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Is It a Choice?: Answers to 300 of the Most Frequently Asked Questions… (1993)

by Eric Marcus

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414548,321 (3.92)2
The answers to all the questions you've ever had about homosexuality but were afraid to ask are finally in one book, Is It a Choice ? In this newly revised and updated edition, Eric Marcus provides insightful, no-nonsense answers to hundreds of the most commonly asked questions about homosexuality. Offering frank insight on everything you've always wanted-and needed-to know about same-gender relationships, coming out, family roles, politics, and much more, including: How do you know if you're gay or lesbian? What should you do if your child is gay or lesbian? Do gay parents raise gay children? If you think a friend is gay or lesbian, what should you say? Why do gay men and women want to get married? What does the Bible say about homosexuality?… (more)
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Showing 5 of 5
Excellent resource for those with some acquaintance with gays and lesbians and the issues facing them, their friends and family who want to know more. Assumes that the reader knows nothing, so also an excellent resource for someone who knows nothing at all about gay and lesbian issues. ( )
  bness2 | May 23, 2017 |
Is It a Choice?: Answers to the Most Frequently Asked Questions About Gay and Lesbian People by Eric Marcus. Epiphany-OviedoELCA library section 8 L: Life Skills, Self-Esteem/Life Challenges/Special Needs. If and when your child, grandchild, aunt, student, friend or colleague comes out of the closet to you, you are going to need all the correct information you can get about sexual orientation, like...YESTERDAY! This fine book removes all the mystery and much of the fear surrounding this life challenge. After presenting basic definitions, Marcus moves on to address parents of gay children, and then covers work, the military, where gay people live, socializing, sports, education, media issues, activism and aging. All of this information is the real deal. I know, because we have beloved gay members of our family, and if you look hard enough, I’ll bet you do too!
Those of us brought up in the ‘50s, taught that varying sexual orientations were wrong or sinful, may at first be uncomfortable reading this information. I encourage you to stick with it. It will help to read one chapter at a time in order to digest the information more slowly. And realize that your discomfort is not one one-hundredth of the discomfort that gay people feel as they struggle every day to retain their physical safety, courage, and human dignity as they deal with hatred, bullying, harassment, firings, vandalism and violence in this discriminatory society.
Read this for the gay kid in your long-ago school room whom everyone taunted and for whom perhaps you did not stand up in support. Do it for those you DID stand up for! Do it for your bachelor uncle who might have been gay but never had the confidence or family support to come out.
Gayness happens in all families – just like yours, just like mine. Gays and lesbians are our beloved children, aunts, uncles and parents. The great thing is: if you have read this information you will know exactly what to say when someone comes out to you. What you say will either make that person feel accepted and cherished, and cement your friendship or family tie forever, OR could push them over the edge into alcohol or drug abuse, or suicide, to make the pain of your disappointment and anger stop. Believe me, the first result is the healthiest because it saves lives, but also because it is a relief to be working with the truth. I know this from experience with many gay family members and friends. Reading this book will help you accept (and eventually celebrate) that truth with an open mind, compassion and grace.
Since the ELCA now allows gay, lesbian, and bisexual ministers in committed relationships to serve as ELCA ministers, it behooves us as an ELCA congregation to be welcoming to all people, regardless of sexual orientation. Jesus, our model, welcomed all people, and so must we. Sexual orientation, whether straight, gay or bisexual, is not in itself sinful; but the way we treat our gay family members and partners can be either sinful or holy. God hopes we will uphold dignity rather than disrespect, commitment rather than faithlessness, love rather than rejection. God says he will judge us to the exact extent we judge others, so I prefer to err on the side of love. God is love. The Holy Spirit will help us spread God's love to all.
Dear Abby says, “The answers to all the questions you’ve ever had about homosexuality but were afraid to ask are finally in one book, Is It a Choice?” This book has been a great help to so many people; I hope it will be for you too. ( )
  Epiphany-OviedoELCA | Sep 15, 2011 |
"In this newly revised edition, Eric Marcus provides insightful, non-nonsense answers to hundreds of the most commonly asked questions about homosexuality. Offering frank insight on everything you've always wanted--and needed--to know about same-gender relationships, coming out, family roles, politics, and much more, including: How do you know if you're gay or lesbian?, What should you do if your child is gay or lesbian?, Do gay parents raise gay children?, If you think a friend is gay or lesbian, what should you say?, Why do gay men and women want to get married?, What does the Bible say about homosexuality?" -- Back cover
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1 vote | PFLAGCantonSLC | Apr 17, 2008 |
Very informative Q&A book about gays and lesbians, with political and sexual questions and everything in between. I have gone back to this book multiple times over the last few years, it really is very informative and interesting. ( )
1 vote Heather19 | Oct 19, 2007 |
A Q/A book examining some of the issues surrounding homosexuality, including what "causes" it, what religions say about it, the history of the Gay pride movement, and some of the political aspects of it. Good read for anyone needing a good look at some of the issues in the gay community, written primarily for straights. ( )
1 vote kaelirenee | Mar 17, 2007 |
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The answers to all the questions you've ever had about homosexuality but were afraid to ask are finally in one book, Is It a Choice ? In this newly revised and updated edition, Eric Marcus provides insightful, no-nonsense answers to hundreds of the most commonly asked questions about homosexuality. Offering frank insight on everything you've always wanted-and needed-to know about same-gender relationships, coming out, family roles, politics, and much more, including: How do you know if you're gay or lesbian? What should you do if your child is gay or lesbian? Do gay parents raise gay children? If you think a friend is gay or lesbian, what should you say? Why do gay men and women want to get married? What does the Bible say about homosexuality?

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