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Loading... How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It: Finding Love Beyond…by Patricia Love
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will love Sign up for LibraryThing to find out whether you'll like this book. Throw away all your relationship self-help books. This one nails it. While the title certainly appeals to men, the work is well balanced on targeting fears and anxieties facing men and women in a relationship and focuses on connection rather than confrontation. I know I'm going to read this one again. ( )I read the paper version of this book, but it is available as a Kindle ebook on Amazon. I would have never bought this book on my own, the title is so silly, I would have thought it was written by Dave Barry. But, it was recommended to me by my psychiatrist, you can't get a better endorsement than that. "Male emotions are like women's sexuality, you can't be too direct too quickly." That's my favorite quote from the book. The point of the book is that men want to be connected to women as much as women want to be connected to men. It's just that guys are not your girlfriend, we don't connect by talking the way women do. The very thing that makes women feel safer makes men feel threatened. I've read a lot of books on counseling, relationships and psychology, and this book explains 'what makes men tick' better than anything I've read before. Women, if you want to get closer to your guy, stop taking advice from women's magazines and read this book. Men, if you want to get closer to the woman you love, if you want to understand why you feel so overwhelmed by her, if you want to stop the endless cycle of fear/shame, approach/retreat, read this book. no reviews | add a review
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| Book description |
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Men are right. The “relationship talk” does not help. Dr. Patricia Love’s and
Dr. Steven Stosny’s How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It
reveals the stunning truth about marital happiness:
Love is not about better communication.
It's about connection.
You'll never get a closer relationship
with your man by talking to him like you
talk to one of your girlfriends.
Male emotions are like women's sexuality:
you can't be too direct too quickly.
There are four ways to connect with a man:touch, activity, sex, routines.
Men want closer marriages just as much as women do,but not if they has to act like a woman.
Talking makes women move closer;
it makes men move away.
The secret of the silent male is this:
his wife supplies the meaning in his life.
The stunning truth about love is that talking doesn’t help.
Have you ever had this conversation with your spouse?
Wife: “Honey, we need to talk about us.”
Husband: “Do we have to?”
Drs. Patricia Love and Steven Stosny have studied this all-too-familiar dynamic between men and women and have reached a truly shocking conclusion. Even with the best of intentions, talking about your relationship doesn’t bring you together, and it will eventually drive you apart.
The reason for this is that underneath most couples’ fights, there is a biological difference at work. A woman’s vulnerability to fear and anxiety makes her draw closer, while a man’s subtle sensitivity to shame makes him pull away in response. This is why so many married couples fall into the archetypal roles of nagging wife/stonewalling husband, and why improving a marriage can’t happen through words.
How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It teaches couples how to get closer in ways that don’t require “trying to turn a man into a woman.” Rich in stories of couples who have turned their marriages around, and full of practical advice about the behaviors that make and break marriages, this essential guide will help couples find love beyond words.
(retrieved from Amazon Fri, 24 Apr 2009 07:58:22 -0400)
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