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Der Soziopath von nebenan: Die Skrupellosen:…
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Der Soziopath von nebenan: Die Skrupellosen: ihre Lügen, Taktiken und… (original 2005; edition 2006)

by Martha Stout, Karsten Petersen (Translator)

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1,071487,805 (3.6)52
Member:clawood
Title:Der Soziopath von nebenan: Die Skrupellosen: ihre Lügen, Taktiken und Tricks (German Edition)
Authors:Martha Stout
Other authors:Karsten Petersen (Translator)
Info:Springer (2006), Edition: 4th Printing., Hardcover, 306 pages
Collections:Your library
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The Sociopath Next Door by Martha Stout (2005)

  1. 01
    Lunch with a Sociopath by Lucie Lilly Pawlak (lucie.lilly)
  2. 02
    American Wife by Curtis Sittenfeld (susanbooks)
    susanbooks: One of Stout's examples seems to be a not-so-thinly veiled George B. Interesting to read the nonfictional (but speculative) & fictional portrayals together.
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Showing 1-5 of 47 (next | show all)
If you would like a good read to understand just what a sociopath is and how they think and operate, this would be a good read for you. It even offers suggestions for dealing with sociopaths in your own life. ( )
1 vote magnolia2 | May 6, 2014 |
After reading The Sociopath Next Door it just confirmed to me what I already knew about one of my brothers, that he is a sociopath without a conscience. From childhood he was a pathological liar, he lied for no reason whatsoever. He was always a crowd pleaser, people warmed to him and he is very manipulative.

He conned me $9000.00 in a business deal and calmly told me "Do what you have to do" when I threatened to sue him. The good thing is, most of the advice this book offered regarding how to deal with sociopaths I already apply to my brother. I make sure and have limited contact with him and keep him a safe distance away from my family and I.

This book also offered some helpful tips for identifying sociopaths which should come in handy because I do believe there are a few at the bank I am working at. ( )
1 vote Zack_Anthony | Mar 9, 2014 |
I think about this book ALL the time...especially when dealing with people that I believe lie ALL the time.

I had never thought about my tendency to date guys that I pity until I read this book.
Down on their luck bad boy types...you know the ones...yes...I'm that good girl in Tom Petty songs that always falls for the bad boy with a streak of bad luck.

Dr. Stout points out that in order to protect yourself from sociopaths, you must examine & avoid the "pity play".
When we pity someone that we think we love...we will do almost anything for that person.

Per Dr. Stout:
"After listening for almost twenty-five years to the stories my patients tell me about sociopaths who have invaded and injured their lives, when I am asked, “How can I tell whom not to trust?” the answer I give usually surprises people. The natural expectation is that I will describe some sinister-sounding detail of behavior or snippet of body language or threatening use of language that is the subtle giveaway. Instead, I take people aback by assuring them that the tip-off is none of these things, for none of these things is reliably present. Rather, the best clue is, of all things, the pity play. The most reliable sign, the most universal behavior of unscrupulous people is not directed, as one might imagine, or our fearfulness. It is, perversely, an appeal to our sympathy …

More than admiration — more even than fear — pity from good people is carte blanche. When we pity, we are, at least for the moment, defenseless, and like so many of the essentially positive human characteristics that bind us together in groups … our emotional vulnerability when we pity is used against us by those who have no conscience."

This book taught me important questions to ask myself before dating a guy:
Do I respect him or do I feel sorry for him & want to help him?
If I can handle my shit & pay my bills & stay employed...why can't he & why would I date someone that is unable/unwilling to do the same & is perfectly ok with sitting back while I do all the work?
Do I feel like I am constantly playing a game with this person?
Do I feel like I am being manipulated?
Do I experience cognitive dissonance in my conversations/interactions with this person?
Is my loyalty blinding me to his negative traits?
Is my loyalty, sympathy, empathy & tendency to pity being taken advantage of by him?

Excellent interview with Stout:
http://www.interviewmagazine.com/cult... ( )
3 vote PiperUp | Jan 28, 2014 |
A well-written non-fiction text on sociopaths. The 13 techniques on how to protect yourself from a superficially charming but dangerous "sociopath next door" is excellent, and the rest of the text is a good balance between scientific research and subjective analysis, which makes it easy to read. At times I felt the example used were a bit dramatic, but the author did state upfront that to protect privacy of her clients and to make for easier reading the sociopaths she used as examples were more composites than any one person. Overall, this was a minor point and the book was informative, compassionate and encouraged readers to continue to believe in the good of a conscience, even when those without a conscience appear to be "winners." An interesting read ( )
2 vote JudyCroome | Nov 15, 2013 |
Just skimmed through this, cannot understand how one could never feel any guilt.
1 vote | Liz_57 | Jul 26, 2013 |
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For Steve Stout, my brother and the person I think of first when I think of strength of character
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Imagine--if you can--not having a conscience, none at all, no feelings of guilt or remorse no matter what you do, no limiting sense of concern for the well-being of strangers, friends or even family members.
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The conscience of a people is their power. - John Dryden
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(Click to show. Warning: May contain spoilers.)
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Book description
Who is the devil you know?

Is it your lying, cheating ex-husband?
Your sadistic high school gym teacher?
Your boss who loves to humiliate people in meetings?
The colleague who stole your idea and passed it off as her own?

In the pages of The Sociopath Next Door, you will realize that your ex was not just misunderstood. He’s a sociopath. And your boss, teacher, and colleague? They may be sociopaths too.

We are accustomed to think of sociopaths as violent criminals, but in The Sociopath Next Door, Harvard psychologist Martha Stout reveals that a shocking 4 percent of ordinary people—one in twenty-five—has an often undetected mental disorder, the chief symptom of which is that that person possesses no conscience. He or she has no ability whatsoever to feel shame, guilt, or remorse. One in twenty-five everyday Americans, therefore, is secretly a sociopath. They could be your colleague, your neighbor, even family. And they can do literally anything at all and feel absolutely no guilt.

How do we recognize the remorseless? One of their chief characteristics is a kind of glow or charisma that makes sociopaths more charming or interesting than the other people around them. They’re more spontaneous, more intense, more complex, or even sexier than everyone else, making them tricky to identify and leaving us easily seduced. Fundamentally, sociopaths are different because they cannot love. Sociopaths learn early on to show sham emotion, but underneath they are indifferent to others’ suffering. They live to dominate and thrill to win.

The fact is, we all almost certainly know at least one or more sociopaths already. Part of the urgency in reading The Sociopath Next Door is the moment when we suddenly recognize that someone we know—someone we worked for, or were involved with, or voted for—is a sociopath. But what do we do with that knowledge? To arm us against the sociopath, Dr. Stout teaches us to question authority, suspect flattery, and beware the pity play. Above all, she writes, when a sociopath is beckoning, do not join the game.

It is the ruthless versus the rest of us, and The Sociopath Next Door will show you how to recognize and defeat the devil you know.

Haiku summary

Amazon.com Product Description (ISBN 0767915828, Paperback)

Who is the devil you know?

Is it your lying, cheating ex-husband?
Your sadistic high school gym teacher?
Your boss who loves to humiliate people in meetings?
The colleague who stole your idea and passed it off as her own?

In the pages of The Sociopath Next Door, you will realize that your ex was not just misunderstood. He’s a sociopath. And your boss, teacher, and colleague? They may be sociopaths too.

We are accustomed to think of sociopaths as violent criminals, but in The Sociopath Next Door, Harvard psychologist Martha Stout reveals that a shocking 4 percent of ordinary people—one in twenty-five—has an often undetected mental disorder, the chief symptom of which is that that person possesses no conscience. He or she has no ability whatsoever to feel shame, guilt, or remorse. One in twenty-five everyday Americans, therefore, is secretly a sociopath. They could be your colleague, your neighbor, even family. And they can do literally anything at all and feel absolutely no guilt.

How do we recognize the remorseless? One of their chief characteristics is a kind of glow or charisma that makes sociopaths more charming or interesting than the other people around them. They’re more spontaneous, more intense, more complex, or even sexier than everyone else, making them tricky to identify and leaving us easily seduced. Fundamentally, sociopaths are different because they cannot love. Sociopaths learn early on to show sham emotion, but underneath they are indifferent to others’ suffering. They live to dominate and thrill to win.

The fact is, we all almost certainly know at least one or more sociopaths already. Part of the urgency in reading The Sociopath Next Door is the moment when we suddenly recognize that someone we know—someone we worked for, or were involved with, or voted for—is a sociopath. But what do we do with that knowledge? To arm us against the sociopath, Dr. Stout teaches us to question authority, suspect flattery, and beware the pity play. Above all, she writes, when a sociopath is beckoning, do not join the game.

It is the ruthless versus the rest of us, and The Sociopath Next Door will show you how to recognize and defeat the devil you know.

(retrieved from Amazon Mon, 30 Sep 2013 13:36:44 -0400)

(see all 5 descriptions)

[The author] reveals [in this book] that a shocking 4 percent of ordinary people--one in twenty-five--has an often undetected mental disorder, the chief symptom of which is that that person possesses no conscience. He or she has no ability whatsoever to feel shame, guilt, or remorse.... They can do literally anything at all and feel absolutely no guilt.... Fundamentally, sociopaths are different because they cannot love. Sociopaths learn early on to show sham emotion, but underneath they are indifferent to others' suffering. They live to dominate and thrill to win.... To arm us against the sociopath, [the author] teaches us to question authority, suspect flattery, and beware the pity play. Above all, she writes, when a sociopath is beckoning, do not join the game. -BooksInPrint.… (more)

(summary from another edition)

» see all 3 descriptions

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