Forever, or a Long, Long Time

Convincingly told story of two children overcoming the trauma of foster system life as they settle into their adopted reality. 4th grader and little brother, they’ve always been each other’s only constant thing. She struggles to speak sometimes and he hoards food and neither of them believe that they were ever born. In parts poetic, in parts strictly focused on the day to day routine, always coming back to a child’s point of view, and how different from the adult understanding of reality that can be. Sometimes funny, sometimes sad. Sometimes just difficult to read, sometimes intensely hopeful. A great read, but also a sophisticated emotional ride.

This book is as beautifully written as its cover is in design. Written from the perspective of fourth grade, Flora, it tells the tale of a broken foster system and young siblings journey from their adoptive home back to their beginning. This is art brought to life and it will split open your heart. It will make you ask, “what is family?” And “how do we learn to love?” And so much more.
I have friends who’ve experienced fostering and being adopted and I have friends who’ve fostered and adopted. I’ve felt for a long time the little tugs on my heart to do the same. This book has only opened my heart even more toward this possibility. Every child needs a “person.”

This book is as beautifully written as its cover is in design. Written from the perspective of fourth grade, Flora, it tells the tale of a broken foster system and young siblings journey from their adoptive home back to their beginning. This is art brought to life and it will split open your heart. It will make you ask, “what is family?” And “how do we learn to love?” And so much more.
I have friends who’ve experienced fostering and being adopted and I have friends who’ve fostered and adopted. I’ve felt for a long time the little tugs on my heart to do the same. This book has only opened my heart even more toward this possibility. Every child needs a “person.”

This is an excellent story to help kids understand the complicated life of foster children. No one can truly understand the suffering unless you’ve been through it, but this book reveals what no one can see. It reveals the inner thought patterns of a foster child and the circumstances that formed those patterns. At times, it’s heartbreaking. However, this story has the ending that every foster child hopes for. A forever family.

Flora and her brother, Julian, have limited recollection of their history. When Flora observes the classroom mouse giving birth, she surprises the teacher by asking where the nonborn kids come from. She is genuinely confused. Throughout the book she offers up theories about where she and her brother came from. show more From the ocean. From the TV. And other theories.

It’s been over a year since they were adopted, but they still struggle. Julian won’t stop hiding food. Flora is always on guard, certain that the good will end. Their problems stem from their failure to develop an attachment with a loving adult. In some ways, Flora acts younger than she is. Her emotions are unstable, easily fluctuating between love and hate. She constantly overanalyzes every situation and is easily confused. For example, she confuses her teacher’s desire for her to pass 4th grade as wanting to be rid of her.

Though their adoptive parents clearly love them, Flora struggles with fear. When she learns they will be having a baby she and her brother step up their efforts to hide their true feelings and appear perfect.

“No matter how much we want to see Gloria again, no matter how much we want to remember, no matter how much we want to know where we came from, we can’t ask for anything. We have to be easy. We have to be normal.”

When their adoptive mother realizes that shielding them from their past is doing more harm than good, she agrees to go back to all the places they have lived. This leads to shocking revelations, some good, some bad.

Highly recommend. show less

Flora and Julian have been living with their adopted parents for a couple of years now, but they still struggle with believing that this is their "forever" family after having been bounced around the foster care system. Things get even more complicated when they learn that their mother is pregnant, and they fear their parents will love their biological child more than them -- or may even give up on their promise of forever once the baby arrives.

I liked this book more than I thought I would from the first few pages. It is an emotional ride, so it may not be for everyone. But it appears that the author either did a lot of research or has some firsthand knowledge of the foster care/adoption system in the U.S. Either way, the story and the show more characters are believable (even if the adopted mother is almost a little too saintly at times). The reader gets invested in Flora and Julian's story and wants to learn about their history alongside them.

Like I said, this book may not appeal to every reader, but it will help them empathize with others if they do stick with it or will help children who have been in similar situations find comfort and understanding. show less

4.5 stars. This book was heart breaking at times but very insightful. I do have to agree with some of the comments that at the end it did seem to be pushing an obvious lesson in Person's questioning and dialog. On the flip side, I can see how someone in her shoes would be very frustrated and would be grasping for answers to make some kind of sense of what she was learning. It's said that the system is broken. I did love the writing, especially in Flora and Julian's theories.

A moving book about the inner life of Flora, a girl who grew up in multiple homes through the foster care system. She is permanently adopted, along with her younger brother, at the age of nine. Flora and her brother Julian don't believe they were ever born. They think they never had a biological family. Now Flora is eleven years old and trying really hard to trust her new mom and believe that she and Julian will be with her forever. But she is held back by her ignorance of her own origins.

The subject matter is important and the writing is mostly very good, but I struggled with the length. There were a lot of unnecessary paragraphs. I'm generally a patient reader, but I skimmed big chunks of this that didn't seem relevant to the plot. I show more was eager to find out about Flora and Julian's past. The meandering pace left me frustrated.

I was ambivalent about the italicized interstitial "Theory #" pieces. Yes, they were lovely pieces of writing. But they weren't in Flora's voice. They were lyrical, poetic. They were in the first person plural, speaking for both Flora and Julian. I think they might have worked better in third person because it felt like the author's own voice taking over Flora's.

I also never understood why no one had access to Flora and Julian's birth certificates. I understand why they didn't have originals, but copies of birth certificates can be obtained from government records. It seemed like an obvious way to prove to Flora that she was born and to find the names of her birth parents. I kept waiting for someone to go there and no one did. Frustrating. Was there some mention of this that I missed?

The best part of this book, I think, is that it explores an experience that is sadly common but not represented well in children's literature. The book is certainly critical of the foster care system, but didn't feel overly didactic (though it did tread close when they got to Jeannie the meanie). I think young readers will sympathize with Flora (even when she punches someone) and Julian (even when he's hiding food in his closet). Definitely a worthwhile read. show less