robustly and therefore belong in the novel she hopes to write.

To take this a step further: I’m not interested in writing that isn’t obsessive. Who is? We’re all drama queens in the end. We all come to stories with two basic questions: Who do I care about? And What do they care about? As long as our hero, or heroine, cares deeply about something (i.e. is obsessed), and as long as they’re willing to tell us their own twisted version of the truth, we’ll come along for the ride.

Don’t believe me? Let me call to the stand my star witness, Humbert Humbert. Read more...


(retrieved from Amazon Fri, 24 Apr 2009 07:58:01 -0400)

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