Sabrina Benaim

misery loves company (or mine does, anyway)

(Full disclosure: I received a free electronic ARC through NetGalley.)

my grandmother says
heartache is
a hungry caterpillar
that must be fed
so it can grow
wings
& fly away
(“feed a fever, starve a cold”)

the girl gets carried away.
she is the sugar cube,
love is the cup of
darjeeling – she
dissolves,
faster
than
you
think
she
will.
(“magic trick 001”)

I'd never heard of Sabrina Benaim before spotting (and immediately downloading) a copy of her poetry book, show more Depression & Other Magic Tricks, on NetGalley. Later I learned that a live reading of her poem "Explaining My Depression to My Mother" went viral a few years back, with over five million views on YouTube, reportedly making Benaim "one of the most-viewed performance poets of all time." And indeed, it is awesome and lovely and well, well worth the hype:

https://youtu.be/aqu4ezLQEUA

Though "Explaining My Depression to My Mother" is indeed one of the fifty-three poems found in Depression & Other Magic Tricks, you should definitely check out Benaim's reading as well; her performance is brimming with frenetic, nervous energy that lends the poem an added sense of urgency. Anyone who has found themselves trying to explain the invisible, elusory monster that is depression to a non-believer will relate to lines like this:

mom says happy is a decision.

OR

mom says i am so good at making
something out of nothing,
and then flat out asks me if i am
afraid of dying.
no,
i am afraid of living.

After the sudden death of my husband earlier this year, I had to make my family understand just how bad my anxiety and depression had gotten in the years since I left home. Like, it was literally a matter of life and death. Survival. Luckily, everyone around me seems to understand what I mean when I say "depression" - thank pop culture or my younger sister, whose issues maybe paved the way for the revelation of mine - but "social anxiety" is a whole 'nother mess. People hear "social anxiety" and think: Shyness. Introvert. Quiet. Loner. Misanthrope. What they don't hear is "mental illness." Drugs (maybe) and therapy (definitely) and professional help. "Explaining My Depression to My Mother" is heartbreaking and darkly funny and entirely too relatable, in more ways than I'd like.

Despite the collection's title, not all of the poems explicitly focus on depression. Love, grief, parental estrangement, self-esteem, friendship - all make an appearance here, and why not? Life is a multi-faceted thing. Yet many, if not all, of the poems are tinged with an air of sadness, and why not? Depression sinks its poisonous tentacles into everything, it seems. It cannot be cornered or contained. It's like that damned fog in Stephen King's "The Mist."

Aside from the obvious - birds of a feather, and all that jazz - I like Depression & Other Magic Tricks for two reasons: I actually "got" most of the poems, and it's feminist AF. In this way, it rather reminds me of another book of poetry, Amanda Lovelace's The Princess Saves Herself in this One. If you enjoyed one, most likely you'll dig the other.

File Depression & Other Magic Tricks under "seven small ways in which i loved myself this week."

http://www.easyvegan.info/2017/09/28/depression-other-magic-tricks-by-sabrina-be... show less

2018 Spring:

A friend threw me at a recording of Sabrina Benaim reading "Explaining Depression to My Mother" and it was so passionately on key I felt the need to pick this book up right after. I loved this tome, and have recommended it out to three other people since. Her poetry in short, sharp, full of every feeling, and grabs you by the shoulders from the second you start. You feel her longing and her love, as well as her pain and frantic changes.

I will be keeping an eye on this one for show more further publications. show less

This slim volume contains poetry of what appears to an autobiographical, or at least semi-autobiographical nature. Living up to its title, it deals with struggles regarding depression and anxiety, as well as touching upon family, friends, romantic relationships, etc. along the way. That might suggest the book is rather dark to read, but personally it was more comforting -- in that sort of way of knowing there are others like you out there and you can relate with them. The book isn't exactly show more narrative, but it does seem to continue in such a way to suggest a progression. The final poem ends on a note of optimism and is quite lovely. My personal favorite poem, however, is roughly smack-dab in the middle and is entitled "how to fold a memory." show less

I am so glad I read this book which has everything regarding the feelings, the misunderstandings and the wants/needs of someone who is suffering from depression.
The lines analyse how depression actually is the one whom you consider the closest , do not understand what's happening with you in your life, how others discriminate people with mental health issues, how it can affect the one who are suffering from it but they misunderstood and misinterpreted you.

This collection made me think about show more the various social issues when it comes to mental health. Yes, I was looking for a poetry collection which deals with mental health and which would make me think how difficult it is to cope with mental health issues while reading it.

I could simply connect with the writer and I was able to understand what they like to convey. It talks about how we are as a person, how different and alike we are from our parents, what being single feels like , loneliness, being in love and the usual things one loves! show less