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The 2,548 Best Things Anybody Ever Said (1996)

by Robert Byrne

Series: 637 best things said (1-4)

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7351230,721 (3.43)7
Drawing from diverse personages from Goethe to Churchill to Woody Allen, The 2,548 Best Things Anybody Ever Said is a witty wise quotation collection that deserves a special place on every humor lover's bookshelf. These unique, funny, and outrageous quotations, previously published in four separate volumes, are now gathered together in a seemingly limitless trove of pithy and often irreverent one-liners, retorts, put-downs, jokes, and last words that cover every conceivable subject and will appeal to every taste. Highlights include: --W. C. Fields: "Start every day with a smile and get it over with." --George Burns:" "Happiness is having a large loving family in another city." And many more.… (more)
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» See also 7 mentions

Showing 1-5 of 14 (next | show all)
With quotes like:
"Masquerading as a normal person day after day is exhausting."
and
"I think, therefore I'm single" -Liz Winston
this was a fun read.
However, it was definitely more adult than I would like and it was so cleverly full of itself that I was almost fed up with it at the end. Also, it didn't have page numbers which, oddly, bugged me. ( )
  OutOfTheBestBooks | Sep 24, 2021 |
Seriously annoying pagination.
  ClearShax | Jul 28, 2021 |
I enjoyed the companion piece by the author, The 2548 Best Things Anyone Ever Said a bit more. I like to collect aphorisms and was hoping to collect a few hundred or more. Listed below are some aphorisms that caught my eye and tickled my brain:

A man on a date wonders if he’ll get lucky. The woman already knows. —Monica Piper

In America, sex is an obsession—elsewhere it’s a fact. —Marlene Dietrich (1901–1992)

Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near. —Helen Rowland (1875–1950)

The idea of using Viagra at my age is like erecting a new flagpole in front of a condemned building. —Harvey Korman (1927–2008) at age seventy

My troubles don’t come from chasing women. They begin when I catch them. —John Barrymore

A man is as faithful as his options. —Bill Maher

I won’t insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said. William F. Buckley ( )
  writemoves | Jun 17, 2019 |
As with most books of quotations, this one is not quite as wonderful as it believes. Some of these quotations honestly belong among the best things anyone ever said ("Shut up, he explained" or “Nebraska is proof that Hell is full, and the dead walk the Earth.” for examples). Most of them, however, are banal and not that great. Overall, a fun, quick read, but not even close to sublime. And the author should really have thought twice before he included his own quotes; that's the surest way to brand yourself much less of a wit than you imagine yourself to be, and a bit full of yourself, too, including yourself in a book of quotes containing H. L. Mencken, Mark Twain, Oscar Wilde, and Yogi Berra, among others. ( )
  Devil_llama | May 27, 2017 |
This book does not contain the 2,548 best things anybody ever said. I'm not sure it even comes close, actually. But it's not bad either. ( )
  AmandaL. | Jan 16, 2016 |
Showing 1-5 of 14 (next | show all)
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Many of the best things ever said were, in fact, written. (Introduction)
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Drawing from diverse personages from Goethe to Churchill to Woody Allen, The 2,548 Best Things Anybody Ever Said is a witty wise quotation collection that deserves a special place on every humor lover's bookshelf. These unique, funny, and outrageous quotations, previously published in four separate volumes, are now gathered together in a seemingly limitless trove of pithy and often irreverent one-liners, retorts, put-downs, jokes, and last words that cover every conceivable subject and will appeal to every taste. Highlights include: --W. C. Fields: "Start every day with a smile and get it over with." --George Burns:" "Happiness is having a large loving family in another city." And many more.

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