The Bride Stripped Bare

A fascinating, thought provoking and raw book that takes a look at one woman yet I think probably represents many women in the modern world.
This is a quasi-diary of a woman who questions herself and her sexuality, wondering why it is that for her sex is more about pleasing her partner than gaining any physical pleasure herself, and if she can change this. She embarks on an affair that changes her life profoundly, not only in that it opens her up to thinking about sexual pleasure in a new way, but thinking about life and how she is living it.
This book reminded me a lot of Josephine Hart's 'Damage'. Like that book 'The Bride Stripped Bare' is an exercise in dry, stripped prose used to describe something full and sensual. Also like show more 'Damage' I found that this is one of the few pieces of erotica in the English language that actually works because it is well written and explores the motivations of the characters, rather than just getting into the physicality of the act. When the author finally comes to write about the central characters sex with her lover, it is all the more powerful and arousing for knowing how this fits into her life and mental landscape.
And like any great book, it leaves you asking questions of yourself after you have finished reading. show less

Ever since the runaway success of 50 Shades of Grey, the (re)discovery of erotica has been foremost in the book world. People ask me all the time if I've read that book and what I might have thought of it. And they seem surprised that someone who reads incessantly wouldn't have read it. But when I try to explain that I have in fact read erotica before (and long prior to this new trend), then the consensus is that I would want to read something far more literary as if there is no such thing as literary erotica, no author like Anais Nin. Of course, there is, and there are authors like Nikki Gemmell, whose ten year old novel The Bride Stripped Bare is another example of literary erotica, a sexually charged book with a purposeful concept show more behind its erotic explorations. But perhaps my past experiences should have prepared me for the fact that even literary erotica misses the mark for me.

Opening with a note from the main character's mother offering the enclosed diary or set of lessons as a book to be published anonymously in the wake of the eponymous bride's unexplained disappearance, the note itself sets up the purpose of the narrative: a woman no longer content in the sexless and passionless existence of her marriage who opens herself up to find herself as a sexual being through an affair and anonymous encounters. As such, this purports to be an exploration of the secret interior life of all women, to show what women want from men, to examine their unstated sexual desires, and to serve as an awakening for all wives but also for all husbands. Told in short vignette-like chapters illustrating purported life lessons, the main character remains anonymous and addresses the reader in the second person as she tells her own story. In short, the bride of the title has recently married and on her delayed honeymoon with her new husband, Cole, discovers that he and her best friend Theo have some sort of relationship to which she has never been privy. She's convinced he's having an affair despite his fierce denials and a slow freeze sets into their marriage. But this freeze is simply the culmination of a long standing situation as it turns out that lust, consideration, and communication have been leaking out of their relationship since long before their mostly platonic marriage took place.

And so begins the unnamed bride's quest to discover for herself, outside of her withering marriage, what she wants sexually. She meets and embarks on an affair with the gorgeous, virginal Gabriel, setting herself up as his teacher in all things sensual, and striving to make their connection purely physical, entirely devoid of emotional attachments. As Gabriel learns to pleasure her, she learns just what pleasures her as well, taking this knowledge back to Cole and working to reinvigorate their marriage in the bedroom.

Despite what it may sound like, the book itself is actually not terribly titillating and as a reader, I was most bothered by the fact that without the bedrock principles of trust and honesty, our bride narrator still wants to save her emotionless marriage thinking that sex with strangers will do just that. Although the second person, direct address is meant to personalize the situation for the reader, making her feel as if the tale is revealing the reader's own secret life as well as the bride's, this conceit doesn't quite work unless you posit that all women secretly fantasize about infidelity and rough group sex. Oddly enough, as casual as the bride is about revealing her desires to her diary or in this manuscript and to those men she chooses to pleasure her, she is remarkably prude and silent about exploring her own sexuality with her husband. Both the main male characters, her husband and her lover, are incredibly one dimensional and her conflicts with her mother and former best friend never quite reach the sort of passion they should either, leaving the whole tone strangely flat. Definitely a curious read, in some ways this might be a liberating sort of story for some and Gemmell can certainly write well but there's no actual plot to hang this awakening and affair on and that's a problem when it also doesn't really stand for the revelation of all (most?) women's unspoken desires, as it purports to do. show less

This is an ambitious and affecting novel and I don't know how I missed all the hype about it when it first came out. Normally I find novels written in the 2nd person a bit too much like hard work, but Gemmell really makes her own. Although it was billed as a daring piece of erotica when it was first released, oh how quickly fashions change. I suspect it might disappoint readers of the current trends in 'erotica' who are used to getting a shag-fix every 1500 words. There's a lot more going on here than just sex as Gemmell takes us through the tribulations and triumphs of a young marriage. Personally, I didn't think the framing device was necessary, but that's just my vote. By the time I got to the end, I was thinking I would look for show more something else by this author, and low, there was a sample of her latest book handily presented on my Kindle edition of the Bride...It's called With My Body. I read this, but it felt altogether too samey in tone, style and content. So I'm not saying never, but not for now at any rate.

Update: 10th November 2012.

I was quite surprised to see this in the Daily Mail's list of 30 most titillating books of all time today. Especially so far up the list, as the sexual content struck me as quite limited in terms of actually percentage of words in the novel. A bit like a crime novel where someone rings the heroine up for a quick chat in chapter fiteen and mentions they heard about a murder, and then nine chapters later she reads in the paper that no one bothered to ever investigate it and she wonders for a paragraph or two is this is the same case as whats-her-name mentioned, but then the doorbell rings and she gets on with the rest of her life. show less

The author had the main character think things about men that I've thought many, many times. I had no idea where the book was going to go, and as I got deeper and deeper into it, I found myself nodding and saying "exactly!".

But.....then the madness for a baby got in the way, and just annoyed me. Not everyone wants kids, and I'd love to have seen this story in an alternate universe where her biological clock was NOT ticking. That's all I'm going to say, no spoilers here.

Oh, and if you try to figure out the content of the mini-chapters by the lines above each starting page, don't bother. It makes no sense at all.

Oh, I love this one. Love, love, love. Gets deep into a somewhat disturbed woman's mind. And honestly, I think we're all at least slightly disturbed. It's honest, It's sexual, It's devastating and sad and everything I like to read.

I will say the ending confused me a little.

But it's a page-turner for sure.

The writing style of this book is very different, I'd call it Second Person Singular. I found it off-putting, it reminded me of a Choose Your Own Adventure book, although I personally wouldn't have chosen any of her adventures!
The story seemed contrived and unbelievable - I expected that in the end it would be revealed that her encounters took place only in her imagination.
It's not the best erotica I've read, some of the scenarios are downright boring, others I found repulsive. I guess I just don't share the belief that degradation leads to empowerment.

Angus and Robertson Top 100, Book #78.
This book was not what I was anticipating when I started to read it. I was suprised by the implication that the author was trying to imply that no one is happy in their marriage, and that the only way to remain a "good wife" is to be having a secret affair. I also was not a fan of some of the implications that to also be a good wife she had to submit to any sexual desire of her husband's, regardless of how she felt about it. I can't quite figure out why this book made such huge waves when it was released, but maybe I'm not the target audience, as I am actually happy in my relationship.
Other than that, the writing was easy to read, and the story flowed fairly easily.