Walter de la Mare (1873–1956)

The fictional introduction to these fictional memoirs promises an account of a remarkable woman, of keen intellect, whose travels and experiences are such a marvel that they must be shared via publication.

What are we delivered? A single year in the life of this woman. During this year, her twentieth, she loses her parents and her home; is set up with a livable income and provided a home-for-life as a boarder; becomes a spoiled pet of the bored nobility; and finally, joins the circus for three nights to earn enough money to return to her life as a boarder. Throughout this, she treats those around her with contempt or at least disrespect, living the life of a privileged shut-in. We are, in summary, offered no evidence of a keen intellect nor of a remarkable personality, and the travels and experiences of a shut-in are neither extensive or interesting.

Oh, and the woman is a midget. Not an actual midget or little-person or insufficiently-altitudinous or whatever the proper term might be, but a scale model of an attractive woman, about two feet high.… (more)

Not sure what to say about this one. It's unclear whether de la Mare is intentionally being funny, or is deadly serious about absurd things.

A good example is the tale about the lecturer, who gives a fifteen minute (and possibly twice as many pages) talk on Edgar Allen Poe, followed by an afterword from the guy who invited him to lecture. After the talk breaks up, the ghost of Poe shows up to argue a rebuttal with the lecturer. After all this tedium is said and done, and the ghost is gone, the lecturer thinks: Did Poe change my view of his work? No, what he said agrees with what I thought of it. Did he change my unfavorable view of him as a person? No, in fact, now I hate him rather than merely dislike him.

Amusing to relate in just a few sentences, but long and quite tedious and decidedly un-funny in de la Mare's telling.

There's a lot more like that, in particular turns of phrase which are awkward or jarring, and while entertaining to the jaded reader, they likely were not intended to be. I highlighted a bunch of examples on the kindle while reading, but really, this book is not worth taking the trouble to include them.

The greatest weakness of this collection is undoubtedly de la Mare's storytelling ability. It is unclear where most of these meandering tales are going, and once they get there, it is uncertain where one has ended up. This sounds like good psychological horror, but it's not. The reader is left thinking, "Did anything actually happen? Because he didn't describe anything happening. Why did he bother telling this story at all?" In short, you really gotta dig to find anything supernatural in most of these stories, and bereft of that, they have little else to recommend them.… (more)