Even If We Break

Locked-door mysteries are tricky. Done well, they are thrilling reads because you can rarely solve the mystery before the author reveals the answer. Done poorly, they are predictable and painful. I jumped at the change to read Even If We Break by Marieke Nijkamp because I enjoyed another novel of hers and hoped that she would write a good locked-door mystery. It turns out she did not, and the experience was a lot more trying than I expected.

Even If We Break starts well. Ms. Nijkamp works to establish an appropriate setting – remote, mysterious, a grand house that comes with its own ghost story – as well as to introduce the cast of characters. She does well with the setting and with the characters. Like any good locked-door mystery, show more the characters have diverse backgrounds, but their differences do not end there. Ms. Nijkamp adds more diversity in the form of gender identification and sexual preference to make this group as unalike as possible. Sadly, these differences are what weaken the story.

I say this not because the diverse traits of the characters are bad. In fact, that was my favorite aspect of the story. I say this because their differences weaken the premise, which then limits the believability of certain plot points, making the riddle way too easy to solve. The idea that a group of high school students who are no longer friends would agree to get together for a weekend, not to mend fences but to play the game one last time, is one I struggled to accept. It didn’t matter if there was a murder or not, you knew upon a clear explanation of the weekend’s agenda that nothing good could come of it. High school kids rarely make up with former friends so soon after their rifts. It takes the clarity and wisdom of age for that to happen, something graduating seniors still do not have.

Plus, Ms. Nijkamp really hammers this idea of friends growing apart but coming back together in the spirit of forgiveness and solidarity. If half of the plot is about the murder that occurs, the other half is about friendship and what a person’s responsibility is to that friendship when things go sour. It is an odd dichotomy, one I found distracting as well as annoying. Even at the height of the suspense, as the survivors were about to find out who the murderer is, Ms. Nijkamp manages to squeeze in a few paragraphs about friendship. Not exactly what I wanted to read about at that point in the story!

I mentioned the predictability, but I have to stress just how predictable it was. I knew who the murderer was upon the discovery of the first crime, and there were four more to go after that. The mystery aspect of the story reads like a mystery checklist. You can almost see Ms. Nijkamp going down the list to check off each element as she adds it. There is no real attempt to confuse readers; she adds one or two red herrings, but they were obvious as obvious to me as if she had used red font to identify them as such. Again, this is not what you want when reading a mystery.

I had high hopes for Even If We Break. The publisher’s synopsis is fabulous. The problem is that it makes it sound a lot more exciting than it really is. I never felt any of the characters were in danger. In truth, I never really felt for any of the characters in general. I welcome the diversity among them, but I believe Ms. Nijkamp never bothered to develop her characters beyond their differences. Add to that heavy-handed messaging and a mystery that really is not a mystery, and the whole experience is a disappointment. show less

The locked room book. I've been reading a lot of stories with the theme of a former D&D group getting together for one last game so reading a horror version of that was a no-brainer. This is a pretty standard locked-room mystery (locked cabin) and because of that I knew who the killer was pretty soon into the book. What made the book enjoyable even with that knowledge was the personal points of view of the characters, and how deeply thoughtful and emotional they were. This is Marieke Nijkamp's big gifts: Her understanding of trauma that allows her to go deeply into the thoughts and emotions of her characters. That made the book truly eerie and terrifying.

Even If We Break by Marieke Nijkamp is a YA thriller about a group of friends, a role-playing game, and a cabin in the woods (up a mountain). It has strong geeky sensibilities (they are, after all, playing an RPG), but is technically non-SFF, though I expect there's be a lot of SFF fans who would enjoy it regardless.

In this novel, a group of friends go on a last getaway to mend bridges and play one last RPG campaign before some of them go off to college. The story is told through alternating points of view, cycling through all five characters. Aside from being geeky, Even if We Break also has very strong disability and trans representation, dealing with characters in a variety of circumstances.

Nijkamp excels at cramming a lot of action show more into a short space of time, as evidenced by This Is Where It Ends, which is called "54 Minutes" in some translations. Even if We Break is no different. Although the story starts relatively up-beat (aside from the lingering issues the characters are hoping to overcome over the weekend) but quickly become tense as things turn ugly. The five characters all have distinctive voices and I found it easy to keep the different characters straight in my mind.

I recommend Even If We Break to fans of YA thrillers and to people who wished Pretty Little Liars had disability representation and good trans representation. I expect fans of RPGs and LARPs, including readers who don't usually read non-SFF, will still find much to enjoy in reading about the friends' game and the way in which this is linked to the action. I will certainly continue to pick up Nijkamp's books as they come out.

4.5 / 5 stars

You can read more of my reviews on my blog. show less

“Asking for help isn’t failure, it’s strength. It means you trust yourself enough to be flawed and to learn. Because here’s the secret: You don’t have to be infallible. You don’t have to know it all. No one is and no one does.”

I just wanted to share this specific quote because it really hit me and made me do some thinking. It’s so important to allow yourself to be vulnerable and accept our flaws so we can receive and ask for help when needed.

The only reason I didn’t rate this book higher despite loving how it was written and the characters that were represented (especially trans and nonbinary characters being the main focus for the romance aspect of the plot - which I hardly ever see in books) was the fact that I knew show more who was behind the killings from the get-go.

However, I still really enjoyed this book and would read again. show less

Okay, I found the first half of this book to be legitimately terrifying. I couldn’t put it down mainly because I wanted to know what would happen next, but also because I was sort of scared of what would be waiting in the dark for me when I did.

Unfortunately the story was unable to sustain that level of suspense beyond around that halfway mark, and once the sense of immediate danger dropped the book slowed down to a dribble of an ending that lingered for maybe a chapter longer than it needed to. The lack of urgency in later chapters, paired with a climax and conclusion that could be anticipated by someone familiar with the tropes and themes common in other mysteries and thrillers, was definitely somewhat disappointing.

On the other show more hand, I’m definitely a sucker for any story based around an RPG gone awry. That right there gave this book a lot of points to make up what was lost in execution. Overall, an interesting (and super inclusive!) spooky tale. show less

This was a fast-paced, interesting YA mystery thriller. Diverse characters and a suspenseful plot kept me turning the pages, but it was the mystery that kept me hooked. I enjoyed the way the characters' RPG roles intertwined and influenced their realities, but found the game itself a bit distracting (although I'm sure there are people who will love it).

The mysterious ghost story about the cabin was a nice touch - I would have liked to see a little more of this element, if only to keep the reader guessing, as the ending was a little predictable - not enough was done to make everyone a viable suspect. But all in all I enjoyed this story and look forward to her next book!

I received an advanced copy of this book in exchange for an honest show more review. show less

The mountain is hungry. The night has teeth. And both demand to be paid their price in blood. But that’s not your story, tonight. Your story starts on a different peak, a thousand worlds away from here. Your story starts in a tower, where you’ve all gathered. You’ve known one another for years. You’ve grown up together. You claim to be friends, despite the secrets between you.

Based on just the synopsis, I was pretty excited for this read. When I got to the part of the story where they were cosplaying and roleplaying their D&D game, I was a little less excited. I've just never been a cosplayer nor into RP so I was less excited about that aspect. This secondary storyline also made the main plot muddy and confusing at times because show more you couldn't tell - are they RP'ing or did someone just get hurt? It was an odd element to the story.

But the ultimate let down, at least for me, was not understanding the why. This whole horrible event, the secrets that come out - the ultimate secret and explanation was the most confusing and made the least sense. Oh well, I liked the "find your family" theme, because blood relations do not get a free pass to be family if they don't respect and love you like family. show less