A Quote Game: thread #17

Welcome to the New Thread for the Pratchett Quote Game!

A fairly easy one to start us off, with the speaker’s name omitted:

‘Oh, you can cut the crusts off,’ said ____. ‘Even the toenails. If you’re feeling posh.’

I was thinking of rat sandwiches until I remembered Nobby's brush with nobility - so I'll go for Feet of Clay.

That's the one. Your turn sir!

Hi everyone. I am posting here to bring this thread onto my home page since, for some reason this new thread has not appeared there.

4> I'm posting for the same reason.

'It's probably a walrus,' said the doctor, as he was gently but firmly propelled out of the room. 'He's caught a walrus, there's a lot of it going-'

Pyramids?

I can't even begin to picture this one but it sounds like one of the 'younger' books so Johnny and the Dead?

One of my favourite passages! This is about Teppic recovering from 'A case of mortis portalis tackulatum* with complications' in Pyramids!

*Dead as a doornail

I'm posting because #4, #5.

Yes, AnnieMod has it.

Wait! I swear #7 wasn't there when I posted #9! How did you do that, Annie? |-)

#12 LOL Jim, #7 was there when I made my very inaccurate guess.

I must read all the books again; either I am forgetting them or the quotes are getting more obscure.

It's a kind of magic, Jim, it's a kind of magic :)

OK. Now THIS should be easy...

"Stories, great flapping ribbons of shaped space-time, have been blowing and uncoiling around the universe since the beginning of time. And they have evolved. The weakest have died and the strongest have survived and they have grown fat on the retelling... stories, twisting and blowing through the darkness."

I'll pick that low-hanging fruit. The beginning of Sir Pterry's development of Narrative Causality in Witches Abroad?

Yep. All yours.

We're just flying along now!

When Vimes stepped out into the brilliant daylight the first thing he did was draw a deep breath. The second thing he did was draw his sword, wincing as his sore hand protested.

Thud I suspect.

Indeed it is. Take it away!

At least it was what most people think of as the smell of the sea, which is the stink of antique fish and rotten seaweed.

That could be a lot of situations. Where the land meets the see is an edge situation. Where you find 'edges', you'll find 'witches'.

Having said that, let me say this*: Jingo?

*Robert James Lee Hawke

But here at least the sea is a metaphor for nothing more than the sea, no witches are involved and it was not from Jingo.

So, as the piece of string said to the bar man* "No, I'm afraid not."

* Sorry, dreadful punchline to a poor joke.

Hmm I wonder which one this is. I shall try The Last Continent in an attempt to rule out the obvious.

Moving Pictures?

Small Gods?

Your go pinkozcat.

Really? It was a wild guess ...

When it comes to dirty work he probably wrote the book or, more probably, stole it from someone else.

This is Nobby right? (At least it sounds like him). I shall try Men At Arms.

This must be Nobby. Feet of Clay?

No and no.

Is it not Nobby?

No

May be it is Reacher Gilt in Going Postal?

Sorry but no again

Its not Nobby?!

Huh.

Is it that thief guy (Zlorf?) in The Colour of Magic?

No.

No, it's not Nobby- this is from one of the Rincewind books. Sourcery? The stereotypical Grand Vizier - cannot remember his name - that he met while searching for the hat with Conina...

Over to you, AnnieMod ...

"And yet…he smiled all the time, in a cheerful chirpy sort of way, and he acted like the kind of rascal who made a dodgy living selling gold watches that go green after a week. And he appeared to be convinced, utterly convinced, that he never did anything really wrong. He'd stand there amid the carnage, blood on his hands and stolen jewellery in his pocket, and with an expression of injured innocence declare, “Me? What did I do?”"

That would be our introduction to Carcer, from Night Watch?

Yep. All yours

Probably too easy:

... but you can't treat religion as a sort of buffet, can you? I mean, you can't say yes please, I'll have some of the Celestial Paradise and a helping of the Divine Plan but go easy on the kneeling and none of the Prohibition of Images, they give me wind.

Moist in Going Postal?

I know it's the obvious choice but it really does sound like Small Gods.

I think that it sounds more like something from Carpe Jugulum.

ArmyAngel has it - it was indeed Moist from Going Postal.

"Interestingly enough, the gods of the Disc have never bothered much about judging the souls of the dead, and so people only go to hell if that's where they think they deserve to go. Which they won't do if they don't know about it. This explains why it is important to shoot missionaries on sight."

The Truth?

The Last Hero?

Eric?

Annie got it. :)

No clue where it is - it was a wild guess really. Oh well - next:

She was not, herself, hugely in favour of motherhood in general. Obviously it was necessary, but it wasn't exactly difficult. Even cats managed it. But women acted as if they'd been given a medal that entitled them to boss people around. It was as if, just because they'd got the label which said 'mother', everyone else got a tiny part of the label that said 'child'...

Agnes, in response to Magrat being damp, rather than wet? Carpe Jugulum?

:) Yep

Ok, another easy one:

"Tuppence A Bucket, Well Stamped Down!" said
___ encouragingly.

Bragging-rights bonus for knowing who this is being said to.

Well, I think it's Vimes, probably to dwarves and I'm guessing Thud.

I think this is Rincewind in Interesting Times. I don't remember to whom exactly he was talking to.

Pwaites has it!

"Speed it up, and the sound a tree makes is vrooom"

not sure why, but I'm thinking equal rites

Or is it off-world? Good Omens?

Sounds like Rincewind to me. The Last Continent?

Thief of Time?

62> Yes, it's Good Omens. Over to you.

Sorry about the delay.

"So," he said in a low whisper, "have you boys had your holidays yet?"

Guards! Guards!?

Monstrous Regiment?

Vimes being his nonchalant self at the start of Thud?

No, nup and no.
But one of you is close.
;-)

Ooh finally I get to guess. I've been checking this thread each time someone has guessed correctly.

I am thinking Night Watch.

Hooray! Yes indeedy, it was Night Watch. Your turn!

Hey Guys, sorry for the delay! Let us try this one:

People always calmed down when she smiled at them.

Bonus points as always if you can name the person thinking this and who it is referring to.

(sorry for bad grammar; am rather rushed!)

It sounds like Tiffany, so I'll guess Wintersmith.

I will get a little on a tangent here but I am pretty sure that was something very similar in Feet of Clay...

Cheri Littlebottom about Angua when the dwarfs saw her. Her clothes. Her earrings. Her ankles :) The whole passage there is hilarious :)

Yep, Feet of Clay and Cheri and Angua it is. Over to you Annie.

"The pipe was less than three feet away. Fine. This would work. Move both hands on to the new hold, swing gently, get his left hand around the pipe, and he could drag himself across the gap. Then it would be just—"

Pyramids?

Nope

Feet of Clay? I'm thinking of Fred running from the gollum king.

Nope..

Back to back quotes from the same book would be sneaky: AnnieMod, are you really that sneaky? I'm going for Moist's attempts to break into his own Post Office in Making Money.

Well... one of those days I may be that sneaky. Not this time though. And you got it right - Making Money it is.

Your mum made cough sweets, din't she, and fell in the mixture and died. I never have a cough sweet but I think of your mum.

This is Nobby talking... Guards! Guards!?

You've got it!

"The mouth moves, the tongue waggles, but no sense comes out," said --------.

Is a hint needed?

Sounds familiar... but I cannot place it at all so wild guess here Wyrd Sisters just because it sounds a little witchy.

Not Wyrd Sisters.

I'll try The Fifth Elephant

Not The Fifth Elephant.

Full quote: "'The mouth moves, the tongue waggles, but no sense comes out', said the Duke."

Truckers?. One of the Bromeliads I believe anyway :)

Do we play these ones as well? That makes me think what I can post next. :)

Over to AnnieMod! Yes, any book by Terry Pratchett is up for game, not just Discworld.

OKey... had not realized that before :)
That should be easy

'But we all believed him, didn't we? I know I did. Seems like the best possible explanation for all the socks I've lost over the years. I mean, if they'd just fallen down the back of the drawer or something there'd be a mountain of the things by now.'

Aha! The Eater of Socks is made up from leftover belief and whole cloth in Hogfather?

Yes

(and oops - I thought I said yes earlier) :)

I was wondering where you'd got to!

'What a shame,' said the Queen. 'You've let everybody down, haven't you...?'

Sounds like Lords and Ladies but that is only a guess.

It does, doesn't it? It's not that Queen though.

Hmmm - different queen or different book? Is there a queen in Snuff?

The Wee Free Men?

Not in Snuff, but it is from The Wee Free Men. Over to you AA!

(I wonder if there is anything definitive about the Queen in WFM not being the Queen of the Elves in LaL?)

I have always assumed that there was only one queen of the elves. That is why I asked.

WFM would have been my next guess but Angel beat me to it.

"The Watch were always careful not to intervene too soon in any brawl where the odds were not heavily stacked in their favour. The job carried a pension, and attracted a cautious, thoughtful kind of man."

Guards! Guards!?

Nope.

The Color of Magic?

Night Watch?

Pwaites has it!

"He had accepted a chain-mail jacket from ------, but no power in the world would have parted him from his brown bowler hat."

Hmm, could it be the arming of AE Pessimal (spelling?) in Thud?

Over to you joannasephine.

Someone who hasn't had a go recently can take my turn.

I'll pick it up to get things going again; an easy one

"The words rang out across the courtyard. 'Acting-Constable Detritus! Atten-shun!'

Men at Arms? when Carrot defuse the little troll against dwarf fight.

Absolutely correct Over to you Ardagor

"And then there was the traffic. Carts that had been held up outside the city were trying to make their way to their destination before eggs hatched or milk got so rotten it could get out and walk the rest of the way. If Ankh-Morpork had a grid it would have been gridlock."

Feet of Clay?

No to Feet of Clay

Night Watch?

Yes, you got it.

GENERALLY, I MEET PEOPLE BEFORE THEY'VE BEEN BURIED. THE ONES I MEET AFTER THEY'VE BEEN BURIED TEND TO BE A BIT OVEREXCITED AND DISINCLINED TO DISCUSS THINGS.

Reaper Man?

No, not Reaper Man

Or even earlier --Mort perhaps?

No, not Mort

After they've been buried, hmm... What about Pyramids?

Not Pyramids either. Sorry ...

Aha! This would be Death's conversation with my favourite one-book character, the late (but putting up a hell of a fight in the afterlife, what with the Gonne as his burial weapon and all), Acting-Constable Cuddy in Men at Arms?

That's Cuddy dying in Men at Arms

Yeah - Jim posted while I was getting distracted and not clicking on Post :) So ignore me.

I think Minnie is probably asleep, as all good† Aussies should be at this time. I'm holding‡ MAA open at the right page, and Annie agrees with me, so I'll take it as read and offer…

'In this city, gentlemen,' said Mr Slant, 'the facts are never what they seem.'

†No, obviously not me.

‡I put it down so I could type.

The Truth?

*sigh* Everyone sneaked in while I was asleep. Yes, of course it was Cuddy's conversation with DEATH. One of my favourites.

I see that you have gone on without me which is good because I will be out for most of today. Cheers and have a good one whatever your time zone ...

Hello everyone! How goes the game?

I am guessing this one to be Making Money??

It is indeed from The Truth, which as we all know, will make ye fret.

Pwaites, over to you.

"Most people in Lancre, as the saying goes, went to bed with the chickens and got up with the cows. footnote: Er. That is to say, they went to bed at the same time as the chickens went to bed, and got up at the same time as the cows got up. Loosely worded sayings can really cause misunderstandings."

Carpe Jugulum? A wild guess but it was the first book which came to mind.

Wyrd Sisters?

I looked it up and we are both wrong so someone try again. I know the answer so i am out of the competition.

The Fifth Elephant?

None of those. If everyone else guesses, you can go again, pinkozcat.

Whoever guesses correctly gets the baton; I'm out of this round.

Maskerade?

AnnieMod has it. :)

"The person on the other side was a young woman. Very obviously a young woman. There was no possible way that she could have been mistaken for a young man in any language, especially Braille."

Maskarade I believe.

Yep. All yours.

That's possibly my favourite bit in all the books, anyway - on with the next one...

"That's fifty green fires and hot leads to go, with a side order for blisters and scorpions. Hold the mercy."

It's one of the barbarian heroines to Rincewind, but I'm not sure which one. Conina? So Sourcery?

You've got it in one!

Oki doki. I've removed the name and descriptor from this one:

Picturesque. That was a new word to ____. It was one of a number he had picked up since leaving the charred ruins of Ankh Morpork.

Feet of Clay? Huge guess but ...

That is definitely Rincewind thinking about all the crazy new concepts taught him by Twoflower in The Colour of Magic. :)

Anatwork has it!

I don't know why, but I'll guess Nation.

Interesting Times? This is about the Century of the Fruitbat?

No and no.

The Truth. Or is that too obvious?

Yep it is The Truth. Over to you Annie.

And Annie disappeared for the weekend... Here is the next one:

"Clearly war had to exist. It was a cornerstone of the processes of government. It was the way the Empire got its leaders. The competitive examination system was how it got its bureaucrats and public officials, and warfare was for its leaders, perhaps, only a different kind of competitive examination. Admittedly, if you lost you probably weren't allowed to re-sit next year."

Jingo?

Nope.

Interesting Times?

yep. All yours

"It might look like that to the uninitiated, but, as you say, the true sausagidity goes straight to Offler."

Making Money?

No

The Colour of Magic perhaps

Not that either

Going Postal?

Yup. Over to you, Angel.

I think that ArmyAngel1986 must be otherwise occupied.

Would someone else please pick up the baton and get this game going again ... :)

Well then, how about...

THE LAWYERS OF FATE DEMAND A LOOPHOLE IN EVERY PROPHECY.

Sourcery?

Sorry, forgot to check back!

Your turn pwaites

"It worked like a machine. That was fine except for the occasional people who got caught in the wheel."

I just realized that I won't have consistent computer acess for the next several days. Could someone else take this up?

City Watch

That is a guess but someone needs to make a post or this thread will be lost.

If anyone else posts an answer and pwaites hasn't returned I'll look up the answer and monitor the replies as I am online most of the time.

Which one of the three, Minnie? Or maybe we should put pwaites's question on hold, and go with another quote in the interim?

It was Feet of Clay. Who would like to take this up?

There has suddenly been a great deal of activity from my groups - I suspect that LT hasn't been doing its job of putting recent group posts onto my home page; so I am bumping this thread up as there has been no activity for five days and it has fallen by the wayside.

This one is easy but one of my favourite passages.

"Sodomy non sapiens, " said ***** under his breath.
"What does that mean?"
"Means I'm buggered if I know."

I'll try Mort - it sounds like Albert.

You are absolutely correct. Over to you, edrandrew

Mr Dibbler can even sell sausages to people that have bought then off him before.

Moving Pictures?

Indeed it is - movement returns to this thread and it's ronincats to move next.

"The Disc, as always, gave the impression that the Creator has designed it specifically to be looked at from above. Streamers of cloud in white and sliver stretched away to the Rim, stirred into thousand-mile swirls by the turning of the world."

Sourcery?

No, sorry.

The Colour of Magic?

Still no.

*sigh* The Last Hero

I'm thinking high up but ...

And again, no, but you get points for trying!

Eric?

Yes to Wyrd Sisters--see, persistence pays off!

I had my mind on higher things - but I was running out of ideas.

"I'm a wizard. We're not supposed to be good at machinery.'

This sounds like Rincewind too much to be someone else

No idea which one though so... Eric?

Hogfather?

No and no.

How about Unseen Academicals, then?

Sorry - not Unseen Academicals either

Interesting Times?

Nope

The Last Continent?

Of course. :) Over to you.

And we are moving along to a new thread :)