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By The Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead…

By The Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead (edition 2010)

by Julie Anne Peters

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4894620,952 (3.83)14
Title:By The Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead
Authors:Julie Anne Peters
Info:Hyperion Book CH (2010), Hardcover, 224 pages
Collections:Your library

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By The Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead by Julie Anne Peters


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I hate how this story has no power over me anymore. A year ago, I would've been swept away by it, but now it just completely fails to move me. ( )
  potterhead9.75 | Jan 5, 2014 |
This book was wonderful and horrible at the same time. It was horrifying to read the bullying that the main character described as she counted down to the day she planned to end her life, but it was also very introspective--for the character, as well as the reader. She describes the assaults and the "teasing" and "taunting" that she had gone through her entire life, but I think that by describing it and writing it out, she managed to also deal with it--or at least start to, because by the end of the book, she seemed more hopeful.

It ends in a very open-ended way, so you don't know if Daelyn went through with the suicide or not. I guess that however you interpret it ends up saying more about you than it does about the book. In a way, I think that the book may encourage the reader to deal with past traumas, but I wouldn't recommend it to anyone who is easily triggered. This book should have a big old "trigger warning" on the cover because it deals with a lot of touchy subjects. ( )
  janersm | Jan 4, 2014 |
A very emotional book - so much so that I'm not able to write a coherent review at this time. Beautifully written, and Daelyn is just spot on for the whole book. I can identify with her so much when I was that age. ( )
  schatzi | Dec 7, 2013 |
I found this a difficult book to categorize. It is essentially a novel that chronicles the systematic suicidal thought processes of a young girl who is bullied at school and is determined to kill herself. Dark stuff, indeed. And while this is riding the current wave of bullying attention, it is also a look into the metal dysfunction of suicidal youths who refuse to see an alternate way out of the misery. It is in many ways too descriptive to be classified as "YA" and yet the author is known for YA and children's books. It works more as a warning to parents to be more attentive to problems with their youth. While certainly not a beach novel, it is an easy read and a good introduction into the psyche of troubled children. ( )
  mldavis2 | Sep 19, 2013 |
"Your failures and your faults. They stick with you. They glob into ugly, cancerous growths inside you and make you want to die." (p.40)

Daelyn Rice has tried to kill herself twice by the age of fifteen. She has spent her entire childhood being bullied and ostracized for being overweight. She suffers from panic attacks, night terrors and claustrophobia. She has never had friends and although her parents are loving she feels they have betrayed her by failing to listen, or help her, instead placing her in situations where she was hurt and humiliated. Her parents have pulled her out of many schools and now she is in an all-girls Catholic school, seeing a therapist and taking anti-depressents. Her parents think she is getting better, even though her last suicide attempt damaged her vocal cords and left her mute, unable to eat whole foods, and wearing a neck brace. She discovers a website called Through-the-Light and begins to research and plan a successful suicide.

Then there's Santana, he's a dorky punk with a pet rat who babbles about the weather. He always meets her at the bench where she waits for her parents to pick her up after school. Daelyn is determined not to feel anything for anyone, but Santana is goofy and persistent in wanting to be her friend. She can't believe he's sincere, though - she knows how cruel boys and girls really are.

There is also Emily. Emily is the fat girl at school that Daeyln used to be, picked on and alone. As Emily keeps reaching out to Daeyln, it triggers conflicting emotions - how she doesn't want to connect, but feels incredible empathy for the other girl.

Daeyln is incredibly realistic, both what she has gone through and her current emotions. The author really knows depression and the self-loathing and inability to connect, open oneself up, or trust, that goes with it. This is an important look into the pain and inner torment that bullied and abused children go through. For anyone who doesn't understand why teenagers commit suicide . . . read this book. By the Time You Read This I'll Be Dead is sober and enlightening and sympathetic. ( )
  catfantastic | Sep 7, 2013 |
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To C.J. Bott for her tireless campaign against bullying
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The white boy, the skinny, tall boy with shocking white hair, sneaks behind the stone bench and leans against the tree trunk.
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(Click to show. Warning: May contain spoilers.)
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High school student Daelyn Rice, who has been bullied throughout her school career and has more than once attempted suicide, again makes plans to kill herself, in spite of the persistent attempts of an unusual boy to draw her out.

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