My Misspent Youth: Essays

I don't know why I identified with Daum. Maybe I'm also obsessed with the trappings of life rather than its substance. I, too, pick my dreams based on a material understanding of things -- I strive for a life of hardwood floors, intellectual conversations -- a life of doing things for the sake of living. I related to all of her essays, even the snarky, supercilious ones -- especially those. It's too bad that so many of GR reviewers vilified the snobbishness in the writing -- because that's what I thought made Daum so strong. She swung into every essay with her own predetermined set of opinions and attitudes and used them to transport the reader into her life, to see things from her viewpoint. And even then, she even disclaims about her show more own snobbishness -- she was, in fact, one of those Music Is My Bag kids, she was one of those losers who fall in love with an Internet persona, she was one of those people buried in thousands of dollars of debt. This entire collection exclaims, "I'm imperfect -- in fact, like the world around me, I'm pretty shitty."

It's original and honest in a way not many books are. The style is smooth, fresh, cutting in a way that made me snigger. Daum's one of those writers who gets to the heart of her subjects -- or at least to the heart of her feelings on the subject -- which is something commendable. When discussing the family/colony of polyamorous lovers, she's not dismissive of their polyamory -- she's dismissive of how almost sheltered their lives are. show less

3 stars ONLY because her writing style is fantastic. I love how she analyzes her life and how she got to where she is, but some of these essays just irked the shit out of me. She talks of writing things that are true and not true, so I'm hoping that more than a few of the details are false, written just for the thought process and shock value of those who staunchly disagree with her alleged thoughts.

I listened this book of essays on recommendation of Slate magazine's best audiobooks of 2015 article (although the essays were largely published more than 15 years ago leading to a time warp sensation hearing them). The first few essays are largely autobiographical and detail Daum's personal experiences with online romance, working in the publishing industry, running up debt to follow her dreams of living New York City, and her hatred of carpets and love of wood floors. In these essays she comes across as a rather shallow and negative person. Later essays have more of a literary journalism feel including a documentation of the everyday lives of flight attendants and interviews with the polyamorous Ravenheart family. While I like these show more essays better, Daum remains overly sarcastic and dismissive of her subjects in a manner I suppose is intended to be "edgy." So I didn't like this book much, but it was a quick read and Xe Sands' narration skills are excellent. show less

There are moments of great insight and attentiveness throughout, and some wonderful turns of phrase, but the voice is young and a bit angry and a bit muddled. I can't decide whether "American Shiksa" is brilliant or a bit offensive. But her later collection of essays, the Unthinkable, is sublime, which actually makes this kind of heartening to read -- see the difference that thirteen years makes.

If you read a favorite author deeply enough, and if she's written enough books, you will eventually hit a dud. These are dated essays which don't hang together well. I already know about what Daum is trying to share here, through her other, better books and essay collections.

When I finished the first essay in this book I thought I'd never make it through the rest. I felt it lacked emotion, but then I remembered that these were essays, not memoirs, and I enjoyed the rest of the book. The essay that really turned my opinion was on flight attendants. I don't the book was as edgy or biting as some reviewers have, but that may be because I'm fairly cynical myself. I would recommend this book to anyone who likes to read good magazine articles and doesn't mind reading someone else's opinion on life instead of clinging to their own like a life preserver on a sinking ship.

The title essay is excellent. The rest rub me the wrong way. Too much of a Gen X "lol nothing matters" ethos.