Lisa F Cook

This memoir of a self-described pampered Jewish American Princess who marries the man of her dreams and immediately moves to Japan for his two year teaching job is an interesting look at culture clash and the sometimes difficult adjustment to married life. Cook is generally light and flippant about her experiences in Japan although she does touch on a few deeper issues here and there, mentioning the treatment and perception of women, the anti-Semitic movement in Japan, the evolution of show more long-standing friendships, and the every day challenge of living with another person.

Separated into sections headed by generally mundane domestic tasks, Cook uses the challenges she faced doing laundry in a small, ineffective, and completely foreign washing machine, shopping in the overwhelming, neon-lit shops, and mastering public transportation, to name just a few, to highlight her ex-pat experience. Her frustrations with tackling things differently than she is used to comes through the text loud and clear. And she is not only having to learn all of this in a foreign country where she doesn't speak the language, but she has to come to a sense of acceptance of herself as the person who will cook, clean, and sew. Eventually she does take on a group of Japanese women for English conversation lessons, teaches at a school, and gives well-received speeches but she never seems particularly happy living in Japan, not even allowing herself to open up completely for friendship with the one fellow teacher who shares her interest in films.

As much of an adjustment as it was for this tall blond woman to move to Japan, sticking out like a sore thumb, it is as much of an adjustment for her to adjust to married life. She doesn't think to call her husband when she is going to be very, very late, not understanding how frantic that will make him. They argue about how they will spend their money, cash or credit. But these and other petty squabbles are learning experiences that serve to make them closer in the end.

Also woven throughout the narrative is Cook's friendship with her best friend at home and the changes that it undergoes with the two of them living so far apart. In many of the exchanges between the two, Cook comes off as fairly self-centered, unhappy with living in Japan and wanting to vent but not reciprocating when her friend needs to discuss her shaky marriage or her own unhappiness.

Cook does grow as a person throughout this first year of their planned two years in Japan although I never did get the impression that she much liked Japan or the Japanese people. She connected with a few people but never more than superficially. And while she understood that she was trying to impose her idea of correct behaviour and cultural norms on them (as they were on her), there was never a sense that she came to understand and accept their norms as different but equal to hers. Her adjustment to marriage was a much smoother path and one more flexible in terms of give and take. Her husband, who had lived abroad before, seemed very understanding and compassionate with regard to all the life changes being thrown at her at once.

Overall this was a fast and mildly entertaining book. There were some cliches offered and some awkward transitions in the middle of the chapters but in general, for those readers not looking for an in depth exploration of Japanese culture or of a Western experience in Japan, most people will find this a light and fun read. show less

I was so excited when my review copy of JAPAN TOOK THE J.A.P. OUT OF ME by Lisa Fineberg Cook arrived. As an armchair traveler, I love reading about people's experiences in other countries, the more exotic the better. And the twist of this memoir -- that the author, a self-described Jewish American Princess loses her royal crown while living abroad -- promised to make this book an entertaining read.

I'm happy to say that I was not disappointed. In fact, I appreciated this memoir on a level I show more totally did not anticipate. I really didn't expect that I would ever be able to identify with anyone who would be described as a "princess," but I found that many of the author's reactions to her foreign circumstances were not so foreign to me! For example, I hate being the center of attention and feeling that all eyes are on me, especially out in public. Most of the time I tell myself that no one is really paying attention to me and just get on with my business. After all, no one likes being stared at. But for our intrepid Princess Lisa, all eyes really ARE on her! As a tall blond woman in a world of small dark-haired people, she becomes something of a spectacle just by stepping outside her door. Spoiled she may be, but this sort of celebrity attention is not something she is used to or desires.

For all her whining about having to figure out how to do her own laundry and cooking and being reduced to using public transportation, Princess Lisa plunges in and carries on. During her first year in Japan, she actually confronts several versions of culture shock: the most obvious is as an American living in a foreign country with it's different viewpoints and customs. Secondly, this is also her first year of marriage, and that requires adjustments and compromises in an uncharted territory that would challenge anyone. And thirdly, she discovers the vast landscape of her own character. In the past, she may have enjoyed her pampered existence, but she takes pride in learning to fend for herself -- and laugh at herself.

JAPAN TOOK THE J.A.P. OUT OF ME was an enjoyable read and a fun little escape. I enjoyed the author's light writing style and her ability to poke fun at herself. And if she sometimes sounds childish in her complaints about the lifestyle she has taken on, she also possesses an almost childlike wonder and ability to have fun.

"Tokyo rocks. I love it. Everything moves incredibly fast and the lights and sounds collide colorfully, creating a kind of benevolent Blade Runner atmosphere. It happens to be raining this weekend, which adds to the allure as live-action billboards glisten throughout the Ginza district. When we come to the famous four corners crosswalk, which is as wide and long as an L.A. city park, we stand on the curb for several minutes waiting for the light to change, and I look at the bright neon puddles and smile at my husband." p. 79

I want to read more from this author -- what was her second year in Japan like? How did she adjust to life back in the States? What is her life like now? Oops! Am I staring? show less

Review:
Funny and engaging, Japan Took the J.A.P. Out of Me: The True Story of a Domesticated Princess reads like a mix of chicklit, travelogue, and memoir. The book is arranged chronologically and into the six main areas of culture shock: Laundry, Cooking, Transportation, Shopping, Cleaning and Intermission.

Lisa Fineberg Cook doesn't pull any punches - she is as harsh towards herself as she is to her new acquaintances, which makes for an entertaining narrative. We learn of her frustration show more and isolation as she is constantly stared at, described as Meg Ryan, and is treated, albeit politely, as an outsider. As she learns to navigate the city of Nagoya and finds her own friends, we enjoy the moments of triumph as Lisa wins the respect and affection of those around her. As to be expected in books of this nature, Lisa becomes more of a sympathetic character as she learns to adjust to the world around her.

I thoroughly enjoyed Japan Took the J.A.P. Out of Me: The True Story of a Domesticated Princess. I recommend this book highly. It'll likely be particularly hilarious to people interested in Japan or those who have moved overseas or those who have had to adjust to a new environment (most of us!).

Publisher: Downtown Press; 1 edition (October 20, 2009), 288 pages.
Review copy provided by the publisher. show less

Lisa Fineberg Cook’s Japan Took The J.A.P. Out of Me is an entertaining look at one Type-A woman’s quest to make the most of a foreign experience. Peter’s new teaching post means Lisa must leave behind her L.A.-based friendships, family and work for the year they’re abroad. As someone addicted to her regular primping sessions, lunch dates and hobnobbing, Lisa’s introduction to Japanese culture is a little rocky. She doesn’t speak the language, for one, and as a tall, blonde show more American? Well, let’s just say attracts her fair share of attention. Cook isn’t prepared for the onslaught of changes, but eventually attempts to make the most of her time away outside the U.S.

Despite the skewering it’s taken, I have to tell you: I really liked this book. It was my constant companion in the days until I finished it, and I loved Cook’s glimpses at a culture so entirely different from my American way of life. Broken down into chapters regarding seemingly “simple” tasks, like laundry and eating out, Cook’s battles to master things that came naturally in the U.S. really got me thinking. I’ve traveled a bit in other countries and love peeking at how others live, but to actually move there? It was brave. And bold. And really cool.

Does Lisa occasionally act like a spoiled brat? Sure. Does her pinched-nose annoyance with foreign culture become grating? Sometimes. It’s hard to believe someone so averse to living abroad actually moves abroad, but hey — we all do crazy things for love. And Lisa makes no bones about the way she feels for Peter, even getting into the nitty-gritty of doing “dirty” American things in their Japanese living arrangements. We know they’re in love and they’re going to thrive or fall together. I liked the vulnerable parts of their nacent marriage she let us see, and I loved that she never tried to be perfect — or describe it that way.

And here’s what makes Lisa a likable heroine: she’s aware of her faults and doesn’t take herself too seriously. Though some have deemed it "shallow," I gently beg to differ: Cook is a self-proclaimed J.A.P. (Jewish American Princess), so her misadventures on public transportation and fending for herself in a world where everything is foreign takes on extra meaning. She admits she’s been spoiled and sheltered. And she’s trying to change that. Maybe it takes a while, but that was all right with me. I was invested — and along for the ride.

If you’re looking for a deep look at life for expatriates doin’ their thing in Nagoya, this probably isn’t for you. Lisa is often more interested in finding a good hairdresser and manicurist than becoming culturally enriched, but that didn’t bother me. She does offer insights into Japanese culture through an American lens, though they were pretty superficial. Still, I found her hilarious and charming, and Japan Took The J.A.P. Out of Me was a delightful read.

For chick lit lovers and armchair travelers, this is one delicious bento box of fun. (Mmmm, bento.) show less