The Hitman's Guide to Housecleaning

This is a variant of a classic formula very popular in Hollywood: the bad guy on the run arrives in a small, peaceful community, and, supported by the Love of a Good Woman and the good advice of wise Father and Mother figures, builds a new life for himself as an honest citizen. But he still has one last, decisive confrontation with the ghosts of his past to deal with before the film ends.

Hallgrímur is clearly interested in this idea mainly by the scope it gives him for looking at Iceland through the eyes of someone as incongruous as possible to Icelandic society, the New York-based Croatian Mafia hitman Tomislav Boksic, alias Toxic, formed by the unspeakable atrocities he took part in as a youngster during the Balkan wars and proud of show more his professional, detached and efficient approach to murder. He's on the run from the Feds after his 67th hit went wrong, and has somehow ended up in Reykjavik assuming the identity of a televangelist from Virginia.

Needless to say, Hallgrímur — who wrote the book in English first, then translated it into Icelandic — has endless fun letting Tomislav narrate in exaggerated, pastiche Raymond Chandler noir language, in the most impeccably bad taste. In the audiobook, the corny cod-Balkan accent Luke Daniels uses for Tomislav feels exactly right, and enhances the effect. Inevitably, Tomislav also has his own Balkan slant on Hlynur Björn's most tasteless running joke (cf. [101 Reykjavik]) — he gives every woman he sees a score based on the number of nights it would take before he started dreaming about her, if he were stuck in an army camp where she was the only woman.

Tomislav seems so extremely divorced from any kind of moral universe we could identify with that at first it's like looking at Iceland through the eyes of a Martian, but of course Hallgrímur gradually humanises him as we go on through the story, trying to get us to the point where we start asking ourselves whether we would have turned out any differently from him if we'd been plunged into the middle of a civil war in our teens. Perhaps fortunately, he doesn't quite take us along with him that far, but Tomislav does turn out to be a long way from being the cardboard cutout he seems in the opening pages of the book. The other characters also quietly subvert the stereotypes the plot seems to be asking for: Tomislav's ice-princess/anima, Gunnhildur, has all sorts of important character flaws, including the inability to keep her apartment tidy that gives Hallgrímur the hook for his title; the older generation of Icelandic Evangelicals who offer Tomislav salvation all turn out to be very damaged people themselves, but not necessarily the worse for that.

And, what's more, the book contains at least two important life-lessons for anyone intending to visit Iceland: (i) don't even think of keeping your shoes on indoors, unless they cost more than 200 dollars; and (ii) if the doorbell rings during Eurovision you probably shouldn't answer it. show less

Toxic, bisher erfolgreicher kroatischer Auftragskiller aus New York, erwischt bei seinem letzten Job einen FBI-Agenten. Da nun der Teufel los ist, flieht er auf dem schnellsten Weg und landet als amerikanischer Fernsehprediger in Island. Ehe er es sich versieht, steckt er mittendrin in seiner Rolle als Geistlicher und becirct nicht nur isländische Gläubige…
Schräg, schräger, am schrägsten ;-). Dass bei einem solchen Titel einen kein ‚normaler‘ Krimi erwartet, leuchtet ein. Aber es ist auch kein Unnormaler sondern gar keiner, vielmehr eher die Beschreibung einer Läuterung eines immens großen Sünders. Was sich nun vielleicht fade und öde anhören mag, wird jedoch bei einem Autor wie Helgason zu einem skurrilen wie auch show more witzigen Leseerlebnis.
Toxic, der vor seiner Laufbahn als Killer Soldat in Kroatien war, ist der Icherzähler mit einem äußerst lockeren wie auch vulgären Tonfall. Er beschreibt Island, das ihm zuvor völlig unbekannt war, aus der Sicht eines Kämpfers (‚Was ist mit diesen Isländern los? Keine Armee. Keine Pistolen. Kein Nix.‘) wie auch eines Großstadtmenschen (‚Der Dom ist so groß wie eine Hundehütte Gottes.‘) und erzählt nebenbei noch aus seinen früheren Leben. Wie ihm der Eurovision Song Contest das Leben rettete, wie er aus Versehen seinen Vater erschoss, wie er seine Morde vorbereitete (‚‘Das Opfer ist König‘ ist mein Motto.‘), wie er den Krieg erlebte (‚In unserer Einheit haben wir fünf Leben verloren, sechs Beine, drei Arme und ein paar Finger.‘). Es sind schreckliche Dinge über die er berichtet, aber dies macht er mit einer solch scheinbaren Selbstverständlichkeit und Direktheit in einer derart ungewohnten Sprache, dass man immer wieder lachen muss.
Trotz der vielen Geschichten aus der Vergangenheit Toxics bleibt die aktuelle Story, der Aufenthalt in Island, spannend. Dazu noch eine Liebesgeschichte und ein überraschender Schluss - einfach gelungen. Die volle Punktzahl gibt es nur deshalb nicht, weil es gelegentlich doch ein bisschen sehr schräg war. show less

Funny, crude, thought provoking, tragic and uplifting. I'm not sure what I was expecting when I started this but it definitely wasn't what I actually read. I'm not sure I can actually say much about the book without spoiling it.

But here are some things I can say. It was very well written. It uses first person present POV, which if you're familiar with my reviews, you'll know I usually loathe. It was however the perfect tense here. The main character was more of a narrator than is typically the case when authors use this tense. Toxic was telling you his personal story and the fourth wall was pretty malleable and thin. It wasn't to the level of 'dear reader' though. I greatly enjoyed the main character's voice. He was extremely crude show more though so if you're easily offended this book is not for you. I laughed out loud in places. I ultimately found myself rooting for him even though he was a very bad guy.

This story dealt with some weighty topics, PTSD, sin, death and redemption. The hero was a man whose life circumstances had made him what he was. The story illustrated how a person's life can slip into unintended paths. Some weighty questions were raised. Who is worthy of redemption? Does turning over a new leaf and becoming Christian get you off the hook for any evil you've done?

Lastly, woven through the action was a lovely description of Iceland. The author's words painted a clear picture of a desolate northern country that never the less was clearly beautiful. It certainly made me want to visit.

This book is marketed as a mystery thriller but it isn't in my opinion. It is straight general fiction and I can see it as being a very interesting book club selection. show less

I got sucked in --what a cool premise! A hit man whose job goes badly and he finds himself mistaken for a priest in Iceland--the perfect cover, but can he pull it off? I listened to this as a recorded book and loved the reader's voice. Super.

Things I liked: seemed like a fresh, original story--certainly one where you couldn't predict the outcome. The protagonist is compelling and well-fleshed out. I was torn between being sympathetic but then angry at some of the choices he made. He was darker than I expected, but it made sense considering his past.

The protagonist has a earthy sense of humor I enjoyed and terrific use of language.

Hovered between a four and a five for me... four only because it was dark-ish and I did get a bit lost show more somewhere in the last third before the ending. Likely my fault as I was driving and listening. Must have missed something. show less

I was intrigued by the title of this book and usually enjoy Nordic and European mysteries. The plot of The Hitman's Guide to Housekeeping looked pretty interesting. Tomislav Boksae, or Toxic as he calls himself, is a professional hitman from Croatia. His latest kill brings the entire weight of the world on his head when his victim turns out to be an FBI agent. Soon the feds get a little too close so to save himself, Toxic kills another man and takes on his identity.

It's not until his plane lands in Iceland that Toxic realizes he's now impersonating an American TV preacher, Father Friendly. Iceland is unlike anywhere he has ever been before. The days and nights are endless and it has a zero homicide rate. He will find himself a fish out show more of water in a country with no army, no guns, barely any police where he must confront his own need for redemption.

Helgason apparently wrote the book in English. His other novels were translated from Icelandic to English which may account for the book's unusual turn of phrase now and again. I thought this would be more of a Donald Westlake kind of humorous novel and that's probably why I didn't enjoy it much. It's very crude and I think at least 75% of the population would be offended by some of the actions taken by the main character.

On the positive side, the author's take on Icelandic names was hilarious. That's not a reason to read the book in my opinion. show less

I enjoyed this story so much! Toxic, the main character and our hitman, is not a very likeable person, but he tells a story with a very quirky sense of humour and some of the descriptions were so funny I had trouble in keeping a straight face when reading (I mostly read this book while travelling, so on a train or on the plane). The ending is also...unusual, and how odd is it that just a week before the Eurovision Song Contest I should read here about a nation that retires in their home on the day of the Eurovision? Too funny...!
This book could be made into a good movie...lots of swearing, explicit language, maybe something for the Cohen brothers? :)
Once finished the book, I was curios so ordered "101 Reykjavik", which arrived show more yesterday. I look forward to reading it! show less

Why did I read it? "The Hitman's Guide to Housecleaning" appeared on a list of items available for review and the synopsis provided sounded interesting, made more interesting by the fact it was the author's first book in English, his own translation no less. I was foolish, however, and chose another book in it's stead.

Synopsis: Tomislav Bokšić is a New York resident, Croatian-born hitman with 60 odd successful jobs, who is very comfortable with his work, and his girlfriend Munita. After his last kill is uncovered as a FBI agent, "Toxic", as he is better known, finds himself in hiding in Iceland, boarding with a born-again Christian couple, having taken the life, and identity of Father Friendly at JFK airport when his assigned show more alternate identity became known by the authorities and he was threatened with capture.

What did I like? "The Hitman's Guide to Housecleaning" is narrated in first person by Toxic, a rude, crude, blunt (Croatian mafia) man whose language is riddled with four-letter words, and other profanities, often employed in interesting combinations - English being his second (or is that third) language. Toxic's spoken language, edited through his own social filter, is marginally better than his uncensored thoughts. Toxic redeems himself though in providing a different point of view from the average man in his perception, and description of his environment. Then again, Toxic's life is very different from your average novel reader: he is living under an assumed name, in a foreign country, because he chose to be in the homicide business but made, one, big mistake. As much as it is can be hard to like Toxic, or his the opinions he expresses of certain people, his arrangement of English words to describe his situation, his surroundings and the people he encounters is inspired, and lends him (his thoughts rather) a certain appeal. Toxic certainly provides a unique view of Iceland, being a tourist, a fugitive and in hiding.

[I found it hard to empathise with Toxic, but I certainly enjoyed his own narration of his life. ]

Yes, "The Hitman's Guide to Housecleaning" is dark, and the use of profanities is frequent; but this is all part of the charm of this book. The clash between Toxic's world and that of his born-again Christian hosts only adds to the humour as he tries to suppress his natural language and behaviour in order to project the image of Father Friendly; his randomly chosen alias. Most of the characters pop from the book, and can be encountered in the real, everyday, if not mundane world. Well, maybe it would be a unique experience to notice a Croatian hitman out and about on the streets, but the other characters perhaps. So, the story felt far-fetched and grounded at the same time.

It is astonishing that this is Hallgrímur Helgason's first book in English, and if I had not read this as part of the blurb, I would never have guessed. It's marvellous writing, at least in audio format.

The narration by Luke Daniels is wonderful. I cannot be sure of the accuracy of the accents, but the speaking patterns Mr. Daniels chose to use for certain characters just added to the charm of the overall story. Mr. Daniels also employed some clever, comic timing, too. The overall audio was clear and there were no problems whatsoever with the format provided by Audible.

What didn't I like? Oh dear. The end. The last few minutes of this book were so disappointing. All the while I was listening, I was wondering where it would all end. What I didn't expect was to get there and think, "Huh? That's it?".

Mr. Helgason: You write this wonderful book, include these great characters, infuse it with sometimes bizarre, but credible humour surrounding life, death, criminals, and a tourist's view of Iceland, and this is how you choose to finish the story? WTF?

Would I recommend it? Despite the let down at the finale, I would recommend "The Hitman's Guide to Housecleaning" to others; however, I would do so with the following caveats:

1. I am not joking when I say Toxic uses a lot of profanity, though often in a unique way. "F^ck" was found three times in a single sentence, and, at one point, there is a very colourful expression referring to coitus with a dead matron's corpse utilising the space which ought to be occupied by the left mammary gland, but with much more colourful language employed. That said, it is nothing you cannot hear out on the streets (yoof culture, etc.). It will not be to everyone's taste.


2. Toxic's world is the criminal world, and the violent side at that. Do expect violence and cruelty in the book, delivered with a line which might be used by James Bond to take the edge off, but which may also seem cold and callous.

If you're okay with the above, then read, or listen to "The Hitman's Guide to Housecleaning". It's funny, it's offensive, it's charming, it's amusing, it's a damn good read from a new (to English) writer. I'll be listening again. show less