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Cherishment: A Psychology of the Heart

by Elisabeth Young-Bruehl

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"Cher-ish-ment," n. F. "cher," dear. Sweet, indulgent love, esp. of children. Emotional equivalent of nourishment; soul food. What the world needs now. Elisabeth Young-Bruehl and Faith Bethelard give a name to the kind, warm, tender, and affectionate love that babies expect before they can speak of it and that we all desire our whole lives long. As adults, they note, we all desire our whole lives long. As adults, they note, we don't often acknowledge or even understand our need for this "cherishment." Their book is a rare effort to explore that need, to create a "psychology of the heart." In "Cherishment," Young-Bruehl and Bethelard provide a wholly original way of thinking about familiar concepts such as love, attachment, and care, showing how deep-seated disappointments and fears of dependency keep so many of us from forming healthy relationships. Questioning the traditional, celebratory view of independence and self-reliance, they argue that cherishment is the emotional foundation,formed in childhood, that sustains all kinds of growth-promoting adult bonds. Blending the philosophical writing that has won Young-Bruehl i… (more)
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Young-Bruehl and Faith Bethelard have written this work “about a basic human need-the need for affection, the kind of love we call ‘cherishment’.” As therapists (Young-Bruehl is Anna Freud’s biographer), the two have written this work both for professionals and lay persons. They develop the Eastern concept of amae (pioneered by T. Doi) into their notion of cherishment, in an attempt to describe a universal desire and expectation to be loved. They take this need through infancy and adolescence, drawing on examples which are both interesting as well as illustrative from their own therapeutic work with patients. I read about two-thirds of the work, and skimmed the rest. ( )
  MiserableLibrarian | Dec 31, 2007 |
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"Cher-ish-ment," n. F. "cher," dear. Sweet, indulgent love, esp. of children. Emotional equivalent of nourishment; soul food. What the world needs now. Elisabeth Young-Bruehl and Faith Bethelard give a name to the kind, warm, tender, and affectionate love that babies expect before they can speak of it and that we all desire our whole lives long. As adults, they note, we all desire our whole lives long. As adults, they note, we don't often acknowledge or even understand our need for this "cherishment." Their book is a rare effort to explore that need, to create a "psychology of the heart." In "Cherishment," Young-Bruehl and Bethelard provide a wholly original way of thinking about familiar concepts such as love, attachment, and care, showing how deep-seated disappointments and fears of dependency keep so many of us from forming healthy relationships. Questioning the traditional, celebratory view of independence and self-reliance, they argue that cherishment is the emotional foundation,formed in childhood, that sustains all kinds of growth-promoting adult bonds. Blending the philosophical writing that has won Young-Bruehl i

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