Laura Gao

In Messy Roots: A Graphic Memoir of a Whuanese American, Laura Gao tells the story of her experience immigrating to the U.S. as a young child to follow her parents, who preceded her in immigrating for employment opportunities. Having spent her first few years in her grandparents’ care, she didn’t recognize her parents and felt a sense of displacement at moving to Texas. Gao describes her feelings of conflict as she sought to fit in while her parents had their own goals for her as the show more eldest daughter of immigrants. No one in the U.S. knew of Wuhan when she was young, but that changed after college.

Gao’s story is an American story of identity formation in a land of immigrants, though it also reveals the extra structural barriers that face immigrants. She discusses her conflicted feelings of identity as she tried to balance her heritage, her new home, and figure out who she was within both. Gao’s art brilliantly illustrates her story, using expressions and color to bring her memoir to vivid life. A great read that’s all too relevant given the rise of anti-Asian racism since the pandemic. show less

(Full disclosure: I received a free e-ARC for review through Edelweiss. Content warning for homophobia and allusions to rape.)

-- 3.5 stars, rounded up to 4 where necessary --

When a rather spectacular fall sidelines high school sophomore Kirby Tan, she's forced to choose an extracurricular other than rock climbing to pad her college applications. Since her English grades are in the toilet, Kirby's high school counselor convinces her to join the high school newspaper. An already challenging show more placement strains the "Queen of Balance's" patience when she's paired with Beatrix "Bex" Santos. Kirby's mission, should she choose to accept (or even embrace) it? Help this astrology-loving, tarot card-reading, out and proud, queer hippie chick catapult her "Ask the Universe" advice column onto the screens of every kid at Lowell High.

Only Kirby doesn't believe in the stars, or possibly even love. Not since her baba died, way too young. Not since her mom joined a conservative Christian church in order to fill the void. And certainly not since her beloved yeye had a stroke - right after Kirby came out to her family.

I was really worried that I wouldn't enjoy KIRBY'S LESSONS FOR FALLING (IN LOVE). Bex's intro is over-the-top dramatic and I didn't really care for her initially. But she grew on me rather quickly, much as she did with Kirby. Kirby and Bex make a cute pair, and watching their friendship evolve - and then deepen - was pretty lovely. Best friends Eric and Astrid round out the friend group, and both characters are well developed. I especially loved (in a bittersweet way) the backstory of how Astrid and Bex met (in detention, natch). show less

Laura Gao moved from Wuhan to Texas as a child and experienced drastic displacement and alienation as a minority in her small town. She soon gets a baby brother, and eventually they figure out how to team up, but the larger theme of the story is Laura figuring out her identity as a Chinese-American lesbian. Young Laura desperately wants to fit in, but doesn't feel acceptance in her majority-white school. The occasional trip back to China provides the opportunity to renew her bond with her show more cousins and practice the language. College at Penn provides a tremendous learning experience, in and out of the classroom, and living in San Francisco after college is a revelation. But when the COVID-19 pandemic sweeps the globe, Laura sees and feels the impact of anti-Asian hate.

The style is visually lively, with lots of artistic and video game references ("unlocked," "level up"). English is in black text, Chinese (translated into English or not) in blue.

See also: Kelly Yang, Thanhhai Lai, Ellen Oh, Lisa Yee

Quotes

I barely knew how to pronounce "Texas," let alone call it my home. Wuhan was more foreign than Mars here. I wished we'd never moved so that I wouldn't have to explain myself. (18)

DISS: Deception for Immigrant Sibling Solidarity (22)

Wuhanese 101 (p. 101)

"Do you miss it?"
"Yeah...I do. But things change. That's just how it is." (Laura and her dad, 109)

Finally, I could explore whatever I wanted without my friends, family, or faith in the way. Moving across the country [to Penn] gave me the perfect blank canvas. (167)

After being spoiled by how accepting San Francisco had been, I'd forgotten how easily people could turn when they're afraid. (232)

..I was scared to think that the place we all called home could change in a heartbeat. (265) show less

Loved this -- doesn't pull punches, tells a great story, really lets the reader in. Laura Yuyang Gao talks about growing up as an immigrant, with immigrant parents. About the different flavors of racism that affect Asian Americans, including the internalized. About being queer. She captures so many painful and realistic parts of growing up -- from the mistakes to the annoying to the nostalgic, to the choices teens make when they are trying to figure out who they are. The art is fabulous, and show more the timeliness of talking about anti-Asian hate as spawned by the Covid-19 epidemic hits especially hard. show less