Where I Lost Her

A special thank you to Kensington and NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review. Cover Love! 5 Stars +

An avid fan of talented storyteller, T. Greenwood, she returns following The Forever Bridge, "Best 2015 Literary Suspense Fiction" landing on my Top 50 Books of 2015, with her latest, and most captivating book yet, WHERE I LOST HER—Top Domestic Suspense Thrillers of 2016.

Superbly written, from the striking front cover-- a lost little girl in the woods, appearing in the darkness, in the middle of the road, wearing a tattered tutu and boots, connects briefly with a woman suffering from her own horrific tragedy – and a desperate need to save a little girl from impending danger; when no one believes she even exists, show more questioning her sanity.

In 2007 in Guatemala City, Tess Waters had believed promises. There was a thin line between patience and foolishness. She had paid dearly for her optimism and blind faith. Hope overriding all sensibility. This had become her religion; her faith; driven by simple and primitive selfish want. Willful and necessary blindness. Her hopes and dreams vanished.

Jump to the present Lake Gormlaith, Vermont, June 2015. Tess and her husband Jake are visiting from Brooklyn. Effie and Devin live in a cabin (a camp by the lake) in a remote area, where she grew up. The couple have two daughters, Plum (ten) and Zu-Zu (thirteen). Tess loves the girls. It has been a year since their last visit—it hurts too much to see this beautiful family, and a cruel reminder of what they have lost.

The girls, always excited with their pending visits, bringing them gifts from the city, calling them aunt and uncle. Tess and Effie had been friends since they were just girls, still like sisters. ZuZu has been accepted into a prestigious summer ballet intensive in the city, and they are to bring her back with them when they leave on Sunday. Effie’s sister is there and will be teaching her classes.

Jake is a literary agent, and two years earlier he started his own boutique agency. Tess suspects he is also having an affair; she sees the flirty banter of texts. She has been carrying around this secret for months. She is numb. Tess left the publishing world eight years ago, back from Central America. Effie is a busy mom, and drives a bookmobile for the library and Devin teaches art at the college, an artist himself. Sometimes Tess yearns for this simple life, and she misses her best friend.

Readers never fully understand in the beginning what happened in Tess’s past, and the extent of her tragedy; however, Greenwood unravels pieces of the puzzle as we move along with flash backs to the days in Guatemala and after. Ultimately the last portion is revealed near the end—powerful.

Tess had a strong desire for a child and was unable to have any, and turned to the adoption route after unsuccessful attempts. Something happened to shatter her dreams and she is still emotionally hanging by a thread, drowning herself in alcohol. Her hopes and dreams were lost, and now her marriage is in trouble. Something went wrong with the adoption—and ultimately affecting their careers, financial status, and their personal relationship. What happened in Guatemala?

The first night in Vermont, Tess needs another bottle of wine to soothe her nerves and takes off to the store, after she has already had a few glasses. Six miles away, a deserted rural dirt road. However, while at the store, she sees a strange man in a white truck at the gas pump, with a vicious pit bulldog. He gives her a creepy feeling.

On her way back to the camp in the bend of the road, she hits a pothole and the wine rolls off in the floor and cracks. All of a sudden when she is reaching, she leans back up and sees something in her headlights. Her heart pounding, she sees a little girl. She is ghostly pale, naked from the waist up, wearing a tattered pink tutu and plastic rain boots, red with black spots like a ladybug. Around four years old, with a little round belly, wild eyes, and curly brown hair. She looks frightened. Her hand is bleeding and she reaches out to her.

The girl is scared, and she notices an orange plastic bunny barrette in her hair, which has come loose. She looks cold, so Tess is walking back to the car to get her sweater; however, she clicks on the remote to the trunk and instead hits the alarm and scares her. Off she goes in the dark black wilderness.

Tess is chasing her in the cold darkness full of adrenaline and heart pounding. She goes back to her car to get her phone and then she sees the headlights of the truck from the store, which passes and does not stop. She has no signal to call 911. She has been drinking, and her car is full of wine. She leaves the sweater as a marker and goes back to her friend’s house to call for help. She is frantic.

They begin an extensive search for days—the authorities are called in with dogs and helicopters. Search parties. No one can find the little girl. No one has reported her missing. Where did she go? Tess will not leave to return to Brooklyn until she finds this little girl. After a while, no one believes her. An illusion, based on her past stress and mental health? Was she drinking and just imagined the girl? They call in a psychic and she believes her. She gives her clues which help; however, Tess is determined she will continue to search.

When the police call off the search, Tess begins digging and starts her own investigation. However, she soon learns there is a pedophile living close by, a day care woman which is acting strange, a man in a while truck with a dog with clipped ears, illegal activity, and a criminal drug ring. All the while, she cannot rest until she finds this little girl. She senses she is in great danger.

She lost something once, and now she will fight to the bitter end. She is driven and obsessed with this helpless little girl. Everyone thinks she is the girl who cried wolf and no one takes her seriously, based on her past and present state. On top of her desperate need to find the little girl before it is too late, the cops are suing her for using their manpower for a meaningless search and has to hire a local attorney. All the while she has to stop drinking to be strong to find this little one.

Spellbinding! A bittersweet domestic suspense, both haunting and healing---Greenwood captures readers from the first page to the last, with an ongoing dark sense of foreboding and danger, lurking in the background, drawing you into the suspense and mystery. The scene when she was hiding out in the bathroom--I was on pins and needles, holding my breath!

Having read all T. Greenwood’s books, each is a journey to discovery, a new birth, overcoming tragedy and loss; to hope. Poignant, and compelling, keeping you glued to the pages. An absorbing story which will grab you and characters you recall long after the book ends.

With a blend of Greenwood’s special literary flair, domestic family drama, and the fast-paced, heart-pounding intensity, suspense, and mystery of a riveting psychological -crime thriller! You cannot miss this one—you will be enamored by this little girl, and one courageous woman’s determination. show less

I prefer balanced characters. The main character, Tess, is a very negative, alcoholic woman who is repeatedly accused of being delusional. At the end of the book, the character experiences a very sudden transformation into a sunny, clear-headed figure. Unless I missed it, the author never puts Tess through the months of therapy she probably needed, but attributed the reformation to a singular life event.

I am an adoptive parent, and the author’s knowledge of the subject of adoption seemed to be shallow and idealistic.

Two stars for remarkable descriptive language especially as it pertains to nature. The author really shines her attempts to transport the reader into the New England camp.

This was my second read of a book by T. Greenwood, and I have found both to be immersing. The stories totally draw me in, and the characters are drawn with such detail to emotional nuance. Once I started this book I couldn't put it down, as the central character, Tess deals with her deep longing for a child, a marriage that is beginning to feel shaky and empty, and the disappearance of a little girl that she glimpses in the middle of a road late one night. These various plot lines are interdependent, and the author keeps the reader guessing just how much, and in what ways, they might all twist together.
In both the books I have read by this author, there is little laughter or joy, although there is some redemption, in the end. They show more definitely will stick with me. show less

I know it is always said, never judge a book by it's cover but a cover is what initially draws a reader in a bookstore full of books. This cover grabbed me; a haunting picture of a little girl in a beautiful magical looking forest with nothing else around. After reading the summary, I was hooked. I am not familiar with much of T. Greenwood's works but after reading this book I will be hunting them down.
Tess and Jake's marriage is a little rocky. Tess desperately has wanted a child, they, well more Tess, have jumped through every hoop to make that happen. They were so close, but a failed adoption devastated her and left her broken.
When they go back to Tess's home town in Vermont to visit her best friend since childhood, Effie, they are show more to stay a few days and then take Effie and Devin's daughter back with them to New York.
During a night of drinking, Tess drives into town to buy another bottle of wine. On the way back, she almost hits a little girl standing in the road but the child is scared off and disappears into the woods. After unsuccessfully trying to find her, she goes back to the cottage to call the police and a massive search for the child is started. But with no results, it is thought of as a hoax and her to be a crackpot that isn't believed and the search is stopped. But Tess knows what she saw, and cannot get past her vision of a little girl lost, hungry and alone in the woods. Who knows how much of her desperation to find this child is from her own past but she won't let go and can't focus on much but finding this child.
This book is so emotional. I felt with Tess, her desperation, and frustration and I couldn't turn the pages fast enough to find out what happens. I felt her fear as the lengths she went to scared the pants off me; she is way braver than I am. I admired her strength and conviction while terrified for her. I didn't admire Jake though, had very negative feelings towards him.
I am always drawn to books with summer and cottages, having such fond memories of my own. Even just the description of staring at the lake in an adirondack chair (we call them Muskoka chairs here, beautiful Ontario) gives me warm fuzzy feelings. I loved that part of this book, and her relationship with Effie as well.
This book can be devoured quickly. It isn't terribly lengthy but it's a book you don't want to put down, one my favourites this year for sure. show less

With a possibly unreliable narrator, Where I Lost Her by T. Greenwood is an intriguing mystery that keeps readers on the edge of their seats as Tess Waters tries to locate a missing young girl.

Tess and her husband Jake are visiting friends in rural Vermont when, returning from a late night run to the store, she sees a young girl in the middle of the road. Although the police are little slow to respond to her emergency call, they put together an extensive search that slowly tapers off within a few days. Convinced Tess is either mistaken or outright lying, the local police remain unreceptive to her pleas to continue looking for the missing girl. When the cops threaten to charge her for filing a false report, she hires attorney Ryan show more Hughes, who pleads with her to stay out of the case. Unable to stop worrying about the little girl, she continues her search and although she does not locate her, Tess stumbles onto evidence that supports her claim but will the police reopen their investigation?

Tess's marriage never quite recovered from the couple's infertility treatments and a botched adoption attempt eight years earlier. Their relationship is quite strained during their visit with their friends and Tess's excessive drinking exacerbates the tension between them. At first supportive of Tess, Jake's doubts continue to grow especially considering what happened after their adoption attempt went horribly wrong. The fact that she had been drinking the evening she spotted the young girl is another strike against her and Jake eventually returns to New York without her.

Tess's main priority is continuing her efforts to find the missing girl but she is also quite reflective as she tries to decide what to do about her troubled marriage. Her longtime friend Effie not only believes Tess saw the little girl, but after Tess confides recently discovered information about Jake, she is outraged on Tess's behalf. Despite Effie's fears for her safety, Tess continues taking unnecessary risks as she makes impulsive decisions that are dangerous and oftentimes, foolhardy.

The events from eight years earlier are slowly revealed through a series of flashbacks. What begins as a happy occasion becomes emotionally charged after Jake joins Tess in Guatemala where she has been spending time with the little girl they are planning to adopt. These flashbacks slowly reveal the cracks in their marriage as Tess begins to realize that she was much more invested in having children than Jake and she starts wondering what other important information she might have overlooked about her husband. She remains ambivalent about their marriage for a good portion of the novel, but a family emergency puts things in perspective for her and Tess finally arrives at a decision about her future.

With a unique twist on the unreliable narrator plot device, Where I Lost Her is a well-written and engaging novel that is initially a little slow paced. The characters are three-dimensional with true to life flaws and imperfections. The storyline is wonderfully developed and the suspense builds as Tess continues trying to piece together the puzzling clues she uncovers. Overall, it is a very clever mystery/psychological thriller that old and new fans of T. Greenwood are sure to enjoy. show less

Tess and Jake are struggling in their marriage, partly as a result of their inability to have children, or adopt a child, something that Tess desperately wants. When they visit friends in Vermont, Tess goes out late to the store, and sees a young child wandering in the night. The child runs away and Tess reports the sighting to the police.
However, after a search, the police struggle to believe Tess, citing her issues with another incident in her past.
This is an emotional novel, with the strains of a marriage on its last legs, and the stress of wanting a child so badly that it consumes everything. I enjoyed this and I will add this author’s other books to my list

This is the first book by this author I've read, and I owe it all to the cover and my local library. The book weaves a back story of one couple's tries to adopt a child and the present day story of the sighting of a little girl, alone and hurt in the backwoods of New England. I happen to be quite fond of this style of story-telling, and both aspects drew me in, so that I was both sorry to switch POV and eager to get to the other POV at the same time.