Sharon Brous

Most people have been in a situation in which someone they know is hurting but they don’t know what to say, so they don’t go. Other times they show up, but again don’t know what to say or do .
In the amen effect, Sharon Brous provides easy to understand and use situations and examples, many from her rabbinical practice, of what to do and what not to do.
The most important thing is to show up. It is not good to be alone. After a death, for example, the mourners may not remember what was show more said, but they remember who was there.
She writes about the importance of meeting your neighbors. People tend to associate with people who they either have known for a long time or with whom they can identify. It’s important to get to know people with other perspectives. Sometimes, you may find out your neighbor and you have much in common.
Browse also recommends recognizing the divine in every person and finding joy where you can.
Let people know when you need help. Be honest about how you feel. If you need something, be specific. For instance, someone offers to bring food or take you somewhere, let them know exactly what you need.
When someone is willing to talk with you, be willing to listen, really listen. Hear what they are they’re saying, not what you want to hear or tell them.
When you meet new people, possibly a gathering, ask them who they are or what brings them there instead of asking questions such as what they do for a living.
I’ve been a volunteer guardian for many years. One of my first wards was in a VA hospital. He later transferred to a nursing home. He had no visitors. He never spoke, but he was aware of what was happening. I was with him when he died. I knew he was religious and spent the hours reading psalms to him. Eventually, I stopped talking and was just there. I realize now I should have touched him, held his hand, just let him know that he was not alone as he died.
THE AMEN EFFECT is well written, use to do when people are in need as well as presenting examples of what not to do. show less

From one of our country’s most prominent rabbis, an inspiring book about the power of community based on one of her most impactful sermons.