Colin Gets Promoted and Dooms the World

Real Rating: 4.25* of five

The Publisher Says: WARNING! Under no circumstances must employees strike a deal with unauthorized personnel on Dark Enterprises property. Such behavior may result in death…or the end of the world.

Colin is a low-level employee at Dark Enterprises, a Hell-like multinational corporation solving the world’s most difficult problems in deeply questionable ways. After years of toiling away in a cubicle, he’s ready to climb the corporate ladder and claim the power he’s never had.

The only problem is, he’s pretty sure he’s about to be terminated. Like, terminated. That’s tough, because his BFF has just set him up with a great guy. In fact, maybe he’s a little too great. And he asks a lot of questions . . show more .

When Colin meets a shadowy figure promising his deepest desire in return for a small, unspecified favor, he can’t resist the urge to fast-track his goals. He asks for the one thing that will improve his life: a promotion.

But that small favor unleashes an ancient evil. People in New York are disappearing, the world might be ending, and Management is starting to notice. Getting to the top is never easy, and now it’s up to Colin to save the world. It’s the ultimate power move, after all.

I RECEIVED A DRC FROM THE PUBLISHER VIA NETGALLEY. THANK YOU.

My Review: Who had "corporate horror comedy" on their 2025 bingo card? Anyone? Well if you did, and be honest! you didn't did you, cover the square. I was pretty lukewarm about Horrorstör, the famously comedic workplace horror novel all y'all were cooing over in 2015, but I give this book a far better, far more amused, rating.

I enjoyed the Everyman at the center of this absurd story of diabolical shenanigans, our blah, sculpted cream cheese MC Colin, because he seemed exactly and precisely the kind of good-enough average white dude who would fall for any trap set for him. He's got no excellence in his being; he's got no interest in better-than, only good-enough; he's so bloodymindedly solipsistic that he scores in negative numbers on any empathy test.

He is, in short, the masked guy in ICEstapo. Practically literally. His actual job is so vile, so over-the-top evil, that his Eichmanning above it all to assume that following orders is somehow exculpatory...well, we know where that got the real Eichmann. One of the few cases where real life gave the world real catharsis, that.

Then Colin meets Eric, his love! Surely he'll be redeemed by luuuv, right? Eric is such a sweet, supportive block of blancmange, he *must* exert a positive influence on cream-cheesy Colin, right? Right?

This story was finely calibrated for my ever-darkening sensibilities. It uses its familiarity of tone and topic to slide into your "amuse-me" centers without pinging an alarm. Then, at some individually-determined point, the penny drops and the game is given away.

A far more effective takedown of the amusement-industrial complex than any strident polemic. Ring a tocsin for the world...we are doomed.

I can't quite get to five stars because, by its nature, the story leads the reader into certain assumptions about its trajectory and gives no indication that the game's afoot. Or if it did I'm too dimwitted to have caught it. The bait-and-switch technique runs the very real risk of switching readers off...I switched off, couldn't figure out why, went off to read some reviews and voilà! All was clear, so I finished it up knowing where I was going. Enjoyed it hugely. (Take that Spoiler Stasi!)

Not really for everyone, perhaps even most; but please, if you do start it, remember that you're **NOT** headed where you think you are.

I recommend it. show less

"I hadn't just freed a hungry, homicidal entity - I'd messed with Management."

What an absolute joy it was to read this book. I found it to be so entertaining (I did not want to put it down), so fun, so funny, and just the right amount of spooky (was on the edge of my seat a couple times, but it wasn't truly scary, which I wouldn't have liked). It also just felt incredibly unique, like nothing I've ever read before. The cover art is also worth noting, as it is gorgeous.

"Everything was going to be amazing, just as soon as I figured out what to do."

I thought this book was mostly very well written, my only complaints being small. I felt the chapters were mostly too long, when it can be nice to have some more built-in stopping points.
It show more sometimes felt like the author was using a thesaurus to find the most difficult word possible, and I'm not sure the word chosen was always the right fit.
I found it a bit unrealistic how many assumptions our main character makes, and how little questions he asks.
There's was also something pretty obvious happening, that it felt a little unrealistic for our main character not to realize; but it's a bit understandable I guess, and didn't take me out of the book or anything.

On the flip side, I love how it felt like we always came to learn things naturally in this story, as opposed to others that immediately spell out who the main characters are, what their relationships are to each other, what they do for work, how they feel about that, etc. No exposition dumps here, which is great.
I also really appreciated that the story we're here for got going right away; no slogging through a few chapters of normalcy before things start happening.
Mainly, the humour. This book made me smile and laugh quite a bit. I find writing that tries to be funny in this sort of off-beat way often comes across as annoying or overly try-hard, but this wasn't like that at all. It was just delightful.

"All I'd wanted was to save myself from certain death and maybe also become powerful beyond my wildest dreams. I didn't think that was unreasonable. Sure, I'd made some ill-advised choices with unforeseen and disastrous consequences, but who doesn't in their twenties?"

I rarely enjoy characters this flawed (especially when they're our main character), but I could never fully find myself hating Colin. He was quite unlikeable at times, but you never find him to be a wholly bad person, even when he makes it clear he's not looking for redemption. He was always entertaining and always funny, and I think it's such a testament to the writing that I felt I could still understand him, even in the least understandable of situations.
I also loved the "Thing", our main "villain". I was so excited whenever it showed up. So interesting, and spooky, and curious. I especially loved the choice of giving it it's own font. It really added something special to it's appearances.

"Even with my life in mortal peril, I'd never been hornier."

Thankfully, the main relationship of the book was also a win. I could nitpick a few things, but for the most part I found them cute and believable, and enjoyed where their storyline went.
The side characters are also well done, the best being Lex, Colin's new friend. I wish we got a bit more in depth with them, but I understand that wasn't the story. (Would love a companion piece and/or sequel, tbh.)

"Time stopped. Not literally, though that would have been cool."

Lastly, the ending. Endings are hard, and I might be hard to please, but while I didn't find this to be perfect, I was absolutely fine with it. I don't think anyone would finish this book feeling unsatisfied, making it very easy to recommend. I really can't imagine regretting reading it; I had such a good time! show less

Series Info/Source: This is a stand alone book. I got this on ebook to review through NetGalley

Thoughts: I wanted to like this, but I was really struggling. It's not bad, it's just not really good either. I've read way too many of these books where a strangely normal person works at a huge evil corporation and gets themselves in trouble someway or another. It's strangely cutesy, kind of horrific, and for some reason, it was completely boring to me. I read the first 30% of this and realized I was just completely disengaged from the story. I didn't like Colin, I didn't like anyone around him; I thought the premise was corny and far-fetched, and was completely uninterested in finishing this. I have a lot of review books to get through show more right now so I decided to DNF this; giving this 3 stars like I normally do for DNFs because who knows maybe the last two thirds of this were amazing.

The story follows Colin, a low-level employee at Dark Enterprises who has been bullied pretty much his whole life. He just never stood up for himself and thought working for an insanely evil corporation like Dark Enterprises might give him a step up in life. However, Colin is still just a data analyst, and now he's being bullied by his manager. That is until a dark entity offers to give Colin whatever he wants in exchange for a teeny favor. What Colin wants is power; what he asks for is a promotion. The teeny favor he pays for the promotion ends up being a bit more impactful than he thought.

I always think I am going to enjoy these types of darkly humorous books about ordinary people working for evil corporations or entities or even taking on traditionally dark roles, but a lot of them fall flat for me. There are a few stand outs; Murderbot series by Martha Wells, some William Gibson books, Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson, or Starter Villain by John Scalzi. However, there are a lot that miss the mark for me, like The Mountain in the Sea by Ray Naylor, How to Become a Dark Lord and Die Trying by Django Wrexler, among others. This one missed the mark for me.

Colin is just dull, and I think that is kind of the point. He is dull but also a complete butt. Even when he is being evil, he doesn't really even put a lot of oomph into it. The whole thing comes off as very... boring. I didn't like him, and I didn't like anyone else in this book. I honestly couldn't care less what happens to any of these characters.

Also, a lot of this is just so, well, silly. The dark sacrifices...wow...so surprising how that was dealt with. The dangerous working atmosphere that seems standardized while the corporation tries to stay up to code and maintain policies. Rather than come off as funny, it felt more tired and silly to me. I just didn't enjoy it. As someone who has worked corporately a good portion of my life, I somewhat appreciated the tongue-in-cheek here. However, the whole thing went past funny into the stupid and silly region for me.

This is easy to read, and if you enjoy this type of over the top blandness punctuated with scenes of intense gore and suffering, then this might be for you. I usually enjoy dark humor and poking fun at corporations. Unfortunately, between the unlikable characters, how boring this was, and how contrived everything felt, I just had no pull or desire to read this book.

My Summary (3/5): Overall I wasn't a huge fan. The writing is fine and easy to read. However, the characters were bland and boring despite their horrific actions. The plot was slow, and the world here just seems contrived. This wasn't a story I enjoyed, and wasn't one I was sucked in to...rather it was one I kept avoiding picking up and finishing. If you enjoy the types of stories involving normal people who get pulled into incredibly evil situations in a dark humor type of way, you might enjoy this. For me, those types of stories are very hit and miss, and unfortunately, this was a miss for me. show less

Colin Gets Promoted and Dooms the World
by Mark Waddell
Oh my Gosh! This is so hilarious all the way through! Non-stop crazy! I giggled and laughed out loud so many times! This is a must-read!
This poor guy is tired of dating and tired of getting bullied. Job issues and dating issues, what could be worse?
Suddenly he gets a great job and a great-looking guy is paying attention to him. Wow! Things are looking up. Until he finds out who he works for. That quitting isn't a healthy option. He needs to find a way out. He needs a secret weapon. Oh boy, does he find one! Now the world is doomed. Now he has to stop it!
If Lucy, from I Love Lucy, were a spy, and the world depended on her...
This might have been the way things would go down!
I have show more got to say, I haven't laughed at a book so much in a very long time. I am giggling while I am writing this just thinking of some scenes. I am very thankful to the publisher and NetGalley for letting me read this hilarious book. show less

This book has everything I don't like: doom, demons, jealousy, and the possibiliity of armaggedon. It just wasn't for me. There were some good parts - friendship and love connections, but overall, I just wasn't into the whole destroy the world theme. Yes, I know it is in the title, but I was hoping for something more humorous. Instead I got employees competing for promotions, demons and warring factions, demon eaters, and disappearing people.
Sorry, but I wasn't a fan.