Fear of Falling

I have to say that I fell for Kami and Fear of Falling very hard. I've been reading a lot of books like this lately. I just really enjoy the range of emotions stories like this can elicit within me and greatly appreciate stories about people finding happiness after pain, light after dark and redemption. Fear of Falling can proudly stand amongst the best books I've read that deal with these topics. I just want to say that this book is probably not for the faint of heart. It deals with some major subjects such as abuse, child abuse and rape and like the author states, for people who may have experienced these things this book could act as a trigger but I'd urge you to throw caution to the wind on this one and give it a try because I feel show more that it's message is so much more important than the tough subjects it tackles. And tackle these subjects S.L. Jennings does with a very deft hand. She states that this story was inspired by true events and I can't help but feel that the author has a personal deep knowledge of the subject matter whether she or someone she knows has gone through similar things because Kami and her pain are just too real and too raw. You never once for even a second doubt that her past was horrible. You can feel it in her every thought, every breath and every action she takes. Even when Kami is happy her happiness is tinged with pain. S.L. Jennings does a fantastic job with her characters, allowing us to live within them. To see, feel and touch everything that they do.

Kami is a broken woman. She's tortured, in a lot of pain and doesn't believe in love. She doesn't want love, nor does she really know what love is.

"Daddy's love hurts me. I don't want him to love me anymore."

Kami goes through most of her life going from man to man and always running away if they get too close. Once they utter the L word she runs. She is deathly afraid of love and doesn't believe anyone can love her. She's settled into her life of pain with her two best friends Dom and Angel who both have their own issues but the three of them form a dysfunctional family and they are the only two people she will allow herself to love. And then she meet's Blaine - her scary beautiful man. There is a chemistry between them from the first moment that they meet which was probably one of the hottest scenes I've ever read. As Blaine works his way into her heart Kami does everything she can to push him away and deny herself the love that she deserves.

No matter what my body felt, my head knew that I could never give myself to Blaine. And my heart? It never got a say. It was buried under years of mistrust and apprehension. It had been broken far beyond repair before it ever got the chance to open itself enough to love.

But Blaine's different and slowly Kami feels more than just sexual attraction and those feeling scare her but Blaine is persistent, kind, caring and does everything he can to try and show her that love doesn't have to hurt.

"Because, Kami, when you know, you know. And you don't fight it. You don't deny the inevitable. You free fall because you know there's someone there to catch you on the other side." His face inched closer to mine, close enough for the scent of mint and spice to intoxicate me as his earnest words entranced me. "You don't have to be afraid of falling. Just close your eyes, let go, and know that I'll always be here with arms outstretched ready to catch you."

There is much truth in honesty in Fear of Falling and I can only hope that every woman who has ever suffered from abuse can find their Blaine and allow love back into their lives. This truly is a remarkable book that is not only very well written but also felt very real. You will cry. You will feel anger, frustration and then joy and probably cry some more but it is so worth it. I hope that everyone is able to take the same message I received from this book. To allow yourselves the courage to find love and to be loved because no matter who you are, how broken you might think you are there is always somebody out there who will be willing to help put you back together again. To pick up all those little pieces of your soul and glue them back piece by piece one kiss at a time. show less

4.5 mind blowing, skin crawling stars! I burned my kids dinner when I decided I would read for a bit while that simmered. I seriously got so engrossed in the story at a pivotal point that I could not smell the disaster until it was too late! Wow! I didn't think I was going to love this story. I resisted even liking Kami until about 60% in. I loved Blaine from the first page and so wanted him to get his HEA. I hate spoilers and this story screams for major reveals. I am going to resist that urge to replay it all here because I think this story reads better if you don't know what is coming. I hated Blaine at one point. I hated Kami and her "in her own head" bullcrap so much until this one point up on a stage and I loved them both. The show more epilogue was amazing and frustrating because I need to know more. I need to know what happens in 2 years not in 2 months. The first time in a long time I'm hoping, finger crossed, begging that Angel and Dom will get a book and I can revisit these characters again. show less

Tough look at the effects of extreme childhood abuse. We get an up close and personal view of how that effects the child, the mother who was also abused in front of the child and a male best friend who also suffered unspeakable acts of abuse from a parent and how they cope trying to live with their past as adults.

Kami suffers not only from extreme PTSD but the years of abuse made her think she was unlovable and refused to allow any man to love her or for her to ever feel those feelings for another man. Her father warped the words love in her mind so bad that she things love and abuse are the same thing.

When Kami meets Blaine her body and heart recognizes that this is her soul mate but her fractured mind cannot let go of the past.

It show more was not an easy road for Kami and Blaine through out this book and there was still one more horrible thing that happens to Kami before she is finally able to put her demons aside enough to allow Blaine to love her. show less

This was a strong story, and the end was amazing. It had me in tears. That I was able to feel so much for the characters, and believe in their pain and joy, says a lot.

I loved the way S.L. Jennings described Blaine as "scary handsome" with "Just fu*ked" hair. And the barbell tongue... I never thought of a piercing quite that way. Now I do. All the characters were well scripted and the conversations between them believable.

But, I have such mixed feelings about two elements of the story being combined. Hearing how Kami was brutally beaten at the hands of her father, intermixed with hot, very detailed sex scenes had my heart and head warring with me.

It bothered me that the father was dropped into the story, out of the blue. It was too show more convenient, but it was far worse when Kami didn't attempt to fight him off... at all!

At times a bit wordy, and the action meanders in the middle. It could be tightened up a bit more, but Fear of Falling was a good, solid story. And I love that S.L. Jennings gives a shout out to abuse awareness. show less

I had a big long review for this and then accidently backspaced the window..

So here is a condensed version...

This story is emotional and will grab you. It will open your eyes to the scars physical and emotional pain can leave on an abused person's heart.

I felt Kami's pain in this story. I cried most of the times she did. Hell I even cried with Blaine. To say I loved their story almost seems cruel to them. But I loved their story together!

I loved Kami's best friends Dom and Angel. And yes i boo hoo'ed from Dom. I really hope him and Angel get a book! I need to see them realize they are deserving of being loved and being in love!

Read it, but keep tissues handy!

The writing was good and I love the abused heroine storyline. This was drawn out way too long for me. I ended up skimming fast by about 60%. I just kept thinking she is going to make an effort on her own behalf but she never did. She just kept saying how broken she was with no end in sight. It was interesting for about 40% but got old fast. She did A LOT of pushing Blaine away and being a bitch to him in the name of fear. I'm stopping right here.

**2.5**

This book didn't start off very strong, but for some reason I kept with it and it did pick up a bit after a rocky start. That said, the writing was still kind of mediocre (I don't consider "Oh. My. God." proper grammar) and it was only entertaining enough that I didn't skim.

I don't have an aversion to profanity - I can sling it with the best of them - but it often just felt gratuitous. There is an entire page of pretty much just the f-word at one point. It kind of felt that the author was trying to make certain characters feel "cool" by using excessive profanity. Dom and Angel would just sling foul words about each other, to each other, in what was supposed to be affection? IDK, perhaps there are people like that out there, but show more it just felt like trying to hard.

I did like Blaine as a character for the most part. He had some really romantic as hell moments and said some profound, moving things at times. But I sometimes felt like I didn't have a clear handle on his motivations. Although the same could be said for Kami too.

All in all it added up to a mediocre book for me. show less