Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies
by Michael J. Bader
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Description
"Sexual Fantasies. Everyone has them, but no one knows what they mean. People are curious about and often confused by the things that arouse them, yet they are often too ashamed to reveal their most private fantasies to their partners or even their therapists. In this fascinating and provocative book, Dr. Michael J. Bader offers a groundbreaking theory of sexual desire, one that will liberate men and women and enable them to better understand their sexual preferences." "Drawing on his show more twenty-five years as a psychotherapist and psychoanalyst, Dr. Bader demonstrates that rather than being programmed by biology or society, sexual fantasies and preferences are really psychological antidotes to unconscious dangers. Armed with this novel theory, men and women will no longer need to feel ashamed about what arouses them or confused about what arouses others. Dr. Bader sensitively tells the stories of his patients and explains the meaning of their sexual fantasies. In terms refreshingly free of jargon, he reveals how his profound new theory can be used to decipher a wide variety of sexual fantasies and behavior, ranging from ordinary preferences about positions in bed to flamboyant scenarios worthy of the Marquis de Sade. And yet Dr. Bader's exciting new theory transcends the realm of individual psychology. Readers will come away with a radically new understanding of such issues as sexual chemistry and boredom, cybersex, pornography, and the differences in how men and women get excited."--Jacket. show lessTags
Recommendations
Member Reviews
It's an insightful read and the case studies help paint a clearer picture of what's what. Identifying your pathogenic beliefs seems easy enough after reading this book. The hard part is mitigating them. More people should read this.
The only fault I could find is its redundancy, but this is a common issue with most self-help books.
The only fault I could find is its redundancy, but this is a common issue with most self-help books.
Ratings
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Lists
Men's healing resources
712 works; 1 member
Healing resources
124 works; 1 member
sex and love addiction
5 works; 1 member
Healing resources for women
587 works; 1 member
Author Information
3 Works 152 Members
Common Knowledge
- Epigraph
- There is a boundary to men's passions when they act from feelings; but none when they are under the influence of imagination.
--John Barrymore
Sex: The pleasure is momentary, the position ridiculous, and the expense damnable.
--Lord Chesterfield - Dedication
- For Margot
- First words
- A woman I was treating in psychotherapy - I'll call her Jan - reported that she frequently had this fantasy while making love with her husband.
- Last words
- (Click to show. Warning: May contain spoilers.)We can make rational sense of erotic life and still enjoy its mysteries.
- Blurbers
- Friday, Nancy; Chernin, Kim; Rubin, Lillian B.
Classifications
- Genres
- Nonfiction, General Nonfiction, Sexuality and Gender Studies
- DDC/MDS
- 306.77 — Social sciences Social sciences, sociology & anthropology Culture and institutions Sexual relations Sexual and related practices
- LCC
- HQ31 .B185 — Social sciences The family. Marriage, Women and Sexuality The Family. Marriage. Women Sexual life Sex instruction and sexual ethics
- BISAC
Statistics
- Members
- 113
- Popularity
- 284,020
- Reviews
- 1
- Rating
- (4.32)
- Languages
- English, Italian
- Media
- Paper, Ebook
- ISBNs
- 6
- ASINs
- 1
