The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times

As I was brushing my teeth this morning after finishing this book, this line came into my head:

When I find myself of times of trouble, Pema Chodron calls to me, speaking words of wisdom: Let it be...

Corny, huh? Totally true. I read When Things Fall Apart over a year ago when I was going through a really rough time, and when I hit a serious road block nearly two months ago, I picked this'n up. In similar fashion with my reading habits of late, I only just finished this wonderful morsel. I won't be stashing it away on the old bookshelf just yet though. I've still got tough times to face, so it will stay right where it is on my nightstand.

At first I was totally repelled by the title in accordance with my instant aversion to anything show more sounding like a self-help book (perhaps that's too telling...) (I bristled before falling in love with Amy Hempel's Reasons to Live), but then I thought, "You know what? I do need help." And then, "Yeah, 'cause you know what? I am freaked the F*** out right now." I love her. She is the most accesible Buddhist author I've yet encountered. Her approach is realistic--even though I am still struggling with the craziness, I am slowly able to incorporate the exercises, acting on the moment.

Favorite line: "All too frequently we relate like timid birds who don't dare to leave the nest. Here we sit in a nest that's getting pretty smelly and that hasn't served its function for a very long time" (8). You heard it, folks. Smelly nest. show less

While I have read another of Pema Chodron's books and therefore knew what to expect, this was a thought-provoking, mind-altering experience, and perhaps, I can hope, a life-changing one as well. One of the tenets of the book is that we experience everything that happens to us through our egos, and therefore do not experience anything clearly and unfiltered. Our egos are trying to limit or control the uncertainty and ambiguity in the world around us. Every experience, every conversation, every interaction is influenced by this internal dialogue that often has nothing to do with the experience itself. One of the suggestions which was helpful to me to try is to experience any emotion you feel separate from that internal story-telling. For show more instance, you get angry. How does it feel to be angry? What are you feeling in your body when you are angry? Do that without thinking about the event that you believe caused you to become angry or engaging in any internal dialogue that ties the emotion and the event together. How can you deal with the emotion completely separate from the event?

I may be misrepresenting the ideas in the book, but how do you explain the value of the book without describing some of the ideas and what they mean to you. I was only able to absorb a fraction of what was presented; that is my limitation. This will definitely be worth a second read, and perhaps a third, in an effort to absorb what I did not get the first time around and to better understand those ideas I did grasp. show less

Pema Chodron is a Buddhist nun with a gift for wit and words. Her writings about Buddhist principles are fun to read, accessible and understandable. I have turned to her books in times of grief and despair and been inspired and comforted each time.

4.5*

"We cling to a fixed idea of who we are and it cripples us. Nothing and no one is fixed. Whether the reality of change is a source of freedom for us or a source of horrific anxiety makes a significant difference. Do the days of our lives add up to further suffering or to increased capacity for joy? That’s an important question."

Not much to say about this one: Pema has a great way of explaining concepts relating to meditation, but I would not recommend this book to someone who is new to Buddhism or meditation practice. If anything, this book is a good accompaniment but it does require some familiarity with terms and concepts.

Nevertheless, a thoughtful compilation of stories and advice which invites readers and practitioners to show more question everything. show less

One of the most inspiring spiritual teachers of our time offers simple, practical advice for living with less fear, less anxiety and a more open heart.

We always have a choice, Pema Chodron teaches: We can let the circumstances of our lives harden us and make us increasingly resentful and afraid, or we can let them soften us and make us kind.

This book shows us how to awaken our basic goodness and connect to others. In her lively, contemporary voice, Chodron translates the wisdom of the Tibetan Buddhist tradition for the layperson. Her fans come from all religions and none. Her wisdom cuts across all traditions and religions – appealing to everyone from the Dalai Lama’s followers to ordinary people trying to make sense of their show more lives.

This title went straight onto the bestseller lists in the USA when it was originally published. Pema Chodron is a spiritual teacher for anyone – whether they have a spiritual path or not. Her heartfelt advice and wisdom (developed in her 20 years of practice as a Tibetan Buddhist nun as well as her years previously as a normal ‘housewife and mother’) give her a wide appeal. Particularly in these difficult times, this advice strikes just the right note, offering us comfort and challenging us to live deeply and contribute to creating a more loving world. show less

This is a book I will have to re-read. As soon as I finished it, I felt the need to begin it again. I will be thinking about many of the things she writes about for a long time.

This book introduces a large number of practices that seem potentially useful for coping with fear of things we can't control. But that's all it does - each chapter is a short, superficial description of a practice, very few of which I feel able to really engage with from just that description. I suppose this is more a case of just not being what I was looking for than a real flaw in the book.