Amazon.com Amazon.com Review (ISBN 0142004588, Paperback)
If certain movies can earn "two hanky" ratings for their ability to induce tears, Sal Severe's
How to Behave So Your Preschooler Will, Too easily deserves a "two highlighter" rating for its bountiful collection of noteworthy parenting strategies. From the hilarious opening anecdote about his 4-year-old's verbal attack on a waiter to his reassuring final chapter ("From Cookies to Car Keys"), Severe's candor, practical advice, and savvy long-term vision offer quick relief for overwhelmed parents of 3- to 6-year-olds. The moral of this school psychologist's story: Language counts; use it wisely. Yelling, spanking, and knee-jerk time-outs do little to correct misconduct, and may promote more misbehavior. Instead, Severe champions positive, age-appropriate phrases to curb the whining, parry the potty words, and morph fights into sharing sessions. He shows how to formulate meaningful consequences for little rule breakers and how to wield the parents' ultimate "better behavior" tool: consistency. Literally hundreds of clever catch phrases (void of the word
don't), sample dialogues, anger-management techniques, written exercises, and tips on tweaking inadequate corrective measures flow throughout Severe's 25 standalone chapters. An ample book list that offers suggested parent/child reading on dozens of topics nicely caps off this exemplary guide.
--Liane Emory Thomas(retrieved from Amazon Sat, 26 Jan 2013 10:19:56 -0500)
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I purchased "How to Behave" when my eldest was 16 months old and have picked it up again now that she (5) and her brother (3) have reached new developmental stages and developed 'new', not so desirable habits'.
I have found, over the years, that the author is correct; that most of my children's 'behaviors' are the result of my behaviors; essentially what I have `taught' them is permissible behavior. Misbehavior is not something innate in children, it is learned. And it is true, when I see them doing something I dislike, I usually find that it is a variation of something that I have allowed or taught them to do. [Take yelling for example. When my eldest started being `loud', I discovered that I had fallen back into my old habit of yelling.]
In this book though, Dr. Severe outlines not just one, but a number of approaches that a parent can use to resolve misbehaviors. Not only by correcting your own -LOL. And unlike other books, he gives role playing examples with sample dialog and actions so that you know exactly what sort of things you ought to say and do. No trying to guess what the author intent is.
Overall, a very useful and insightful book. But it if you are the sort of person who can't imagine that you *personally* are doing something wrong that is aiding and abetting your child's misbehavior, then this book will probably not help your family.
Four stars - A very good and useful book, minus one star for not being the easiest read.
Pam T~
mom and reviewer at BooksForKids-reviews