“Your religion is crazy!”

Growing up the daughter of an infamous Mormon apologist can’t be easy; doubly so when you’re raised in a cloistered, uber-evangelical conservative Mormon community in Provo, Utah. Just ask Martha Nibley Beck, whose now-deceased father Hugh Nibley made a career out of twisting (and sometimes even fudging) the facts for the Mormon church.

In LEAVING THE SAINTS, Beck remembers her child- and young adulthood. One of eight children, Beck and her siblings lived in near-poverty. Though her father was well-respected in Mormon circles, an academic job at Brigham Young University (BYU) is considered “God’s work” – and thus is its own reward, with an appropriately paltry salary. Beck married her husband John at a young age (twenty-one – that’s old maid in Mormon years!), and the two left Provo so that Beck could attend Harvard, where she eventually earned a PhD in sociology. The two returned to Provo after the birth of their second child, Adam, who has Down Syndrome; Beck felt that her choice to have Adam would be met with greater support in Provo. While living in Provo, Beck finished her thesis at Harvard, gave birth to her third child, and took a part-time teaching job at BYU. Within three years, Beck experienced repressed memories of childhood sexual abuse; soldiered through academic repression and intellectual purges at BYU; and, along with her husband, resigned from BYU, left the Mormon church, and fled from Provo. (Though it’s not revealed in LEAVING THE SAINTS, both Mr. and Mrs. Beck later divorced and “came out” as homosexuals.)

Beck’s most contentious claim is that her father sexually abused her from the ages of five to eight. The feminist in me tends to believe women when they say they were sexually assaulted, abused or raped: the rate of false reports of sexual assault are no higher than that of other crimes; the rates of report, investigation, prosecution and conviction in sexual assault cases are notoriously low, i.e., victims are unlikely to report such crimes and, when they do, the likelihood that they’ll find justice is nil; and, finally, such cases are rife with victim-blaming, such that women who report sexual assault are put on trial themselves. Given these circumstances, I find it highly improbable that most women would simply “make up” stories of sexual assault, for whatever reason.

However, I also find recovered memories suspect, particularly if they’re recovered during psychotherapy. Elsewhere, Beck says that, while she did undergo psychotherapy, this was only after her repressed memories began to resurface. Additionally, physical evidence (including extensive vaginal scarring) does point to past trauma. Beck also claims to have elicited a confession of sorts from her mother when she initially told her of the abuse. Unlike the childhood memories of sexual abuse, it’s unlikely that Beck’s mind manufactured this memory; so either she’s lying or she isn’t. Though her mother later recanted, this might be easily explained both by Mormon culture and the fact that Mrs. Nibley is wholly dependent on her husband for support.

Whether you believe Beck’s recovered memories to be real or not, LEAVING THE SAINTS is nevertheless a fascinating look at the Mormon religion and culture. Unlike older religions like Christianity and Islam, Mormonism is so young that it’s been documented – extensively - in modern history. Contemporary news reports reveal founder Joseph Smith as a con artist and fraud, and his own accounts of church teachings and personal revelations show that he was also an egotist and philanderer. For this reason, I find Mormonism (and similar “young” “religions” like Scientology) remarkably interesting. (Full disclosure: I’m a heathen vegan feminist.)

Most of the exposes I’ve read previously have focused on fundamentalist, breakaway Mormon sects which still practice plural marriages (see, for example, Jon Krakauer’s UNDER THE BANNER OF HEAVEN). In contrast, LEAVING THE SAINTS looks at mainstream Mormonism – and reveals it to be just as wacky, dysfunctional and misogynist as the excommunicated cults. For example, Beck’s account of a women’s forum held at BYU, which she moderated shortly before leaving the church, is jaw-dropping – and actually has one Mormon scholar blaming children for their own sexual abuse!

Beck recounts her journey – leaving the saints and finding her faith – in a series of flashbacks, interspersed with a conversation/confrontation she had with her elderly father in a hotel room shortly before writing LEAVING THE SAINTS. Beck is a master story teller, and though the reader can posit a guess early on as to the source of Beck’s trauma, the details are no less surprising once Beck’s repressed memories come flooding back with ferocity. As an atheist, I had some trouble relating to Beck’s spiritual journey, but these sections are written beautifully, and non-practicing religious/New Age readers will no doubt enjoy Beck’s quest for a more intrinsic, less prescribed sort of faith.

(Crossposted on Amazon.) ( )

The faithful Latter-day Saints do not read unapproved material and Leaving The Saints is not on the approved list, according to its author, Martha Beck. Ms. Beck has an axe to grind, but writes with an authoritative stone.

Quoting from the back cover:

As "Mormon royalty" within the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Martha Beck was raised in a home frequented by the Church's high elders in an existence framed by the strictest code of conduct . . . Most troubling of all, she was forced to face her history of sexual abuse by one of the Church's most prominent authorities."

Leaving The Saints is a troubling story. Truth like an onion with layers upon layers, can bring tears. Ms. Beck has cried a river in her struggle to find the truth. ( )

Interesting and compelling from several perspectives: feminism, Mormonism, spirituality vs organized religion. In addition, Beck displays a lively sense of humor even when discussing such difficult topics. HIghly recommended. ( )

As one fascinated by all things Mormon, I found this memoir about growing up the daughter of a famous LDS apologist to be a captivating look at life in a culture that's pretty foreign to my own experience. Beck writes with great humor and insight about a difficult childhood and recovering memories of being sexually abused by her father, and she succeeds in putting it all in perspective within the Church's culture and overall influence.

Full review at The Book Lady's Blog . ( )

You know I think she had more than enough dirt on her Dad without including the incest. And the whole 'sometimes silence is a lie' thing. It certainly is suspicious that she didn't mention that the memories surfaced during hypnosis. And what's with not being openly homosexual?

I just don't see how the incest had anything to do with her leaving the church. And don't modern day people find it extremely quaint that anyone would look for God in a house of worship? I think her son was right, God is in pizza. My goodness! Isn't finding the histroy of the LDS to be such hogwash enough reason to disance yourself from them?

I really could identify with her in her other books but not this one. Thank goodness I chose the parents I did. To paraphrase Joss Weydon talking about his movie 'Serenity' 'whenever you try to create a utopia there's bound to be something ugly underneath it.'

I wish Martha Beck well and was rather astonished how much this book resembled 'Eat, Pray, Love' why was the second book such a commercial success and not this one?