Stuart Maher

Athynae na Ridire and Athlain Treyson are the oldest children of two heroes responsible for defeating the Darkening and the first children born on the island of Inis Bolcan after the end of that event. Athynae is asked by her mother to try to help sort out some problems with a group from the mainland who are trying to get permission to get into a part of the island held by some native tribes to claim an inheritance. With the help of Athlain and her brother Rahvin, she manages to not only see show more the documents that supposedly prove this inheritance—which the mainlanders were unwilling to show to her mother—but also finds that they are definitely forgeries. With this information, the actual plan (an illegal hunt) is soon uncovered and the conspirators on the island dealt with. While in other books, this would likely lead directly to a larger adventure involving at least those on the mainland behind the hunt plan, in this case the matter seems to be considered over by Athynae, Athlain, and Rahvin, and the story quickly covers the next couple of years before some mercenaries are hired to injure or kill the three during a combat tournament. They manage to learn of and thwart the plan with some assistance, but are shut out of the investigation due to the political complications that they lack the skill to handle.

I wanted to rate this higher as I read it, but it ends pretty much just as the main story of the series seems to be starting. I liked the interactions between the characters (although Athynae’s behavior can border a bit too close to bullying at times), that none of the characters are portrayed as flawless, and none of the antagonists seem to be evil just because they’re evil (aside from possibly the person behind the Darkening, but they’re more a background detail than an actual character). I’ll probably be here for the next book, since I do want to know where this is going and the authors were able to keep me interested during what was essentially just set-up for the story. show less

I think this book could've benefitted from a little more editing. I greatly enjoyed the plot, characters, and worldbuilding, but I was left with questions not normally left at the end of the first book: what was the significance of the assassin and letting him go free with the poacher scandal? How old were the characters by the end of the book? Why were Athlain's parents so worried about him becoming a Warrior? There were also some typos and inconsistencies that threw me for a loop and show more knocked me out of the story for a few moments.

As I said, the worldbuilding was fascinating and the plot was engaging. I would like to follow this series as it comes out, though I hope the future books are slightly more refined.

Thank you to LibraryThing and the authors for the gifted copy! show less

I really enjoyed this book. The characters were really fun and I enjoyed the world building. There were a couple of sections that felt like they were a little long, but I think they did help explain parts of the story that were important. I had a lot of fun reading this and can't wait to see the next books in the series

I'll start with my first impression while reading this book: it needs an editor. I will say that it seems to get better farther into the book, or at least I stopped noticing the things that needed editing if they persisted throughout.

The story is not good, it's not bad, but it has extremely low stakes for most of the story, and spends far too much time telling the read, often repeatedly, what is at risk, rather than moving the plot forward. There are moments where the story hints and bigger show more and better things, some of them are in the past, some of them are probably planned for future books, but none of them occur in this story. The rather low stakes are made even lower by the fact that one of the main characters (the female) is treated as essentially flawless. The only trials she ever faces are the main plot elements, but every plan goes off flawlessly, ever battle she wins with little or no struggle. There is very little as a reader to worry about, and with her as the lead, there is nothing to motivate you to turn the page. The male lead is slightly more interesting (because the male always has to be the one with a bunch of weaknesses nowadays), but even he doesn't have a complete story arc, and when you get to the end of the book you see why; it's planned for future books. The female is not an interesting character, nearly flawless, has an attitude problem when she doesn't understand the very reasonable requests of her superiors, and is general flat and unlikable. The male is more interesting because he has an obvious character development laid out for him, but it doesn't happen in this book. If I were to read the future stories (of which there are three more planned) I would only be in it for the male lead.

The telling of the story becomes even more difficult to follow or get into because of the amount of made up words, places, and historical events that are referred to constantly but never incorporated into the story organically. As a result, you either have to endure sections of pure info-dump, or you are left feeling slightly outside of the story you are reading. It was like walking up to someone else's conversation and understanding 3/4 of it. I understand enough to not be lost, but I always feel like an outsider, and therefore not really invested in the story.

The writing has an inconsistent quality to it that at times is hard to fully articulate. Occasionally you have large enough words being used that it makes me think that it is written for an older audience, but then the relationships, the dialogue, and the story-telling maintain a much lower quality that seems more appropriate for a pre-teen reader. On the topic of writing, the world never feels fleshed out. There is not a lot of world-building (yes there is a lot of history, but the actual world is very poorly described), and even though there are some descriptions of the characters, I never developed a clear sense of the world I was supposed to be in. My initial mental picture was far more simple than certain descriptions that would pop up, leaving me with a confused, poorly defined semi-advanced/semi-crude world and a bunch of characters that were essentially blank husks that I only recognized by name. Also, it isn't ever defined anywhere, and it takes a while before you start to realize that they only way you know whose perspective you are reading is by the symbol at the beginning of the section. You'll figure it out eventually, but you may struggle longer than necessary to become invested in what little story there is in the beginning because of this confusion.

Also, mid chapter on two different occasions the story just skips forward a year, basically revealing how little even the writers think of the story they had been writing up to those points. The investigation that makes up the beginning of the book is just shelved and time skips forward. If there had been less dialogue that was more concise in its delivery, this book probably could have been the first third to maybe first half of a better paced and more interesting book.

I won't give this book a one star because I have definitely read worse, but if three is average and the minimum I expect from a completed work, this is definitely below that. I will at least say that, if the male character ends up pursuing the pirate treasure in the next book, and the female gets involved in all the potential murder and conspiracy that was hinted at, the second book in the series could be far more compelling of a read, but there would definitely need to be growth from the authors as writers if they want to live up to the story's budding potential. show less