Stitches: A Handbook on Meaning, Hope and Repair

Maybe I enjoy reading Anne's work because my family of origin was slightly less dysfunctional than her own. The formula outlined sure sounds familiar: "I love you. Now here are the rules." Or perhaps I've read so many of her non-fiction titles that I feel we are old friends chatting over tea again. There is comfort in that.

But more accurately, reading Stitches reminded me again that Anne Lamott does what other writers simply cannot do. She makes me aware of a slightly embarrassing truth: there are many Christian writers, some writers who are Christian, and then there's Anne. Anne talks about faith, nay, Christianity, in a way that makes the religion responsible for the horrors of the crusades and the inquisition look more like a gentle show more carpenter or a 30- year-sober single mom writing about hope and meaning in the face of loss. A viable option for real, messed up, marvelous, dear persons.

"I wish there were shortcuts to wisdom and self-knowledge: cuter abysses or three-day wilderness experiences. Sadly, it doesn't work this way. I so resent this." (33)

"While it is hard to fathom who we are and how we are to live when public chaos shatters our routine, the slow-motion pain of each private death and cataclysm we endure is harder. Each slams us off our feet, yet we have agreed to pretend to be fine again at some point, ideally as soon as possible, so as not to seem self-indulgent or embarrass anybody. Then people can get on with their lives." (37)

Anne invite others to share in the redemption process wrought by God (shorthand for good in the world), and flows along (with spurts of rapture and resentment), unencumbered by the multi-level marketing of friendship evangelism or the nagging desire for validation of her perspective. Some writers leave me ashamed, not of the gospel, but chagrined by their sales-y voices that claim roles as gospel messengers through print.

Anne just claims to be Anne. Getting older. Still distressed and amazed by life and what comes of living it with caring friends who may have dental hygiene issues. show less

It can be too sad here. We so often lose our way.

Lamott begins this little book while reeling from the Sandy Hook school shootings and trying to find her way back to hope the same way she did while recovering from alcoholism, and after 9/11, and after other personal and public tragedies. Her way is by taking the best next step and then the next, and to do so in community with others:

[T]he secret of life is patch patch patch. Thread your needle, make a knot, find one place on the other piece of torn cloth where you can make one stitch that will hold. And do it again. And again. And again. [...] Ram Das, who described himself as a Hin-Jew, said that ultimately we’re all just walking each other home. [...] Only together do we somehow show more keep coming through unsurvivable loss. [...] This is all that restoration requires most of the time, that one person not give up.

In size and format and compassionate tone, this little book is very much like Lamott’s previous Help Thanks Wow. In content, it’s perhaps a prequel to that volume -- a way to awaken from trauma to the point of asking for help. It’s extremely comforting ... a book that reads and rereads like a meditation. show less

I haven't yet read an Anne Lamott book I didn't love. I was shocked by the slight size of this book when it arrived, but the contents were for me, a sublime distilled and condensed version of everything I love about this author and how she copes with life in crazy times. I could use some help coping in these crazy times, so I am her target audience.

I could have read this book in a few hours, but I took my time, reading in bits and pieces so I could ponder how succinctly she can sum up some of life's most heartbreaking scenarios and realities; and how she, and we all stitch together our lives, patching as we go, leaning on others and being leaned on in return. It is a guidebook for getting through life, even when you think you can't show more bear any more. This tiny book is a lovely sewing metaphor for life, written by a woman who knows well how the fabric of life can wear and tear, how dearly beloved people come and go in our lives, and how we patch and mend and darn and we go on, because that is what we do.

I know I will read this book again. It is full of grand observations, helpful coping hints and surprising optimism. I'm not sure how well this condensed Anne world view will translate for a novice reader. For me, reading more about Pammy, Sam, all main characters who are woven into all her earlier works was like visiting with old friends, and I loved, understood and got every page of Stitches. For the die hard fan, this is a must read and re-read book. show less

Is there someone not in need of meaning, hope, and repair?

Anne Lamott's 'Stitches' is a laid back, low key dissertation on survival. How does one justify the tragedies and injustices of modern life? Are there words of wisdom that can get us through the bad times?

Lamott gently shares her own coping mechanisms and helps guide the reader into realizing her own opinions and views. It's reaffirming to find someone who has spent time pondering the need to recover from life's blows and who doesn't overwhelm with pat solutions.

Life is hard and then you die. Consider Lamott a guide on the path to making that life worth the effort.

There are no easy answers. But if life is truly worth living, then each of us does need a path through its dark moments.

Okay, NOW Anne Lamott has really won me over! This book is like a piece of Dove dark chocolate--small, but rich in a way that makes you want to roll it around on your tongue and let it melt slowly. I probably read it too fast, actually, but I have a feeling I'll be coming back to it again and again, so that's okay for now.

If I had to give this book my own sub-title, I would call it The Spiritual First Aid Kit! It certainly belongs in any First Aid Kit prepared to deal with the pain that life can bring. And as Anne isn't afraid to point out...life does deal us some blows...disappointments, fear, rejection...things that make you cry out, "WHY???" But most of the time, there isn't an answer, so what do you do?

Anne provides some tools. Through anecdotal stories and unashamed candor, she tells it like it is for her...and with that she gives us something to hang on to in the midst of all of it...she gives us hope.

I have loved Anne Lamott's writing for years. I have read her advice to fellow writers, her novels and her other memoirs. She delivers each show more time...with authenticity and humor. She says what we may whisper in the "silence of our hearts" and we sit back and say..."I can't believe she really said that!"

A short book, "Stitches" can be read through quickly and also picked up quickly in the midst of an emotional emergency! Again, thank you Anne Lamott! show less

When I saw the title of Anne Lamott’s new book, “Stitches: a Handbook on Meaning, Hope, and Repair,” I very much wanted to read it. I was thrilled when I was chosen to receive an advance copy. As someone working with fiber art, I had given quite a bit of thought to the analogy between stitching (patchwork, mending, repair) and the psychological ways we cope with life, damage, and wear. Some of Lamott’s thoughts did mirror my own on that subject.

“[Y]ou realize that the secret of life is patch patch patch. Thread your needle, make a knot, find one place on the other piece of torn cloth where you can make one stitch that will hold. And do it again. And again. And again.”

“We live stitch by stitch, when we’re lucky. If you show more fixate on the big picture, the whole shebang, the overview, you miss the stitching. And maybe the stitching is crude, or it is unraveling, but if it were precise, we’d pretend that life was just fine and running like a Swiss watch. This is not helpful if on the inside our understanding is that life is more often a cuckoo clock with rusty gears.”

This is the first of Lamott’s books that I have read, so I have no basis to compare it to her other work. While it was extremely readable, and at times profoundly thoughtful, I found her style to be a bit superficial and flippant. She often seemed to go for the easy laugh. And although the narrative jumps around a bit and at times trails off altogether, it truly is a patchwork of her thoughts, which is in keeping with the title and theme of the book. But I found myself wanting the patchwork to match up a bit more, to be more cohesive or flowing. It is a very slim volume. Perhaps I was just looking for a bit more embroidery or depth.

All in all, I found a lot to like and relate to in this book. And how can you not like someone who can throw in quotes from Emerson, Barry Lopez, Robert Heinlein’s “Stranger in a Strange Land”, Ram Dass, Walt Whitman, and Mother Theresa? show less