Jules Machias

As an "own voices" story of fluid gender identity, this book is unique and wonderful. As a MG novel, it has some hiccups, particularly with pacing. I found it slow to get started with too much wrapped up too quickly at the end, and the characters -- especially Ash -- sometimes had too much going on. When Ash went to the music rehearsal and was all, "music is my life!" my reaction was, "...really? since when?" Not that a character should only have one or two Things, but myriad character show more traits can be hard for middle grade readers to track, especially in a book with two POV characters, so I want every trait to matter and clearly be in service of the larger story. I predict this will be super important for some of my genderqueer kiddos, but less engaging as a "window" for kids who don't share Ash's experience. I could totally be wrong, though! show less

Ash has recently had to switch middle schools after getting bullied for being genderqueer. They're in girl mode but feel nervous about their impending boy mode: will people understand and accept them? Is their dad right about how they should pick a side? Daniel is dealing with his parents' separation and criticism from his family for being an overly emotional boy who cries at everything. He impulsively steals a dog that was supposed to be put down at the vet's office where he volunteers and show more turns to his photography class classmate, Ash, for help taking care of the dog and finding it a home. The 13 year olds like-like each other, but as Ash drifts into boy mode, will Daniel still like them? I felt for and rooted for these kids, and was so happy for them as they learned to embrace the things other people criticized them for. TW for transphobia, bullying (including physical), dysphoria, terrible parents, sick animals, animal death mentions, and sexism/gender roles stuff. Own Voices. show less

(review also posted on Netgalley)

4.5/5 Stars

In my middle grade classroom (I am a teacher), the only nonbinary character representation we had was through George by Alex Gino--which students loved, but also felt a bit young at times (it features a 4th grade protagonist). I was excited to see this book available on Netgalley!

The representation in this book is strong--our main character, Ash (Asher/Ashley -- our 13 year old genderfluid main character) is very honest and direct about his/her show more feelings towards his/her gender, and how they feel their gender presentation and innate feeling alternates, with their not having any real control over it. Ash has a fairly realistic family--Mom is supportive to the extent of advocating for puberty-blocking medication, while struggling with how to verbalize Ash's struggles (there is a passage were Mom talks about "taking time to decide", which felt a bit cringey, but added to the characters feeling honest and flawed).

We also have Daniel, another 13 year old, who is learning how to navigate his feelings, while feeling as though he is too emotional--despite his friends validating him and seeing his truth. This definitely opens up the opportunity to talk about how to navigate emotions, and how some genders are permitted more range and opportunity with how to express themselves. While this sounds more heavy, there is also an elderly dog named Chewbarka that our characters are seeking to take care of. All in all, I would recommend this be in all middle grade classrooms, and potentially 9th grade rooms. The writing was a bit choppy and disjointed for my preference (although it did support character development, so I am rounding up to 5 stars), so I am not sure I would want to teach this text, but I would certainly recommend to students for independent or book club reading. show less

This book, in ways, has a niche audience in regards to middle school. Yes, it's a window into someone's life that most of use don't understand, for you truly have to walk in people's shoes to understand them. This novel provides those shoes. It's also a needed window because there are very few books with gender fluid middle school characters.

Ash presents as a girl--currently. She categorizes her life by boy and girl in many ways--her music and her clothing as she tries to fit in society show more without being treated badly. Having been terribly bullied, Ash's mom moves her to a new school where people are more inclusive. There's even a Rainbow Alliance student group where students are fully accepted. Ash's good friend attends the school and encourages her to join the club so that she can see other students embracing their identities at different stages. Ash struggles revealing her gender fluidity because of the abusive bullying she received that went out on social media. This abusive left her scared to completely show her true self. Ash's mom supports Ash completely, wanting only the best for her while Ash's dad struggles with the concept of gender fluidity. He demands Ash pick one gender. It doesn't matter which, just pick!

Daniel struggles with his own issues of having strong feelings--he cries easily, which boys aren't supposed to do. He's a really nice kid, which seems to get pushed aside in an effort to make him tougher. He has a big heart, which causes the entire issue: he has to protect a dog. He works at a vet's office and ends up hiding a dog that was supposed to be euthanized. The employee who saves the dog and hides him with Daniel leaves suddenly due to a family emergency, forgetting about the dog. Now Daniel is hiding a leaky dog, lying to his mother, and losing sleep while sneaking out of the house to check on the poor dog. He meets Ash who genuinely wants to help, as they both love dogs. Ash and Daniel discover they genuinely like this other person. Both of them are super nice and help without asking for anything in return. Of course, Daniel has no idea that Ashley is sometimes Asher. There's a lot going on in Daniel's life at home, so saving the dog becomes a way to unconsciously fight back against the injustices and the helplessness that life offers.

Eventually, everything has to come out: Ash's past and his personal identity and Daniel's feelings about how his family makes him feel. Someone also needs to take care of the dog. Finally, people have to learn to give space to others and apologize when needed. There are even step-by-step instructions on how to apologize. The message is clearly stated at the end. It's a good and solid message.

My eyes were opened to living gender fluid. I could think of quite a few students we've had at the middle school I work at that are probably gender fluid. It's explains a lot about their clothing choices. I've been so proud of these kids for being themselves. That's hard for even adults and people who aren't gender fluid! I will say it took a long time to get to the end of the novel. it seemed to stay in one place--plot-wise--for a long time. Pacing could be improved, in other words. I also worry about people telling kids who need the book not to read it, and they aren't even related to the kids. Kids need this mirror; they need to feel seen and that they matter. Telling them they don't exist represents bullying. I fear the book used as a window will be stymied. I hope, at least, the kids who need it will be able to read it. show less