Anonymous Rex

I realize the premise is difficult to picture: the dinosaurs didn’t die out, they simply learned how to disguise themselves as human and they walk among us yet. It sounds odd, and even worse, silly. But here’s the kicker: if you overlook the reptile conceit, this is a classic hard-boiled mystery, and a pretty good one at that. Go ahead. Give it a try. I won’t tell anyone.

Reading Anonymous Rex is like watching Killer Klowns from Outer Space...swallow the premise whole and you can cruise through an interesting story. Vincent Rubio is Sam Spade in lizard skin. Disguised as a human, as is 15% of the population, the velociraptor gumshoe is investigating the death of a dinosaur, only this one is rich and his death is tied to the suspicious death of Rubio's partner. The trail leads him from LA to New York on a job that might be related. The present descendants of the supposedly extinct dinosaurs are human size, and possess certain characteristics. T-rex, for example, is big, blustery, and dumb as a box of fossils. Obviously, velociraptors are bright and, luckily for Rubio, capable of putting up a good fight show more when they get into trouble...which happens a lot. Good story. show less

If the titles haven't won you over yet (Anonymous Rex, Casual Rex, Hot and Sweaty Rex), here's why you should give this book a chance:

1. The main character is a likable one. I like Vince Rubio more than Harry Dresden (Jim Butcher's The Dresden Files). At the start of the book Vince is a mess. He's addicted to basil*, he just got kicked out of the Council, he's wrecked his reputation as a PI and therefore his career is suffering, so he's broke and hungry.

* In this world, the intoxicants for dinosaurs are herbs. And not like MJ "herbs", but legit cooking herbs, such as oregano, rosemary and thyme. Alcohol doesn't affect them at all.

But then you learn that he's still grieving over his recently deceased friend and business partner, Ernie, show more which was what drove him to go to extremes to investigate the supposed accident that killed Ernie. So that kind of fierce loyalty and desire for the truth has to count for something, right?

He's also got some good fighting skills, defeating the giant mutant dinosaur he encounters, demonstrates he is a gentleman without needing to state it repeatedly like when he tries to keep in business mode even when Sarah Archer was literally throwing herself onto his lap, and even later on doesn't take advantage of her drunken state, and did I mention yet that he's a velociraptor?

2. The side characters aren't just meat shields. They're fleshed out enough such that when things happen to them, you feel for them. I got genuinely sad when Vince's police friend Dan dies, and felt relieved when Glenda survives the deluge.

3. I like the idea that each dinosaur has their individual natural scent, which is apparently very strong for other dinosaurs, but undetectable to humans. Remember this part because it's one of the things that trips up the antagonist.

4. There's a chance to view the issues of inter-racial and inter-species relationships, and the advances of biotechnology (genetic manipulation), in light of our current social climate. When is it a breakthrough of love, and when is it an abomination? It could also be a trans issue, maybe? Like is it bad for humans to want to be dinosaurs? And how a dinosaur who starts to think he's human is considered suffering from a disease.

5. It was fun learning about the stereotypes of each dinosaur in this universe. Like how the Brontosaurus is the quarterback type, the Ankies (Ankylosaurs) the used-car-salemen, and the Compys (Procompsognathus) are the small but aggressive simpletons. T-rex's seem like the demon bosses, and Triceratops are kind of the heavyset but common folk. You also have the sharp-featured Carnotaurs (Ernie and McBride), suave and wily Raptors (Donovan and Vince) and no-nonsense Hadrosaurs (Glenda). And so on. I used to watch the TV show Grimm, and this reminded me a bit of that.

What I didn't like about the book:

1. Forget about rational thought from the very start. The basic premise is that dinosaurs faked their extinction and have been disguising themselves as humans all this time. Signing up for this book means you agree to let the laws of nature bend around. How does a creature the size of a bus squish itself into a stretchy suit to look like, say, being generous, a six-foot-tall man? Where do the snouts go? How do the claws turn into hands? More importantly, how do they go to the bathroom in case of an emergency?

This book cajoles you into not looking too closely at it. Just be a bro and let these things slide. Don't let your pretty little head be caught up in petty details involving the Law of Conservation of Mass.

2. All that dinosaur sex. Ech. A few pages of detailed, though enthusiastic, reptile copulation does nothing for me. Also, re-read my point #1 above. Just thinking about dino-human sex is like trying to mentally draw an Escher diagram of Peg A fitting into Slot λ.

3. The climax suffers from Talkative Villain (Those Meddling Kids!) syndrome. As a detective, Vince has a few hunches, but these are all just confirmed when he conveniently catches most of the baddies in a single room and they explain their entire nefarious plot to him. In that same scene, Vince talks for an awful long time, in a dramatic fashion, and I can't help think that if I were a more impatient villain that would have been the perfect time to just kill him off.

4. The plot twists feel like they're just making fun of us at this point. Dinosaurs pretend to be human, but surprise, there are a couple of humans pretending to be dinosaurs. At one point, said human dresses up as a dinosaur at a costume party. So she's a human pretending to be a dinosaur pretending to be a human pretending to be a dinosaur. WHAT. There was also a device where Person calls Vince up with some Important Information, but instead of relaying it over the phone, they decide to meet up. But before they do, Something Happens. I think the author was aware of it though so he has Vince say at one point "You can just tell me over the phone you know."

All in all, if you obediently suspend your disbelief, and weather through some of the genre's tropes, you might end up still enjoying this, as I did. show less

If dinosaurs were not extinct, but had rather spent the last few hundred million years evolving into sentient beings, what a dilemma they'd have! Would they live side-by-side with humans, another intelligent race vying for control of the world? If they chose that course, would they be the dominant race, or would humans? And, if they chose another course, what would it be?

In Anonymous Rex, the first of the Dino Mafia books, we learn that when it appeared that Neanderthal and his ilk were going to evolve into what they did (namely, us) dinosaurs decided to take it to the downlow: they would construct disguises--or guises, as they call them--that would allow them to walk among us, live and work with us. Secret but equal (if very, very show more uncomfortable: imagine what it would be like to have to clamp your tail down under a costume, all day every day).

Vince Rubio is a down-on-his-luck private dick in L.A. who also happens to be a velociraptor. His partner was killed 8 months ago and he's been hitting the herbs--that is to say, basil, rosemary, and thyme--pretty heavily since then. His client base has all but eroded away, his town house is in foreclosure...he's a mess. So, when he gets subcontracted (by a fellow dino, natch)to investigate a night club fire, and the case leads him to New York where his partner was killed, he's off the hard stuff and onto the chase.

The hard-boiled aspect of Anonymous Rex is adequate, if a bit hackneyed. What's fun about this novel is the hilarious explication of dinosaur culture and how it can have been maintained lo these thousands of years without humanity being any the wiser. Oh, and the name-dropping of famous dinos (Napoleon. John Fogerty. Tom Waits. Paul Simon.) doesn't hurt the fun factor either. show less

Dinosaurs couldn't have survived, evolved into smaller creatures, developed elaborate human suits and decided to live undetected amongst us with their own shadow government, right?

Well, if they hadn't, Anonymous Rex wouldn't have a whole lot to go on. Vincent Rubio, down-on-his-luck private investigator is on the case of his life - one that might lead to answers in his partner's death - and he's a raptor. (Most of the Brontosaurs tend to be NFL players.)

The mystery services well enough, with only a few last-minute plot points introduced to tie up lose ends. That's easily forgiven as the majority of the book is spent explaining how Dinosaurs spent the last few millennia going through the world undetected. (Dragons being a notable lapse show more in protocol.) It's a clever premise and funny to boot. show less

Vincent Rubio is a private detective whose life and career have been on the skids ever since his partner died in what everybody but Vincent believes was a random car accident. He's given one last chance to redeem himself by conducting a supposedly simple arson investigation which, inevitably, leads back to the case his partner was working when he died.

Oh, and also, Vincent is a dinosaur. Don't look so surprised. Something like 10% of the population are in fact dinosaurs -- or, rather, their descendents -- living among us secretly, disguised as humans. Really.

This is, of course, a ludicrous premise. The plot is pretty ludicrous, too, and I didn't find it especially compelling as a mystery, despite all its twists and turns. The narrative show more voice is fun, though, making this a breezy, mildly amusing take-off on the hardboiled detective genre. I don't really think it's quite strong enough, or quite funny enough, to fully justify the silliness of the idea, but assuming you can muster up the necessary suspension of disbelief, it's not bad as light and fluffy read. show less

A great tongue-in-cheek look at what might have happened had the dinosaurs not gone extinct, but faked their dying out, disguised themselves and blended in with the humans over the centuries. In this comic "film noire" book, Vincent Rubio is a down-on-his-luck P.I., who also happens to be a velociraptor under his disguise. He investigates an arson case at a hip dino nightclub, and becomes embroiled in events of gathering complexity which threaten to tear aside the curtain of secrecy the dinos have erected against the humans. Great fun.