John Kralik

I was perusing the Audible app looking for my next audiobook. I noticed this book as the Audible Daily Deal and decided it sounded good enough to give it a shot. In December 2007, Kralik was at the lowest point in his life. He was going through his second divorce. He had a limited relationship with his two adult children and was afraid of losing more time with his young daughter. His girlfriend had also just broken up with him. His law practice was failing and he wasn't sure he was going to show more be able to meet payroll let alone pay his own bills. He was afraid his ultimate dream of becoming a judge was something he would never achieve.

After receiving a lovely thank you from his ex-girlfriend for a Christmas gift, Kralik wondered if happiness could be achieved by being grateful. He began to imagine himself writing thank you notes as a way to remember to be grateful for the people in his life and the kindnesses he had received. He devised an idea to write 365 thank-you notes. As he began to write notes for gifts received or simple acts of kindness from a barista, or from a fellow lawyer, or to his own family, he noticed a difference in his attitude and the attitude of the people that received his thank you note.

Kralik began to notice some unexpected results in areas including finances, friendships, family relationships, and his health. But, also, during this time the economy collapsed and banks failed. Even though not everything was going well for him, he believed he reacted differently because of his thank you project. His message that resounds throughout the whole book is that handwriting a thank you note is special and forces the writer to concentrate more on the task rather than sending an email. It doesn't take much more time to handwrite a note than it does to write an email. The card doesn't have to be fancy or large. A simple note card is perfect for getting a brief message of thanks and gratitude across to someone. Receiving a handwritten card in the mail has a much different effect on the person than opening an email does.

This book is a little dreary for the first several chapters. Kralik has a lot of negative events happening in his life and the reader is given a lot of detail related to the demise of his marriages and business dealings. It made the book a bit difficult to get into. I listened to this book on audio with Kralik as the narrator which made it personal, but he does have a rather monotone voice and during the early chapters, I found the voice and theme of the book extremely dreary and less interesting. As he began the thank you project, the pace picked up.

Really, this book shouldn't be such a shock to most of us. We know that it feels good to be appreciated and told that our efforts made a difference. Yet, it seems to be hard to express that to the people who offer us a kindness. The message of this book offers a reminder that sharing our appreciation for others and their relationship with us is worth us taking the time to write a note of thanks. As Kralik comes to the end of his project, after just fifteen months he is a completely new person and has many positive things to show for it. show less

This book is non-fiction that reads like a novel. I found everything about the book likable: the author himself, his simple but profound views of life, his writing (he's a GOOD writer and I've read some bad writing!). He's intelligent, wise, and sometimes very funny.

He is never preachy or boring, and I'm left thinking, "Yes. This could work." I've written thank-you notes all my life, but for Christmas presents, not at this level. Now I feel challenged to give it a try.

One of the aspects about this book that I really appreciated was that gratitude came difficultly to the author. He wasn't predisposed to recognizing the positives in his life but rather someone preoccupied by self pity before the fateful year began.

For those of us that push the self pity button too quickly, this book was a wonderful reminder of the people in our lives that bring us daily gifts of themselves.

For my part, I used to send 5 thank yous a week to people that performed those show more "daily miracles" that often get overlooked, especially in a world where 140 character communicaitons are the norm rather than the exception. I got out the of the habit, and found myself steadily focusing less on the positive than on the negative.

So I identified with the author's struggle, and the power that this simple exercise, sending a thank you note a day, could have on his own condition.

But there's more to it than that. Certainly the book begins by demonstrating the positive impact a few moments of selflessness can have on the self. But the author matures over the course of that year to recognize his responsibility to be a part of any positive force in the world around him, rather than simply consuming good events or good news.

For that critical reminder, I am grateful for having read it. I read the other reviews on this page, and have to say I don't disagree with any of the assertions. But it bothers me less that the author wasn't magically transformed by the exercise. He was still human, and by dint of this, as flawed as the rest of us. But he had become a positive force in his environment, and that lifts the condition of the entire world.

After all, the only thing that negativity breeds is more negativity. show less

My mother would have loved “365 Thank Yous,” by John Kralik A stringent disciple and proponent of Emily Post’s etiquette, my mother was demanding about thank-you notes. As a child, when I was only on the sending end of such missives, I viewed them as a chore. However, as I grew older and enjoyed the pleasure of receiving thank-you notes, I began to understand their value.

In his testimonial for the writing of thank-you notes, Kralik travels a somewhat similar journey, from one who show more rarely puts his gratitude in writing, to one who learns the importance and meaning such expressions can denote and elicit. Kralik insists that he conducted his thank-you note project as an “exercise in average good manners,” though his inspiration came during a mountain trail walk when he heard a voice say, “Until you learn to be grateful for the things you have, you will not receive the things you want.” His narrative vacillates between these two philosophies, as he, on the one hand, feels frustrated when his life does not seem to improve, or things do not go his way. On the other hand, he expresses appreciation for the good things, feelings, and relationships that result from his efforts. So to me, his perspective on gratitude and expectations is, to a certain extent, left unresolved.

For those who enjoyed “The Happiness Project”, by Gretchen Rubin, and “Unfinished Business,” by Lee Kravitz, this could be a quick and enjoyable read. Although for me, “365 Thank Yous” does not have the introspection or perception of the other two efforts. show less