The Sweet By and By: A Novel

Todd Johnson has written a moving tale of what it means to grow older, facing not only the end of a life, but also of the physical and mental infirmities that often times accompany and dehumanize the elderly in so many small ways. In drawing his portraits of the five main characters, compassionate nursing home LPN Lorraine, demanding Margaret whose body has become a traitor to her will, Bernice who has retreated most of the time into dementia in order to escape her overwhelming grief, Rhonda who intends for her hairdressing job at the retirement home to be a fleeting occasion but who learns about love and caring from her ladies there, and Lorraine's daghter April who not only dares to dream but works to make her dreams a reality, show more Johnson has created a gentle and bittersweet novel.

Narrated in the voices of four of the five women, Johnson has not only managed to write one believable female character but to write five of them. He weaves humor and pathos in equal measure and quietly focuses on the indignities of aging that come for all of us lucky enough to accumulate many years on this planet of ours. There is no shying away from the ways in which aging isn't pretty or comfortable or easy. And there is a definite ackowledgment of the rage against the inevitable. But as the narrative runs throughout the years of these women's lives, their attitudes, their kindnesses, and the love that they show each other highlight the ways in which we can all maintain dignity and spunk to the very end no matter how bowed the bodies and how forgetful the minds.

Anyone who has cared for an aging parent or grandparent will see the sharp reflections of truth in the everyday existences of these characters. While there might be no grand denouement, just the business of waking up every day and moving forward for these characters makes this a wonderful and poignant read. Often narrated in a bit of Southern dialect, the five women are quite different representations of Southern womenhood but they gell despite their differences and the result is a thoroughly Southern novel which will appeal to anyone who likes their novels with a bit of that trademarked Southern sass and verve. The book chronicles the quiet march of time and brings the reader to care deeply for all the women as they age and especially as the elders leave the stage to the increasingly stooped middle generation. Johnson has truly created a quiet gem of a novel. show less

Whether it’s the sentimentality of Mother’s Day coming up, or thoughts of my own aging, I don’t know, but this book really spoke to me, and then whispered in my thoughts, and swirled through my dreams.

The twining paths of five southern women, their stories told in alternating chapters in the voices of four of their number, the fifth no longer lucid. Lorraine is an aide at a nursing home where Margaret and Bernice now live. Rhonda is a beautician who comes once a week to the home, and April is Lorraine’s daughter. The chapters move quickly through time – the young grow up and have careers, the elderly pass on, the middle aged become elderly. Their hopes and dreams, their pasts and memories, what they’ve lived through, what show more they learn from one another, gently, gracefully told. Listen to me trying to explain about this story when I don’t have the words that this author does (who, by the way, did a remarkable job of giving voices to all these women). If this sounds like a story you’d be interested in, please read some of the quotes I’ve added to the Common Knowledge page. You won’t be disappointed. show less

This is such a profound book on so many levels that everyone should read it. One astonishing fact is that the author is a male, writing about females with exquisite sensitivity and insight, and not just any females -- elderly females and a couple younger ones.

The book is written from the viewpoints of the 5 main characters: two aging women in a nursing home, their main caregiver, a hairdresser who works part time at the nursing home, and the daughter of the caregiver. No, this may not sound like exquisite reading but it is. Todd Johnson is a master of words. This story may change how you think about old age and other ages as well. It may change how you treat people and what you decide to do sometimes. The story is charming, funny, sad, show more upbeat, revealing, and profound. And it's oh so real.

I hope this author writes many more books. show less

This was a beautifully written book.The bonds of friendship, realities of aging, and family relationships are woven into this story so masterfully. I know that is sounds gender biased, but I am surprised that a man has written this story. Anyone that has an aging parent or grandparent to care for should read this book.

I really enjoy stories that give you a bit of Southern flair, and The Sweet By and By sure delivered! Each chapter in this story is narrated by one of the main characters in the novel, which gives us an opportunity to watch each woman grow in her own way. They become connected by the time they spend together in a nursing home, so a couple of the characters are elderly residents. Margaret is one of the residents that seems to be mentally intact but physically limited while everyone is sure that Bernice has lost her marbles.

Johnson puts us right in the minds of these nursing home residents and helps us to realize what they may be feeling inside. To realize how frustrating it must be for these people who have always lived productive and show more healthy lives, only to be slowed down by age and weakness, can be humbling to us as readers because we will all be in the same boat some day....God willing!

Lorraine is an LPN at the nursing home where both Margaret and Bernice reside. We find out bits and pieces of Lorraine's life, including some of the burdens that she has had to learn to live with. I think that the loss that Lorraine endured early in her life helped her to become the compassionate person that is needed to be a successful nurse that cares for the elderly. She devotes her life to the people she takes care of knowing that the time they will have together will be short-lived. It really takes a special person to open your heart to so many people knowing that your time together will not be as long as most relationships.

I really enjoyed Rhonda's place in the story because she just kind of fell into her place as a hairdresser at the nursing home. I think that Rhonda planned on just trying out the job for a day and expected to not enjoy it, so she wasn't planning on returning. She found herself connecting with the residents and developed a special bond with both Margaret and Bernice. Since Rhonda was never able to develop a relationship with her own mother it was heart-warming to see her open up in this way to these women. I probably related to Rhonda the most considering that I lost my own mother when I was quite young, so I've had my own special ladies that I look up to in this fashion.

My mother was an LPN herself at a local nursing home so I really was able to connect with this story. I've been walking in and out of nursing homes since I have been three years old and it is so important to remember that all of these people are individuals that helped bring your community to what it is today. My grandma has been in the nursing home since before Christmas and although we are hoping she will be coming home this month, we know the care that she does receive is excellent. My grandma loves to repeat her stories and this book reminded me that it is important to allow her to do that. I'm sure there is so much more that she wants to remember so it is important to allow her the freedom to share what does come to her mind.

I really loved this story and the writing was written in such a way that came across as beautiful prose. I think it would also make a great book club selection and you can bet that I will be passing this one on to the gals in my group. With themes of love, aging, compassion and letting go, this book has a lot to offer beneath the surface. show less

This story is told from the perspective of five women. Margaret and Bernice are residents of a nursing home. Lorraine is an LPN who cares for the residents, and Rhonda does their hair. April, Lorraine's daughter, also contributes her voice a few times. For the most part, this is a sweet, well-told story, but it is a bit uneven. The chapters told from the perspective of Margaret and Bernice are wonderful! Johnson captures the thoughts and fears of these two women beautifully. Some of their stories are wickedly funny, others are bittersweet. When Bernice crawls into bed with Margaret one night when they neither one can sleep, I smiled and cried all at the same time.

I also enjoyed Lorraine's part of the story. Anyone who cares for Bernice show more and Margaret with so much respect is someone to be admired. Throughout the book, Lorraine also grows older and eventually ends up being cared for by her daughter April. But Lorraine (and her friend Althea) never lose their spunk.

The voices of the younger characters, Rhonda and April, didn't feel quite as distinct. These parts of the book told a nice story, but it was the perspectives of Bernice, Margaret, and Lorraine that felt unique and authentic. show less

A story about southern black American women focusing on two women who live in a nursing home, and their carers and relatives. My mother lives in a nursing home, so there was some direct relevance to me, but this (audiobook version) didn't really connect well with me. I thought it was quite well written and the characters and situations were very real, based on my experience. Perhaps the cultural contrast was too off-putting for me. Although it wasn't a great read, it certainly kept my interest enough to while away the time on my 2 and 3 hour nocturnal runs.