Francesco Marciuliano

Sometimes I need a smile. A rough day. Unexpected money leaks for broken appliances, car repairs, doctor or vet bills. Teenage angst living in my house. Everyone knows the sort of days I mean....we all have them. That's the time when I drag myself home and just need a dose of cute. An infusion of happy to offset the Really Horrible Day. That's why I buy books like this one! Poems written by pets (well, poems dictated by pets...ha ha). These books are little.....4x6.....but they pack a huge show more cuteness wallop! And....they never fail to make me smile, even on the day our refrigerator died....in the middle of a pandemic.

This particular volume of poems -- I Knead My Mummy -- is penned by kittens. I laughed and smiled as I read about 3 am leg climbing, toy killing and general destruction. Before I returned to work full time, I fostered orphan kittens for the local humane society. Very rewarding....but time consuming and difficult at times. This book reminded me of all the tiny fur faces that stayed with me for awhile before continuing on to their forever homes. :) And had me noticing, the frayed arm of the couch in my office, the tiny holes in my curtains, the 2/3 dead carpet tree..... Kittens are cute, lovely, adorable.....and destructive little fur demons. :) But I love them.

And I love poetry penned in their names, too!

My favorites:

Black Kitten

I purr
I nuzzle
I lick
I cuddle
I run
I leap
I play
I sleep
But if you think that is an evil omen
If you think all that is pure bad luck
Then yes, you will endure great misfortune
Because without me your life will suck


Looking Good

Lick
Lick
Slobber
Lick
Lick
There
Now all your left arm hairs
Point in the same direction
And Glisten
And smell of seafood surprise
And you're welcome.

Each poem is accompanied by a full color photo of a cat or kitten being very feline. And the front cover is quite colorful and cute -- three kittens getting into mischief. This book is tiny and only 109 pages....but it's incredi-cute, funny and fun. I highly recommend it -- and the other little tomes in this series featuring cats and dogs. They have such awesome titles as: I Could Pee on This (Cats) and I Could Chew on This (dogs) and some are even self-help books - You Need More Sleep: Advice from Cats.

These books are also attractive. Full color, hardback with dust jackets. They would make attractive gifts for animal lovers, or for display on a bookshelf or coffee table. show less

Anyone with a dog in their life knows that dogs view the world differently than we humans do. The poems in this collection explore everything from doorbells to separation anxiety from a dog’s perspective. I think my favorite is “Another Bag”, in which the dog poet reflects on the love his human has for picking up and saving his waste in a bag.

The poems are accompanied by adorable illustrations of dogs of various breeds and sizes. However, it’s disappointing that there isn’t a Shih show more Tzu in the bunch. Any dog lover would welcome this book as a gift, and it’s just the right size for a stocking stuffer. show less

Cat lovers and cat haters agree on little, but they would agree on this collection of poems, ostensibly written by cats themselves. Cat lovers would fondly recognize the eccentricities and foibles of their beloved companions; cat haters will be reminded of all of the feline traits they most despise.

My cat Miyabi was rescued after living as a near-feral cat outside a Paducah, Kentucky, hotel for at least a year. He’s still a bit traumatized, and the poem “Unbridled Love” could have been show more written by him:

I knead your chest with my sharp claws
To show you my affection
I bite your arm and don’t let go
To show you adoration

Yep, that’s Miyabi in a nutshell. And psycho or not, I still love him. Only a little bit more than I love Franceco Marciuliano’s hilarious book of poems. show less

Why are you reading this review? You should not waste another moment on this or any other thing, but pick up a copy of I Could Pee on This and start reading it aloud to anyone and everyone, including those creatures with “wittle” furry faces. This book of poems illustrates with charming insights and humor the essence that is “Cat.” You will learn that you are not the only one whose cat deposited a dead mouse on your bed. (The one my cat brought me was most alive and uninjured, so show more consider yourself lucky that you didn’t have to chase down the dead one, just dispose of it.) You will learn how cats express love – often in painful ways – to their humans. You’ll discover the cuteness that only cats can convey with their antics. Whether they are chasing themselves in a mirror, claiming their territory, bathing while sitting on you, or walking across the room without touching the floor, cats are in charge. Get used to it. This gem of a book will help you understand a cat’s life from a cat’s viewpoint, and really, what more do you need to know? The delightful photos are just icing on the cake or maybe catnip on the kibble. This is a book you will want to own and read over and over. But don’t let your cat pee on it. show less