This is actually a review of the Blinkist summary of Supercommunicators so not entirely fair to the original author. However, it's a way for me to get through a large number of books and identify those where I would really like to read the original. Unfortunately, Supercommunicators does not fall into this class. Maybe there is a lot more in the full book but I found the summary version to be rather simplistic. Yes int gave some reasonable suggestions like: prepare for your conversations....though this seems to imply that the conversation CAN be planned for when, in meh experience, most conversations just happen and you don't get time to prepare. Duhigg seems to assume that the conversations are going to be deep and meaningful or are work conversations with a non-performing employee. Ok you can prepare for these and some of the suggestions are probably valid....like "ask open ended questions" or "what made you choose this career". Also, as with most books of this self-help genre ...it is clearly directed at an American audience ...and even the "personal Conversations section seems to relate to being racially sensitive...whereas elsewhere in the world (such as Malaysia) you may be dealing with complex racial and religious issues simultaneously.
I extracted a few sections that resonated with me as follows:
What’s in it for me? Transform your conversations into meaningful connections.
In this book summary you’ll delve into the art and science of becoming a supercommunicator. You’ll unlock the secrets to mastering the three types of conversations that emerge as the building blocks of meaningful connections–each of which plays a crucial role in how you relate to others and shapes your experiences and outcomes, in both personal and professional settings. Specifically, you’ll discover how to navigate the intricacies of practical conversations that focus on decision-making, emotional conversations that delve into feelings, and social conversations that explore identity and relationships.
Ultimately, your aim is to engage in “learning conversations,” seeking to understand the viewpoints of those around you while also sharing your own perspective. Recognizing and matching the conversation type is a key skill
Your journey starts with grasping the nuances of the three core conversation types: practical, emotional, and social.
Practical conversations revolve around decision-making and problem-solving, concentrating on the logistics required to reach specific objectives. Emotional conversations, meanwhile, offer a platform for people to voice their feelings and find empathy–deepening connections on a personal level. And social conversations probe into identities and relationships, exploring how individuals view themselves and interact with others across different social landscapes.
During meaningful conversations, your brain can align with your partner’s, synchronizing your thoughts and physiological reactions–like your heartbeat and breathing patterns. This kind of neurological sync underscores the power of communication,
In order to become a supercommunicator, you need to align your brain’s activity with that of others.
Asking yourself, Why am I speaking? will clarify your goals and ensure that your approach is aligned with the needs of everyone involved.
this is the essence of Duhigg’s first rule of learning conversations: “Pay attention to what kind of conversation is occurring.”
Active listening is another key component of fostering deeper connections. Demonstrate that you’re truly engaged by nodding, maintaining eye contact, and paraphrasing what has been shared.
Further enrich your conversations by asking open-ended questions that prompt more than simple yes or no answers.
Sharing your own experiences and emotions, when the situation warrants, can also deepen the connection. Reciprocal sharing creates a stronger bond between you and your conversation partner, fostering an environment where both of you feel comfortable opening up more freely.
Practical conversations
Understanding the essence of practical conversations–conversations that ask, What is this really about?–is essential if you want to effectively engage in meaningful discussions.....Take time to think about potential topics, formulate questions, and consider what you wish to express.
A powerful way to deepen engagement is to start with open-ended questions that probe into beliefs, judgments, or experiences. Questions like, “How did you choose your career?” invite participants to share more than just facts;
To keep the conversation flowing, stay attuned to both verbal and nonverbal cues. Engagement signals like nodding, verbal affirmations, or changes in body language provide feedback on a participant’s interest level or disconnect,
“Share your goals, and ask what others are seeking.” This principle of mutual transparency fosters an environment where all participants are aligned in their objectives, making the conversation beneficial for everyone involved.
To enrich your conversations, experiment by adding new topics or perspectives.
Negotiation within conversations isn’t about asserting dominance but rather about reaching mutual understanding.
Emotional conversations
Starting this type of conversation requires showing genuine interest in what’s really going on behind the facade, highlighted by Duhigg’s third rule of a learning conversation: “Ask about others’ feelings, and share your own.”.....Unlike surface-level inquiries, deep questions probe into the experiences, beliefs, and emotions of others, inviting them to share more profound aspects of themselves. This sharing of vulnerabilities can bridge gaps, revealing the common humanity that binds you and the other person together, even in disagreement......Today, online communication introduces additional challenges, as the absence of nonverbal cues can easily lead to misinterpretations. To mitigate this, be explicitly polite, express gratitude, and refrain from public criticism in order to maintain a respectful and constructive exchange in your online discussions.
Social conversations
Or who are we? conversations–begin with recognizing these moments and embracing the opportunity to dive into the rich tapestry of our social identities. It’s about creating a space where your background, experiences, and beliefs aren’t just welcomed but are central to the dialogue.....Transitioning into this type of conversation with intention is key, as underscored by Duhigg’s fourth rule of learning conversations: “Explore if identities are important to this discussion.” This rule is about thoughtful preparation and establishing a framework that promotes respect and inclusivity from the start......In preparing for difficult conversations, it’s essential to understand what you want to discuss and what you hope to achieve. Start by thinking about the main points. For instance, if you’re planning to talk about team dynamics, identify specific examples where you’ve observed positive or negative interactions. This direct approach helps keep the conversation focused and relevant.
To keep the discussion productive, plan how to respond calmly and constructively. But preparation isn’t just about what you want to say. It also involves being ready to listen.
Final summary
Mastering practical, emotional, and social conversations is key to transforming your interactions into meaningful connections. You can enhance your communication skills by adhering to the four rules of learning conversations–paying attention to the type of conversation, sharing goals, inquiring about feelings, and exploring identities. Active listening, asking open-ended questions, and sharing personal experiences will also empower you to foster more authentic connections.
Yes: it's ok but I'm rather glad that I focussed on the summary and didn't spend a whole lot of time digesting the original. Two stars from me. ( )

Yes an important, revealing and useful book. Easily worth a 5. But it loops around and around with explanatory case histories before finally getting back to reinforce and restate the case already made. Felt like I was being talked down to, not thought capable of absorbing much higher density of information flow. So it dragged me through silently screaming, I got it, Ive really got it. Just let me loop back to you and tell you in my words "I have got it" - just another case point along the way. ( )