First of two parter, with "Love, Etc." Use of unreliable, multi narrator dialog, an urbane Roshomon. Could have been edited down more. Unlikeable characters (except for Madame Wyatt) demonstrate the way we invent our lives and the lives of others, the pointlessness and inevitability of wishing others were capable of change (read: different than they truly are) so that we could love them better -- so that we could love ourselves better. Damaged people damaging other damaged people. Reviews a bit over the top. ( )

Thanks Oly Shipp for the loan! I very much enjoyed it, though it's a rare occasion for me of understanding what people mean when they say they don't relate to any of the characters. But handsomely written and cleverly conceived. ( )

I really liked this. I like the structure and the different perspectives. I kind of felt like a shrink with those three people coming to see me and tell me their stories. And offering me a cigarette, thinking that I would've declined and then being mad about it. Barnes is so funny.

I'm glad I've borrowed the sequel from the library so I'll get on to it. ( )

I had a bit of a love-hate relationship with this book. In the end I came away from the reading experience still not sure how I felt about it. There's a character in the book - Oliver - who is always talking in a joking manner, and I think I confused this character's behaviour with the author's intent, thinking that the author was trying to write a funny book. Actually, I don't think that's the case at all. In fact Oliver can be seen as a rather sad individual. Indeed, all the main characters can be seen as sad. Certainly they develop quite a degree of cynicism. The other main male character, Stuart, says:

"My wife let me down, my best friend let me down, it was only my character and my bloody tendency to feel guilt that made me not see this before. They let me down. And so I formulated a principle. I don't know if you follow rugby, but some years ago there was a famous saying in the game: Get your retaliation in first. And now the way I live my life is according to this principle: Get your disappointment in first. Disappoint them before they disappoint you." (p.226)

In connection with love and marriage, Stuart concludes: "Money can't buy you love? Oh yes it can. And as I say, love is just a system for getting someone to call you Darling after sex." (p. 234)

The wife, Gillian, (wife first to Stuart and then to Oliver) acquires a pragmatic approach:
"It's unfair? What's fair? When did fair have much to do with the way we run our lives? There's no time to think about that. I just have to get on with it." (p.266).

The book ends with Gillian implementing a plan. The reasoning behind the plan, and the longer term outcome of its implementation were not at all clear to me. Perhaps Barnes is just trying to coerce us to buy the sequel, "Love, etc."? One LT reviewer commented that the sequel, too, left the reader up in the air and he/she wondered whether there was a third book in the series. I'm not sure that Barnes's plan will be successful in my case. Watch this space. ( )

yep they sure talked it over ( )