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Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a…
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Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love (2008)

by Sue Johnson

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Dr. Johnson's book easily wins the "World's Worst Title Ever" award. "Hold Me Tight" qua self-help book title evokes, in this reader, all the wrong associations. Much as does the scent of patchouli oil and as does the sound of gauzy-eyed adults whispering for their inner child to come on out for a good old back rub, "Hold Me Tight" evokes (again, for this reader) scary New Agey associations. For example, "Hold Me Tight" made me recall against my will that Kenny Loggins dumped his first wife in order to marry his colonic therapist. In a nude wedding ceremony. Nude, as in, everybody in attendance, guests and minister (excepting, hopefully, his clerical collar) included, sans sartorial stitch one. Nothing wrong with the concept, I guess, but who wants to see Mr. Danger Zone, singing, nakedly, to his new wife "Cut foot-loo-zah! Cut foot-loo-zah!"

Nothing against the New Age, per se, but everything against Kenny Loggins. That man's music has done way too much harm for him to ever have hope of redemption.

The foregoing may indeed be a strange preamble for the review of a book I thoroughly enjoyed, but I kind of feel like I needed to say what I felt about the title. Because many people who feel like I do about touchy-feely New Age hand-holding might otherwise bypass a truly remarkable and helpful book.

"Hold Me Tight," contrary to whatever negative images or atavistic longings its title triggers, is a phenomenal book. Dr. Johnson is part of the EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy; again, sorry for whatever horrible associations this phrase conjures) movement. EFT espouses spousal connection and intimacy over technical communication proscriptions and mars-venus feelings flowcharts. Unlike most traditional "get along with your spouse" theories, EFT actually works real wonders.

I could go on, but I won't. If you seek to communicate more meaningfully with your spouse, fight your feelings and look past the bad title and read "Hold Me Tight." ( )
  evamat72 | Mar 31, 2016 |
A layman's description of the intricacies of marriage, how to identify troublesome patterns, and what can be done to overcome them. Though Dr. Johnson's re-enactments are seemingly too straight forward her explanations of concepts are not always. For the couple looking to DIY improve their communication this book should be read together and accompanied by note taking. If you still feel in over your head call around for a local family therapist that has also read the book and sign up for sessions. Sometimes Dr. Johnson's words are best supported by a third party that can fill her shoes in the room for you. ( )
  VictoriaBrodersen | Aug 16, 2014 |
This brief but perceptive book gave me new insights into my own history and personality and helped me understand the dynamics of our marriage more cllearly. ( )
  nmele | Apr 6, 2013 |
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To my clients and colleagues, who have helped me to understand love. To my partner, John, and my children, Tim, Emma, and Sarah, who have taught me how to feel it and give it.
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I have always been fascinated by relationships.
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Amazon.com Product Description (ISBN 031611300X, Hardcover)

Heralded by the New York Times and Time magazine as the couple therapy with the highest rate of success, Emotionally Focused Therapy works because it views the love relationship as an attachment bond. This idea, once controversial, is now supported by science, and has become widely popular among therapists around the world.

In Hold me Tight, Dr. Sue Johnson presents Emotionally Focused Therapy to the general public for the first time. Johnson teaches that the way to save and enrich a relationship is to reestablish safe emotional connection and preserve the attachment bond. With this in mind, she focuses on key moments in a relationship-from Recognizing the Demon Dialogue to Revisiting a Rocky Moment-and uses them as touchpoints for seven healing conversations. Through case studies from her practice, illuminating advice, and practical exercises, couples will learn how to nurture their relationships and ensure a lifetime of love.

(retrieved from Amazon Thu, 12 Mar 2015 18:22:28 -0400)

(see all 2 descriptions)

Introduces the author's Emotionally Focused Therapy technique, explaining how to assist couples by treating their relationship as a love-based, attachment bond that can be healed through a reestablishment of safe emotional connections.

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