C. B. Smith

The premise is interesting. Jaynie is almost seventeen years old. She has red hair, a temper, and big toes so large that she can't find shoes at Bigguns Shoe Emporium to fit. She discovers a mysterious magical trunk with a picture of a woman who can only be her mother. Jaynie begins asking her father questions only to learn that her mother is a Faërie Queen who disappeared thirteen years ago and may still be alive. The novel chronicles Jaynie's dual journies to find her mother and to grow up.

None of the characters came alive for me which may have been due to some poorly timed descriptions. As one example, Leo - a lover of Jaynie's, is introduced to the reader and it's twelve pages later that we find out his features are koala-esque. Does this mean he simply looked like a koala or was Jayne's normal world inhabited by animal/human hybrids? Leo is nocturnal and likes to sleep in Eucalyptus trees which implies the latter.

The plot skips around a little bit and some details get mixed up. For example, Jaynie's existence for several years is as a nomadic traveler who ends up in Dumas, New York. In another section she's only known her aunt, her father and the town of Dumas.

There are some imaginative touches such as the faërie world being underneath the world we live in. In order to get to the faërie world Jaynie is shrunk to acorn size to fit through the entry point. Dragonflies are called Zipwhizzers and used for transportation. A magical weapon called the Fjärdmir saber makes an appearance that Jayne affectionately names Big Effer (for good reasons).

The first chapter is available on Amazon but be forewarned it has little to do with the rest of the novel.… (more)

“Artistic" Justice
by Janie Pendleton
"Still Life With Psychotic Squirrel", by C.B. Smith
contains:**no spoilers**

First, let me just say that this author, CB Smith, delivers up a delightful taste of real-life "Artistic" justice in the book "Still Life with Psychotic Squirrel". I gave my first star for his originality, cleverness, and loose-comic reality checks. The second star, I gave for his capability of bringing back my own childhood memories, and the third star I gave for the chapter "Auntie Terrorist"...hilariously real for me, as were so many of the other childhood events he offered up in this charming yet giddy book of life. The forth star that I gave this novel, is for its historical accuracy and attention to detail where the actual scene set up was concerned. The fifth star, I gave this novel for blending together the reality checks with real-life situations that I am sure we have all 'suffered' through from time to time in our own past family experiences. Although a different and a bit 'Squirrelly' in style, our Author's rendition of a "Still Life" portrait, sets you up for a fun fall--yet again, that is its title! A fun weekend read!

Ex; To Uncle Henry who just 'chose' to eat another Aunt's cookies at Sunday dinner:

Henry's wife: "Henry? Why don't you like my cookies? The ones I slaved over for the last three days?

Henry: "Uhmmm, well, he stuttered, it's not that dear, it's just that these ones looked so good...

Wife of Henry: "Oh!" she snapped, "I see, THAT one looked good, but MINE didn't?

...lol...I've heard that one before! Haven't you? Hint to hubbies, always put something on your plate from wifey first at family gatherings!

***One sentence review for book jacket:

"Fast-paced, filled to rim with reality and fun, which makes for an insightful read."
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Sprinkled with exotic teenage fun!

Meet Jaynie the teenage faerie Princess in this one-of-a-kind Novel by C.B. SMITH. Jaynie, who is told from a young age by her father, that her mother is dead, is raised by him to teenage years. She is raised in the haunts of a non-typical world, that rises from a not-so-typical teenage girl. But, as years pass, of course they do, she happens upon a cellar with Leo, her new-found Koala-boy friend. They soon discover a letter. It more than leads them to Jaynie's new destiny. Finding that her mother is a faerie, is not the hard part, finding out that she is a queen, and that makes Janyie a princess, is.

This book takes you on two adventures; one is the teenage princess journey, but the underlying adventure, is the one we all share in common as young lasses. The journey to adulthood through the all dreaded adolesence. I would compare this book to the famous 'Alice in Wonderland' sprinkled with a cosmic and unorthodoxed twist!

Author C.B. Smith offers up a tangible tale of young teen aggression mixed with youthful indulgence. Memories will come flooding back from your own childhood, as the zipwhizzer thoughts of this author come into play.

Have you ever read a tale for older teens that sent the words of a dictionary flying into orbit? Have you ever read a book that looked like the author's brain exploded with comical dissaray of wisdom for the younger generation to find some sort of commonplace? This story of young teens rought with today's language, though sometimes rough on any literature scales, is real to life as it gets. It is sprinkled with fantasyland experiences and you've got C.B.'s unusual style, I like to call 'BOOM FACTOR'.

One sentence promo:
C.B.Smith brings an unusual tale to light that is sprinkled with fun and exotic teen faerie experiences that will leave you hopping along the pages for more.
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A fun zipwhizzer tour of Faerie land
By Jym Cherry "Writing Under The Influence of Rock 'n' Roll"

Ordinarily I'm not the person to write a review of a young adults fantasy novel. I didn't read YA novels when I was a kid, and fantasy novels that create new lands and languages usually need (and have) a glossary. But for The Diary of a Teenage Faerie Princess by C.B. Smith, I found myself so rapt into the world that it disarmed me from my usual predilections and I'm glad to have found the book.

The Diary of a Teenage Faerie Princess is a modern fable about Jaynie, a 16 year old girl who's being raised by her father, because 13 years prior Jaynie's mother disappeared. Along with the normal problems of your average 16 year old, Jaynie has a monkey problem. When she goes to investigate she discovers a trunk that demands her attention. In it she finds pictures of her mother and a character named Mad Looney who informs Jaynie that her missing mother is Queen of the Faeries and that she is being held captive by the evil and aptly named Malegar, who is about to invade the faerie kingdom, and that Jaynie, being a Faerie Princess is the only one who can save her mother and avert the coming war. Looney shrinks Jaynie down to faerie size and off to Sormlandia they go.

In The Diary of a Teenage Faerie Princess C.B. Smith displays a playfulness with words and an absurdist sense of humor that should appeal to the teen audience it's intended for, while exposing them to some literary and philosophical points they wouldn't ordinarily run into in other teen fiction. An intriguing and fun zipwhizzer tour of Faerie land.… (more)