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Messy Beautiful Friendship: Finding and Nurturing Deep and Lasting Relationships

by Christine Hoover

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921297,431 (3.5)None
Women long for deep and lasting friendships but often find them challenging to make. The private angst they feel regarding friendship often translates into their own insecurity and isolation. Christine Hoover offers women a fresh, biblical vision for friendship that allows for the messiness of our lives and the realities of our schedules. She shows women - what's holding them back from developing satisfying friendships - how to make and deepen friendships - how to overcome insecurity, self-imposed isolation, and past hurts - how to embrace the people God has already placed in their lives as potential friends - and how to revel in the beauty and joy of everyday friendship. With stories of real friendships and guidance drawn from Scripture, Hoover encourages women to intentionally and purposefully invest in one of the most rewarding relationships God has given us.… (more)
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I agreed with much of what the author said in the book, and I think that for women who have never seriously contemplated the importance, purpose, and challenges of friendship, this will be a very helpful read. Even for those who have considered it before, this will likely serve as a good reminder.

Hoover addresses some issues that are difficult to swallow, such as: friends don't always come "packaged" the way we want them to; one friend cannot be our everything; our friends will hurt us and we will hurt them and we need to address these conflicts rather than ignore them; as Christians, we need to call out sin in the lives of close friends and be willing to hear constructive criticism from others.

Having said that, I had a hard time connecting with Hoover's writing style. She writes with a vague, intuitive quality; often, her "examples" are not very specific and detailed, which is something my brain needs in order to make connections. I don't just want to hear that her friend was hurt and that they made up... I want to know what happened, why the friend was hurt, which words were spoken to wound and to heal... I want the whole story!

I found the book lacking on the topic of making friends. Hoover believes that if a person initiates enough and does "all the right things," they will naturally attract friends. She doesn't really address the fact that others may never respond or reciprocate. Even God, the perfect friend, is rejected all of the time, so how much more true will it be for us, who are imperfect despite our best efforts to improve?

I do think many women will learn from and be encouraged by this book, but it wasn't my personal favorite.

I received this book from the publisher via NetGalley. ( )
  RachelRachelRachel | Nov 21, 2023 |
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Women long for deep and lasting friendships but often find them challenging to make. The private angst they feel regarding friendship often translates into their own insecurity and isolation. Christine Hoover offers women a fresh, biblical vision for friendship that allows for the messiness of our lives and the realities of our schedules. She shows women - what's holding them back from developing satisfying friendships - how to make and deepen friendships - how to overcome insecurity, self-imposed isolation, and past hurts - how to embrace the people God has already placed in their lives as potential friends - and how to revel in the beauty and joy of everyday friendship. With stories of real friendships and guidance drawn from Scripture, Hoover encourages women to intentionally and purposefully invest in one of the most rewarding relationships God has given us.

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