Smut: Two Unseemly Stories

Naughty was never so nice

I’m a fan of Alan Bennett’s wonderful plays, but my greatest affection is reserved for his charming novella The Uncommon Reader. Coming in at a slight 160 pages, Smut is similar in length, but this book is made up of two brief stories. In content, they have nothing in common with that earlier tale, but they exhibit the same trademark humor and warmth. This is a writer it’s difficult not to like. Therefore, it may be surprising to hear that Mr. Bennett is writing Smut. These tales are about sex—at least in part. And though it’s been years since I read them, these stories remind me of nothing so much as the “adult” stories of Roald Dahl.

The first and longer of the two stories was my favorite. “The show more Greening of Mrs. Donaldson” involves a middle-aged widow who supplements her income by acting out symptoms for medical students to diagnose. There’s much more to it, of course, but half the pleasure here is in the discovery. The other half of the pleasure is the loveable and very human Mrs. Donaldson. And then the third half of the pleasure is the gentle humor.

I didn’t like the characters in “The Shielding of Mrs. Forbes” quite as much, but they weren’t meant to be as likable. The vain Graham Forbes has several secrets he’s keeping from his new wife, but it turns out she has an agenda of her own.

Despite Bennett’s natural sweetness, these stories really do discuss sexual matters in a very frank and adult manner. Nonetheless, I wouldn’t describe them as graphic. I wouldn’t hesitate to recommend The Uncommon Reader to anyone who’s ever loved a book. I won’t be recommending Smut quite as unreservedly. I think more open-minded readers will enjoy these stories the most. But I enjoyed them immensely, and I do recommend them. show less

Two delightful and very Bennettian short stories, each of which is best read in one go. Goodness knows what non-Brits make of them!

They are not very smutty and not very plausible, but they are great fun. As with many of his works, a combination of repressed feelings (not all of them sexual) and respectability hide thoughts, feelings and actions that may seem out of character, but are actually fundamental to who the person is. And yet the characters do not, initially at least, realise what they hide, "The closest she got to pretence was politeness."

The first story concerns a widow. With typical ironic understatement, Bennett compares a colleague's excitement over a camcorder, with her husband, who "had been prey to similar passing show more technological fancies which were equally jealously guarded... all of which his death had liberated for her promiscuous deployment, being that she no longer had to play the little woman." Ouch! Promiscuous deployment of a lawnmower seems somehow smuttier than any of the sex.

Anyway, the widow discovers a prurient side to herself, and that changes her. "Seldom having had much of a secret before... Mrs Donaldson was surprised at how strong the impulse was to share it, or at least to share the secret that she had one to share." There is always a current of pain and regret in Bennett.

The second story concerns different double-life scenarios. Mentions of a mobile phone and the internet make it firmly modern(ish), but everything else (including a 20-something called Betty) put it at least 30 years earlier.

Still, with lines like these, it really doesn't matter:

"His wife was often taken for a widow. She had so much the air of a woman who was coping magnificently, that a husband still extant took people by surprise."

The old, train-loving vicar's version of the facts of life "relied heavily on the piston, the furnace and the eccentric rod, helpful did one want to travel from London to Darlington but no preparation for the rigours of modern marriage". show less

SMUT. What a great title, don'cha think? It's a word I used to hear from my mother years ago - smut, smutty - but you don't hear much anymore. It was - and, I assume, still is - usually associated with nasty, even pornographic, books or films, but could also apply to personal behavior. Everyone needs at least a smidgen of smut in their lives - to spice things up a bit. And that's what Alan Bennett's two long-ish short stories in SMUT are about. In the first, "The Greening of Mrs Donaldson," the title character is a fifty-ish, still attractive widow, who, to help make ends meet, takes in a couple of student roomers, and also answers an ad to work at the local hospital's medical school as an SP (simulated patient) -

"No special skills were show more said to be required, only the ability to memorise information and present it clearly. Nothing was said in the advert about acting ability, or Mrs Donaldson would not have applied; self-confidence wasn't mentioned either, which would have been another deterrent as Mrs Donaldson had always thought of herself as shy."

In the course of the story, through the actions of her two young tenants, as well as the medical students and their physician-instructor, Mrs Donaldson 'loosens up' and loses her shyness in the most surprising, perhaps even shocking ways. I don't want to say any more about it, because I don't want to spoil it. But this is a story filled with crisp, naughty, oh-so British situations that often simply cracked me up.

The second story, "The Shielding of Mrs Forbes," is an inter-generational family drama. Well, comedy-drama, actually, because Bennett, one of the creators of the comedy troupe, Beyond the Fringe, is perhaps one of the funniest guys you'll ever read. The story deals with closeted gays, blackmail, marriage, strong women and weak and/or vain men, and ... well, you just have to read the story. Is there really SMUT in these stories? Oh, you bet there is Once again, if you enjoy British humor, and especially slightly (ahem) 'smutty' humor about people who seem so real, you will LOVE this little book. I certainly did. Very highly recommended. (four and a half stars)

- Tim Bazzett, author of the memoir, BOOKLOVER show less

Two short stories – one short review.
From the very first page, where Mrs Donaldson encounters Terry in his tangerine Y-fronts with a mobile phone tucked into the waistband pondering problems in the back passage, I knew I was in for a rollicking read.
Classic Alan Bennett, revealing the quirks and foibles of human nature in his characteristic down-to-earth, dry and drole style.
Who could even begin to imagine what might go on behind closed doors?
Hats off to these two middle-aged ladies for veering off the trodden path of an ordinary, humdrum existence and venturing into unseemly pastures new.

Lately, there has been a spate of novels that enforce the lesson that one can never truly know someone else. While someone may portray himself in a public persona as polished and urbane, this same person could be struggling with a mental disorder or harboring a hoarding fetish. One just never knows and can never know all of the details. Smut is yet another example of this, focusing on sexual proclivities instead of other personality traits.

What is Smut? This is one instance where the author's choice of verbiage is quite telling. This one little word has multiple definitions, all of which apply to Bennett's stories. One definition for smut is a particle of dirt or a smudge made by soot or dirt. Yet another definition is something that is show more obscene in writing or speech. The third, and probably most well-known, definition is pornography. It is also a form of fungus on grains. Driving home the point that what is ordinary to some is extraordinary to others, both of Bennett's main characters experience a shift in their own definitions of smut. What both of them would have once considered obscene becomes acceptable, even commonplace. These acts become as innocent as a smudge of dirt to the main characters, while others revile their actions as akin to the lowliest form of fungi.

With a title like Smut, one would expect a fair level of explicit sex. While there are definitely sex scenes, Bennett shies away from crossing over into the pornographic. Granted, for certain readers even what is portrayed may be too much, but that is not Bennett's intent. Through Mrs. Donaldson's awakening and Graham's own experiences, the reader is meant to understand better the complexity of human nature and the fear in which each of us lives at the thought of being considered abnormal or different from others.

Because of its very nature, Smut is not for all audiences; it does take a fair amount of open-mindedness about sexuality to finish either story. For those willing and able to do so, Bennett's short stories provide tremendous insight into those who may be considered to be on the fringes of society, even if they appear perfectly ordinary to the world. Truly, what is "ordinary" and "normal" anyway?

Acknowledgements: Thank you to the Great Lakes Independent Booksellers Association for my advanced copy! show less

Just a few days after starting this book, I heard a caller on a podcast introduce himself as someone who has the same job as one of Bennett's main characters: someone who pretends to be a patient for doctors to practice on. A few days *before* starting this book, I'd never even heard of such work; in fact, when I started "Smut," I wondered whether Bennett had made the whole idea up.

So far the writing is funny and the story is engagingly bizarre. Interested to see where things go from here.

--Just finished. It's two novellas, both brilliant. I was worried that the second would be unpleasant, one of those works where the author seems to take pleasure in telling the story of entirely unlikable people. Not the case at all. The characters show more *should* be unlikable; instead, they're endearing (at least I found them so). And Bennett's use of the language is reliably wonderful. "She wasn't wholly infatuated, though she liked the way he looked; but, so too did he and that unfatuated her a bit." I will never be less than infatuated with this book. show less

Although Bennett's two "unseemly" stories involve sex, his portrayal has a down to earth quality that avoids indecency or eroticism. At the same time they are generously laced with humour that is tinged with a poignant element. Bennett's writing is never blatantly obvious, but rather it weaves many emotions that beautifully reflect reality. I enjoyed The Uncommon Reader more, but as usual, Bennett has created a thought-provoking work with subtle undertones.