saraslibrary's 75: Part 3

DVD #24


Filth directed by Jon S. Baird
Tags: drama, humor, scotland, based on book, checked out from work, dvd, R
Rating: 4/5

Oooooo, shiny new thread!

Why, thank you! :) Believe me, it won't stay untainted for long, especially once Stephen shows up. ;)

A new thread just waiting for mischief and mayhem to ensue..... NICE! I will now quickly exit stage left. ;-)

*Licks new thread*

Happy New Thread!

#4: Aww. Well, it was nice seeing you for a bit, Lori! :)

#5: (sprays Stephen with Lysol) Oh, wait. Why'm I trying to get you clean? :P (sprays thread with Lysol)

#6: Thanks, Amber! :)

Book #47


Frog Is Frightened by Max Velthuijs
Tags: fiction, juvenile, picture book, animals, frogs, ducks, pigs, hares, series, frog and friends
Rating: 5/5

Great, now your thread is going to taste bad. *Grumbles*

*Licks Sara's DVD collection*

Yeah, Lysol needs to work on making their sprays a little more palatable. :P Maybe bacon or vodka-flavored.

Nooooo! Not my DVD collection! (sprays them with Lysol) Heck, I think I need to just spray your tongue down, if you're going to lick everything. Open WIDE! (My luck, your germs are probably that 0.1% it doesn't kill.)

Not the DVD collection too! *Licks Sara's CD collection*

Y'know, eventually I'm going to run out of items to lick and I'll have to get more creative. :P

>1 saraslibrary: I love James McAvoy but I'm not sure I'm old enough for that one. :P Also, happy new thread.

#11: Even my Britney Spears' CDs?? You can lick my LT visitors if you run out of items! :) But get near my books, and I get out the scissors. :P

#12: Not old enough? :D Yeah, it's kind of an adult-adult movie. It covers just about everything taboo. And thanks! :)

CD #63


Paramore by Paramore
Tags: pop, checked out from work, cd
Rating: 4/5

You make a good point. I guess I could lick Micky, and since she's Canadian I'm sure she will be really nice and polite about it when she replace the part of her that I'm licking with a frozen metal pole.

>14 saraslibrary: I didn't know they had a third album. I'll have to look for that.

>15 Ape: No, what I will do is scream "Ew", shove your face away from me, and then run away.

Oh, I like a challenge. I've never tried to lick on the run before.

#15: Frozen metal pole--perfect! And since she's such a nice and polite Canadian, she'll not only taste like maple syrup, but she might even apologize for making you lose your tongue. ;)

#16: This was the first CD I've heard by Paramore. They're still pretty new to me.* From what I could find out, I think they actually have 3 previous CDs to the above-mentioned one: All We Know Is Falling, Riot!, and Brand New Eyes. But don't quote me on that just yet. I'm still checking them out online. Have you listened to any of them? Any favorites?

*ETA: I take that back. Apparently, they were on the Twilight soundtrack, so I have heard at least one of their songs. And I just got done putting those 3 CDs on hold, so we'll see how that goes.

I think "Ew"/shove face/run will definitely work, too! ;)

#17: Uh oh. Hop on Mo, Micky! No way he'll mess with you on a moose.

>18 saraslibrary: Riot! is their first album and my favourite of the two complete albums that I've listened to (the other being Brand New Eyes).

And hopping on Mo is an excellent suggestion. *hops on Mo and rides off to the library*

Hopefully I'll get Riot! first, but we'll see. I was going to put holds on some of the compilations and soundtracks they're on (like Transformers and a few of the Now That's What I Call Music CDs), but I hit my limit of holds. Oh well; it'd probably be overkill anyway. Thanks for the recs! :)

(sits in her hippy bean bag and watches the chase develop through her binoculars)

You're trying to escape from me and you ride off to a library? You didn't think this through, did you? :P

I'm thinking she might hide out in the children's or romance section.

DVD #25


Oculus directed by Mike Flanagan
Tags: horror, ghosts, checked out from work, dvd, R
Rating: 3/5

I think both of those sections could give me the wrong idea. :P

And probably put you under librarian scrutiny, too, if you followed Micky to either section. ;)

Nah, you follow me to the library and I'll just get security to kick you out.

But the library closes eventually. Unless you sneak into the ceiling or air ducts somehow. :)

This is starting to sound stalkerish, and we all know that I prefer to be stalked.

*Sigh*

Fine, you win. *Walks away, leaving a trail of sexy pictures of men who Micky thinks is hot*

Um, hello? (waves binoculars) I'm trying to pretend to be stalkerish. :P

Ha! The sexy men trail will totally work.

CD #64


The Rolling Stone Women in Rock Collection by Various Artists
Tags: pop, rock, alt rock, country, folk, r&b, rap, compilation, checked out from work, cd
Rating: 3/5

>29 saraslibrary: Not necessarily guys. I do have access to the internet at home. :P

*Disables Micky's internet, then continues with the sexy man trail*

Sara: Awww, I'm touched. :P

#31: So not just guys do it for you? 0_o

#32: You'll either attract Micky or a bunch of horny gay guys. :P

Yes, we know you're touched. ;)

DVD #26


Dark Touch directed by Marina de Van
Tags: horror, ireland, telekinesis, checked out from work, dvd, NR
Rating: 4/5

It's not what you think! I'm touched, figuratively. *Cough*unforunately*cough*

And please read that closely. I said figuratively, not finger-atively. :P

I read everything too fast, so in Sara Land, you got fingered at the library yesterday. Woo hoo! Go, Stephen! :P

Book #48


Absolute Boyfriend: Volume 3 by Yuu Watase
Tags: fiction, juvenile, romance, sci fi, humor, manga, series, absolute boyfriend, robots, islands, japan
Rating: 4/5

Geez, I need to visit the libraries in Sara Land more often. :P

You definitely should. It's BYOS*; no library card required. :P

*Bring Your Own Straitjacket

DVD #27


The Quiet Ones directed by John Pogue
Tags: horror, ghosts, telekinesis, england, checked out from work, dvd, PG13
Rating: 3/5

DVD #28


Under the Skin directed by Jonathan Glazer
Tags: sci fi, drama, scotland, aliens, based on book, checked out from work, dvd, R
Rating: 3/5

Okay, I'll bring a straightjacket. Are pants required?

Just rubber ones. :P No, on second thought, no pants in crazy Sara Land.

Hurray!

Ummm, I think I'll sit on the border and just watch. With binoculars.

o.o

Ha! Perv! :P If it makes you happier, I can post this:

Book #49


Baby-sitters Little Sister #48: Karen's Two Families by Ann M. Martin
Tags: fiction, juvenile, family life, series, baby-sitters little sister
Rating: 5/5

I leave you two alone for a week...

I know. We need constant supervision. :) But at least we're doing the never nude thing. And we're rockin' the sweatpants under the cutoffs. Aren't you proud? ;) Plus, I read an 80's kids book--nostalgia city!--so doesn't that make me slightly more innocent? Yeah, I grasping at straws. (pushes straight jackets into Stephen's corner)

*Stuffs straws down his pants*

Oy vey!

I'm rocking the blanket toga early this year as we've had a sudden drop in temperature and my apartment building hasn't turned the boilers on yet.

#49: I'm not grabbing at those straws. o_0 Those are yours to keep.

#50: Yeah, I saw that on the news. Wowser! Wanna trade weather? Your freak snow storm for our 26+ºC? I like blanket togas more than I do sweating.

CD #65


Serenade for the Dead by Leæther Strip
Tags: industrial, classical, cd
Rating: 4/5

Book #50


The Arrival by Shaun Tan
Tags: fiction, fantasy, graphic novel, checked out from work
Rating: 3/5

>51 saraslibrary: It's started warming up so you probably won't want to swap. We're supposed to be back to the low to mid 20s by Monday.

>53 saraslibrary: It's a book! :O

Yay! Sorry you didn't enjoy it as much as I did, though.

The book, I mean.

#54: Yuck. Yeah, we're due for 20-30's all this week (80+ F in Yank talk). Hate it. :( Sorry to hear you guys are getting your summer back.

I know! What's a book doing on this thread? :P I haven't been reading at all lately. Mostly just re-reads, which I don't mention here.

#55: Ha! :P (ignoring the innuendo) I've flipped through a few wordless graphic novels before, but I just can't get into them. Maybe if I'd read it at home instead of at work, I may have enjoyed it more. Too much noise/distraction at work. But thank you for the rec! :) I didn't hate it, if that makes you feel better.

CD #66


Razorblade Romance by HIM
Tags: alt rock, cd
Rating: 3/5

I didn't hate it, if that makes you feel better.

It does! Really, it's the best I can hope to hear from a lady after I've...given her a book recommendation. :P

*snort* "I've had worse." Is that a good one? :P

CD #67


Gothik: Music from the Dark Side by Various Artists
Tags: goth, compilation, cd
Rating: 2/5

CD #68


Concrete by Fear Factory
Tags: metal, cd
Rating: 4/5

The next time I give you a book recommendation, I'll try harder to make sure it is more satisfying for you.

*Nods*

LMAO! You are so full of it, but thank you, gentleman sir. ;)



And oddly enough, when I was looking for an appropriate bookgasm pic, I found this one, but click at your own discretion, Micky. It's Beauty & the Beast, but the other B word is thrown in. :/

Book #51


Pete the Cat: Pete at the Beach by James Dean
Tags: fiction, juvenile, picture book, animals, cats, series, pete the cat, beach, surfing, summer
Rating: 5/5

Don't laugh, I'm serious! Just let me consult Google on how to give a lady mind-blowing book recommendations, and be amazed!

Not laughing at all. I'm just spazzed out on illegal drugs and rolling around like a loon. But for the record: I'm not laughing. (serious face)

I'm sorry, but as a gentleman, I only give book recommendations to people who are sober. :P

>63 saraslibrary: I find that one very funny, surprisingly. :)

#67: What? But this is your chance to take advantage of me. Try and ignore the laughing, though, so it doesn't scar your ego. Maybe shove my underwear in my mouth. But please don't let me choke on it. That'd be a hard one to explain to the police.

I'll stop babbling now. Back to work.

#68: Seriously, b*tch? :P So kidding. Please don't smack me around now. But I am surprised you found it funny. Yay for me. I made Micky smile. :)

CD #69


Transgression by Fear Factory
Tags: metal, cd
Rating: 5/5

CD #70


Vault: Greatest Hits 1980-1995 by Def Leppard
Tags: rock, best of, cd
Rating: 4/5

CD #71


The Torture Technique by Sister Machine Gun
Tags: industrial, cd
Rating: 5/5

CD #72


New Old Songs by Limp Bizkit
Tags: metal, rap, dance, cd
Rating: 3/5

It's weird, but "stuffing your underwear in a girl's mouth" didn't come up when I Googled how to give a girl a good book recommendation. :P

You weren't looking hard enough! :P Anyway, it solves two problems: 1) It gets your underwear somewhat cleaner, kind of liking soaking it before washing it, if you've got pesky stains and whatnot; and 2) it gets her to STFU. The same thing can be done to guys. Works both ways. (shrugs)

But giving a girl a good book recommendation is next to impossible. 1) You have to be a mind reader, because no two people read the exact same books, whether they're guys or girls. So I say stalk her first, especially if you happen to see a girl you like in the library or bookstore. Then abduct her. You can keep her at my place until the po-po gives up on you. And then you can read her anything you like. Like the Bible! :) Problem solved. Or you could just ask her what she likes to read and ignore all that crazy Sara talk. :P

And now picture time! I hate the title ("husband" is such a dirty word). It should've been "Help Your Husband Give Himself Head" or "Help Your Husband Give Head." Either way. Sorry, she's not wearing glasses. :*(



ETA: I love this one, too. But methinks it's not wine or V8 she's got in the tub with her. Maybe she's just a heavy bleeder. :D



This one's kind of pretty, though. A little young, but I like. :)

And for me ('cause I'm sick of looking @ half-naked chickies & I loves me some Jake Gyllenhaal):

And because Micky is probably just shaking her head and secretly throwing holy water at me, here ya go, Micky doll:



Naughty, naughty Brit.

Or how about this one, since she loved the bitch word so much before. :P

Glasses would definitely be better. I mean, glasses are made for head anyway, right? :P

I shouldn't be laughing though, I could really use a "How to get ahead in life" manual.

All this reading in the bathtub business just makes me nervous though. Having dropped a book on my own face numerous times, I'm really not fond of the idea of books being held over such a large body of water. I'm pretty sure if I was being tortured for a confession, showing me pictures and videos of that would probably get it out of me.

>76 saraslibrary: *SNORK!* I like that last one quite a bit.

Glasses or those surgical goggles. Maybe just wear a helmet with glasses so nothing gets in your hair either. :P Oh, and nose plugs maybe. And a bib.

You mean this get ahead book? :P There is Girl's Guide to Giving Head, but I think it's poetry. False advertising!

Ha! I remember when you did that, too. :D Yeah, I never read near water--ever. I've even rethought reading on the crapper, because what if it slips between your thighs and--ooops! Poo book now. Straight to the recycle bin with that one.

I'm pretty sure if I was being tortured for a confession, showing me pictures and videos of that would probably get it out of me.

Hmm, now I know how to torture you! Bwahahaha! >:) Personally, all this reading in the tub makes me want to pee. But then I'm always drinking tons of caffeine and water, so I'm always peeing.

#78: Me too! :) I almost want to make a book cover of it and put it on every book I'm reading, so when someone bugs me, all I have to do is raise the book.

Sorry, there's a conversation happening?

*goes back to drooling over Benedict*

(catches Micky's drool then offers to make tea with it)

Nope, no conversation yet. :) Hungry? I'm sure Mo could make us something.

CD #73


Gothic-Industrial: The Remixed Collection by Various Artists
Tags: goth, industrial, compilation, cd
Rating: 4/5

CD #74


Iceolate by Front Line Assembly
Tags: industrial, single, cd
Rating: 3/5

Yeah, so, the poetry book is really confusing. There is no description, and there are so few tags, so is it or isn't it about the things we are insinuating? Clearly I need more information on this "girls giving head" business.

I don't think it's about head. I checked on Amazon, and several reviews mentioned how misleading the title is. Easiest info you'll find is on a porn site. ;) But on LT, you might try these search results--then ILL them at your public library. 0:)

CD #75


Implode by Front Line Assembly
Tags: industrial, cd
Rating: 5/5

Ooooooh, oral sex, I see. I thought it involved decapitation.

:P

Well, it can. If you've ever seen Haute Tension/High Tension (one of my favorite French horror movies), it involves both. Sadly, I wasn't able to find a pic of it on Google. :( Sad times.

Note to self: Don't lose your virginity to a french lady. (And be careful around french-speaking Canadians too, just in case)

Sorry, I'm ignoring this highly disturbing discussion in favour of Benedict. :P

#89: French-Canadian women are the worst. I won't tell you what they make you do to the wildlife before beheading you. Yes, Stephen, remain a virgin forever. :P

#90: Even this pic of him? Sorry, I love it; had to post it. :P

CD #76


New Dark Noise: The Darkwave Dance Floor Killer No Filler by Various Artists
Tags: goth, industrial, compilation, cd
Rating: 3/5

CD #77


Splendor Solis by The Tea Party
Tags: alt rock, cd
Rating: 3/5

>91 saraslibrary: That interview is very funny. :)

I didn't get to see all of it, but I think you linked to it once, so I was able to see the funnier bits. Thank you! :) He does have a great sense of humor. I can see why so many girls (and guys) like him.

CD #78


Angels With Dirty Faces by Tricky
Tags: trip hop, cd
Rating: 3/5

99: Really? I don't know, but "Benedict" doesn't sound very innocent to me either. For example, "I have enjoyed my conversations with Micky in the past, especially when they have Benedict."

*Snickers*

>97 Ape: You're just jealous of my undying love for Benedict. :P

I don't mind at all! In fact, whenever I've thought about you, it always has Benedict.

*More childish snickers*

Double snickers if you say his full name. His parents were pervs. Properly secretive English pervs, of course. But Benedick Cumbersnatch! Come on! (sticks soap in mouth)

DVD #29


Unborn But Forgotten = Hayanbang directed by Chang-jae Lim
Tags: horror, foreign, ghosts, pregnancy, computers, dvd, R
Rating: 3/5

Book #52


Maximum Ride: Volume 2 by James Patterson & NaRae Lee
Tags: fiction, juvenile, manga, series, maximum ride, sci fi, new york, based on book
Rating: 4/5

CD #79


The Whip by Various Artists
Tags: goth, compilation, cd
Rating: 3/5

>100 saraslibrary: You better have that soap in there a while.

>99 Ape: And when Sara's done you get the soap in your mouth.

You want me to put Sara's soap box in my mouth?

XD See? Micky's worse than both of us combined! Good one, Micky. ;)

Book #53


Tangled: Kingdom of Color by Melissa Lagonegro
Tags: fiction, juvenile, fantasy, fairy tales, animals, horses, rabbits, chameleons, princesses, picture book, novelization, series, tangled
Rating: 4/5

DVD #30


Sitcom directed by François Ozon
Tags: drama, humor, foreign, france, incest, rats, gay, bdsm, suicide, physically handicapped, dvd, NR
Rating: 4/5

CD #80


Mysterious Encounters: A Cleopatra Compilation of Gothic, Industrial, & Alternative Sounds from the Underground by Various Artists
Tags: industrial, goth, compilation, cd
Rating: 4/5

You guys made soap dirty. So many things are wrong with that.

How is that possible? Soap makes things clean. You're confusing me now, Micky.



Be glad I didn't post the genitalia-shaped soap. Or the fake fetus in a bar of soap. But I will post this one! So many gross things could go on with this hand of soap. (perverted mind overblowing itself)

>111 saraslibrary: Not clicking. :P

It's completely innocent, Micky. It's just a bar of soap shaped like a hand. It's only dirty in Sara's mind. ...okay okay, and mine too. :P

I wonder if that hand comes in multiple...uhhhh, positions. :P

#112: No need. I think Stephen got the right dirty image in your head now. >:)

#113: Completely innocent! Amputated hands in the bathroom are totally normal and nonsexual. You all are just pervs. :P

It could if it had suction cups on the base of the wrist. Or if you removed some of the fingers. Hmm, money could made on this somehow. I'm just too lazy to do it. ;)

CD #81


Facets of Blue by Gitane Demone
Tags: goth, cd
Rating: 3/5

CD #82


We Are Always Searching by I Am Ghost
Tags: goth, cd
Rating: 4/5

CD #83


The Three Calamities by Switchblade Symphony
Tags: goth, cd
Rating: 4/5

Suction cups!? You sure know the way to a guy's heart. :P

And it's not with a knife? :P

Book #54


Horrid Henry and the Zombie Vampire by Francesca Simon
Tags: fiction, juvenile, series, horrid henry, humor, short stories, fairies, museums, siblings
Rating: 5/5

Ummmmm, no, I don't think so.

With a spoon?

CD #84


Excelsis: A Dark Noel by Various Artists
Tags: goth, christmas, compilation, cd
Rating: 2/5

There can certainly be some spooning involved.

>122 saraslibrary: Excellent reference.

#124: Spooning with a dead guy. Yeeahhh, no thanks. ;)

#125: Thanks! :) I watched Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves one too many times as a kid.

>126 saraslibrary: There are many faults in that movie. Alan Rickman is never one of them.

:D Agreed!

DVD #31


Petals on the Wind directed by Karen Moncrieff
Tags: drama, series, dollanganger, virginia, south carolina, new york, california, based on book, incest, ballet, revenge, suicide, dvd, NR
Rating: 4/5

CD #85


In Your Dreams by Stevie Nicks
Tags: rock, checked out from work, cd
Rating: 4/5

Book #55


Dead@17: The Complete First Series by Josh Howard
Tags: fiction, juvenile, graphic novel, horror, zombies, series, dead@17
Rating: 4/5

DVD #32


Enemy directed by Denis Villeneuve
Tags: suspense, spiders, toronto, ontario, canada, based on book, checked out from work, dvd, R
Rating: 3/5

CD #86


Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness by Smashing Pumpkins
Tags: alt rock, best of, cd
Rating: 2/5

CD #87


The Origin of the Feces by Type O Negative
Tags: metal, live, cd
Rating: 4/5

CD #88


Parklife by Blur
Tags: pop, rock, cd
Rating: 3/5

DVD #33


Eden Lake directed by James Watkins
Tags: horror, england, camping, woods, dvd, R
Rating: 4/5

DVD #34


A Serbian Film = Srpski Film directed by Srdjan Spasojevic
Tags: horror, foreign, serbia, rape, abuse, sex, bdsm, NC17, dvd
Rating: 5/5

132: Giant spiders...in Canada! Does that mean they are super polite when they eat you?

But of course! :P Here's one of many spider pics from the movie. I'm not afraid of spiders (in fact, I liberated two from my bathtub this morning--spider party in Sara's tub--woohoo! ;)

Quite possibly a Canadian spider:



Except I doubt they'd say bitch.

This one I love. :D But what does it say about me that I don't scream when I see spiders? Hmm.... (scratches head)

CD #89


Archetype by Fear Factory
Tags: metal, cd
Rating: 5/5

Spiders facinate me...when they are outside. However, I find them terribly menacing when they are IN MY HOUSE and happily eradicate them with any death-spray I have at hand.

I feel the same way about ladies...errrr, ladybugs. Yes, ladybugs. *ahem*

This is my favourite of the misunderstood spider memes:

>138 Ape: and >139 saraslibrary: - Hey, we do have big 'ish' spiders here, or at least spiders one should be worried about being bitten by. Of course, I see them using the "B" word and not making any mention of "Dear God" when I discover and deal with them. :-)

>142 MickyFine: - That is funny!

#141: Use spray on a ladybug (other than perfume--and not in the eye) and you'll end up in jail with a restraining order. Just saying. :P Besides, what's so scary about spiders anyway? They are seriously chickenshit little critters. The only time I was afraid of them was when I was hyper-aware of my vagina and was certain all spiders wanted to crawl into it and feast and lay their eggs in me. Freud would've had a hay-day with that one.

lmao @ 142. Love it! :) You probably don't want to hear this, but I sometimes let them crash under my covers where my cats can't find them. Not that my cats would ever kill a spider. They're too domesticated.

#143: Oh, yeah, getting bitten by poisonous spiders...not so fun. :) lol-ing at your choice of names for them. ;) Kind of reminds me of this petting a spider with my foot pic.

Oh, oh! And I just found this one for Stephen, our Zombie King. ;)

Book #56


Burnout by Rebecca Donner
Tags: fiction, juvenile, graphic novel, oregon, family life, terrorism, alcoholism, incest
Rating: 4/5

CD #90


Blowback by Tricky
Tags: trip hop, cd
Rating: 5/5

I think the reason why people hate spiders (and cockroaches) is because of how fast the skitter. Most insects are stupidly slow, but spiders dart about at a frightening pace!

Oh, and I suppose there is that whole evolutionary biology thing. Snakes and spiders are incredibly poisonous, and the early humans who weren't scared of them gotten bitten and died of poison, the ones who were terrified lived longer and reproduced more, apparently instilling a natural instinct to be afraid of spiders and snakes.

Or so evolutionary biologists would have you believe. I'm not sure how that explains how someone can be afraid of clowns. :P

The zombie apocalypse pic is quite funny. Personally, although zombies are scarier, I still think I'd rather see a zombie apocalypse instead of a spider apocalypse. *Shudders*

Yeah, the fast skittering I can understand. But even size does matter sometimes, fast or slow.



Your evolutionary theory is interesting, though. But you're right--what about clowns? Or people in general? Those things will kill us more than spiders and snakes combined.

Oh, spider apocalypse! (rubs her hands together in excitement) You know I'll be behind that one, don't you, right?

>148 saraslibrary: - Okay, I seriously was not ready for that spider waking across my screen. Nice!

:D Sorry. I was trying to find a speed-freak of a spider to put on here, but I couldn't find one. Sad, huh? :P

CD #91


Digital Empire 2: The Aftermath by Various Artists
Tags: dance, compilation, series, digital empire, cd
Rating: 5/5

CD #92


Far Beyond Driven by Pantera
Tags: metal, cd
Rating: 4/5

Book #57


Wiley & Grampa's Creature Features #2: Grampa's Zombie BBQ by Kirk Scroggs
Tags: fiction, juvenile, horror, humor, series, wiley and grampa's creature features, zombies, parties
Rating: 5/5

I think a lot of spider fear is derived from people being incapable of developing their own opinions about things. Lots of people think spiders are scary, so other people think they should be scared too.

It's like how every person thinks bacon is the best food ever right now. It's a trend, and everyone loves it because everyone else loves it. Spiders are probably the same way. I know my mom used to have no fear of spiders whatsoever, and would call people "whimpy" when they were afraid of spiders, but my sister has a severe aversion to spiders. Several years later, after raising a child who screamed at spiders every time she saw one, my mom started doing it too. *Rolls eyes*

Such is human nature, I suppose. We're pack animals, our highly-developed brain just means we do it in a slightly more complex way.

Agreed: people are stupid. ;) And it probably doesn't help that there are movies like Arachnophobia out there. And you're doubly right about people freaking out over the same things (spiders, misc. animals like dogs or possums, flying--safer than driving!--the dark, yadda yadda yadda). But then I guess I shouldn't make fun of their fears, 'cause I'm a social phobe, and I'm sure my fear makes other people laugh. But I will laugh at chrometophobes. Fear of money? Ack, you're hopeless. Give it me then. :P

And backing up to your mom and sis, do you think if you covered the spiders in bacon they'd get over their fear? (Btw, bacon sucks donkey nuts. Just saying.)

CD #93


Industrial Revolution: Second Edition by Various Artists
Tags: industrial, compilation, cd
Rating: 3/5

I agree, a more analytical person might realize that the most dangerous thing they do in their lives is drive on a highway every single day on their way to work, but because that is not a common fear, people aren't afraid of it, despite the obvious danger. Meanwhile they freak out over a mouse in the kitchen. *Sigh*

Bacon is awesome, but if I were to list the best foods ever, I don't think it would make the top 10. Maybe not even the top 20. It's delicious and you can eat it with pretty much everything, but anything you put it in I'd rather have something. It's good on a cheeseburger, but I'll take a swiss and shroom burger please. It's good in a salad, but I'll take grilled chicken thanks. Sure, you can put it in mac and cheese, but Broccoli would be better. A loaded potato is pretty good with cheddar and bacon...but I like sour cream better. Etc etc.

Also, I realize talking about this is probably like you talking about sex on my thread, so I'm going to stop now. :P

Yeah, I try not to think of all those high probabilities of getting hurt in the house either (the kitchen, bathroom, stairs, etc). But I think no matter how analytical someone is, people have some sort of fear that is silly from an outsider's perspective. You're right. No, wait. Wrong, wrong. Why am I agreeing with you? :P (I loves mice, so the only squealing done by me is, "OMG! Minnie*, I love you and want to keep you forever and ever!")

*I was going to say Mickey, but then I thought Micky might think that's a bit odd. :)

I used to eat soy bacon bits in my salad, but strangely, they've stopped making them, so I kind of know what you mean about bacon tastes good with anything. And some vegan bacon is ok. Btw, did I tell you I'm eating eggs now? As of September, I think. We have pet chickens, so I'm eating those; nothing store-bought. So technically, I'm a hypocrite vegetarian for now. ;)

:D Maybe we can meet in the middle--talk about sex with bacon? o_0 Or maybe not.

CD #94


Saw VI Soundtrack by Various Artists
Tags: metal, soundtrack, series, saw, checked out from work, cd
Rating: 3/5

CD #95


Addictions: Volume 1 by Robert Palmer
Tags: pop, best of, series, addictions, cd
Rating: 3/5

Eggs are delicious. Are you allowed to eat the chicken if it dies of natural causes? Like a blow to the head? :P

I don't think you are a hypocrite, though. Now, if you decide to eat your eggs with a side of sausage...that may be crossing the line.

I'm sure my social phobia is absurd to most people, so I agree it is unfair to judge other's by their phobias, however mine is better because PEOPLE, unlike most spiders and snakes, are obviously horrendously evil things wrought with danger and potential death.

Hey, look, I'm not one to judge, so if bacon is involved in meeting in the middle with you, I'm totally down with it. :P

Ironically, I just looked at the Member Giveaway books and there is one called "Veganish." Sounds like you! :P

>161 Ape:: I'm glad you like their taste. XP I'm still drowning them in vegan mayo, ketchup, and mustard. As for eating the chicken...uh, no. In both senses. Even my mom, whose a carnivore, refuses to kill them for food. So, sorry to get your hopes up, Stephen. :P

What about human sausage? Would that still make me a vegan?

Aptly put! I'm so gonna put "people are horrendously evil things wrought with danger and potential death" and wear it to work one day. Let's just see if I stay employed by the end of the day. ;)

There are so many sexual innuendos in that bacon sentence, I'm not sure how to respond. I was going to post a chick covered in bacon, but our filters must be down at work, because I saw so many dicks, a-holes, and girl junk, that I had to quickly close the browser. o_0 Anywho, enjoy your pig flesh:



>162 Ape:: Cool, thanks! :) I'll have to see if we have that at work. I'm not much into cooking, but I'll look into it.

ETA: We don't have it, so I wanted to ILL it, but I've already maxed my 3 limit. :( Maybe next time.

Book #58


Kids Are Weird: And Other Observations from Parenthood by Jeffrey Brown
Tags: fiction, humor, graphic novel, family life, checked out from work
Rating: 4/5

I think if you drown chicken in vegan mayo, ketchup, and mustard it totally still counts as vegan!!

I'm not sure if you would like the book exactly, just that the title fits your current circumstance. :P

Mmmmmm, pig flesh. I prefer BBQ pulled pork, however. *Slurp*

For some reason (probably because it's before noon, and my brain doesn't work until the evening), I thought you meant literally drowning chicken--holding them under--in a vat of mayo, ketchup, and mustard. XP Bad images. After work, I'm going home and petting my chickens...though they'll probably still peck me like I'm the one who's dinner. :/

Yeah, there's a book with a similar title, Veganist; that's probably why they went with Veganish: to grab some of that book's popularity.

Pulled pork sounds worse than pig flesh. XP Ick, you and your weird carnivore words.

Book #59


Marvin Redpost #1: Kidnapped at Birth? by Louis Sachar
Tags: fiction, juvenile, humor, family life, series, marvin redpost, washington dc
Rating: 5/5

CD #96


Sounds of Horror by Various Artists
Tags: classical, halloween, cd
Rating: 3/5

Hey, after a long day of hard work, a lady deserves to go home and pet her chickens.

(If there is sexual innuendo there, I don't get it)

Riiight. So women pet ours while you guys choke yours. Got it. No internet for you for a week. :P

DVDs #35 & #36


Evil Remains (aka Trespassing) directed by James Merendino and Nature's Grave (aka Long Weekend) directed by Jamie Blanks
Tags: horror, anthology, new orleans, louisiana, australia, animals, dogs, eagles, kangaroos, snakes, owls, seals, manatees, nature, dvd, R
Rating: 3/5 (both)

CD #97


Superstarved by Gravity Kills
Tags: industrial, cd
Rating: 4/5

You said it, not me. I'm totally innocent here.

Suuure. As innocent as a crack whore wearing a nun outfit. Speaking of which, are you planning on dressing up for Halloween? (Please, oh, please say you'll be a nun. :D )

Book #60


Black Metal: Volume 1 by Rick Spears & Chuck BB
Tags: fiction, juvenile, horror, series, black metal, graphic novel, demons, monsters, hell, twins, rock bands, los angeles, california
Rating: 4/5

CD #98


Maxinquaye by Tricky
Tags: trip hop, cd
Rating: 4/5

CD #99


Community Service by The Crystal Method
Tags: dance, compilation, series, community service, cd
Rating: 5/5

Well, considering the fact that I don't exactly go out in public very often, I don't really have any reason to dress up. If I did dress up, though, it would totally (not) be a nun. :P

I'm afraid to ask what you'd dress up as. (imagines Stephen as an ape furry) But you don't have to go anywhere to dress up. *snickering* I was going to post a different image, but I found this while looking for people dressing up and staying at home. ;)

CD #100


Debut by Björk
Tags: trip hop, cd
Rating: 4/5

I wouldn't be caught dead in those colors! :P

Well, that could be arranged. Oh wait. You said "wouldn't." Never mind. 0:) Yes, hideous, slutty outfit. And is that thing even considered a hat or a turban? o_0

I don't know, but as much as I would like it to be real the picture is photoshopped.

How about you, will you be dressing up for Halloween?

No, it's on the internet. It must be real! ;) *secretly wants to sneak into a zoo and dress up the animals* Hmm, second thought: PETA's probably skin me alive for that. I'll dress my critters up instead. :)

Naw, I'm too old to dress up for Halloween. If I were working on Halloween, then maybe, but I thankfully have that day off. I'll just walk around my neighborhood in all black, with hoodie and black face paint, and see how long before the police pick me up. ;)

CD #101


Foundation Stones by Rosetta Stone
Tags: goth, live, cd
Rating: 2/5

I'll do the same! Only I'll drive a van and use it to give kids Halloween candy. *High fives*

*high five* Score! We'll be in jail probably about the same time. Right on! :D

We can totally break out together! I'll work on chiseling a hole in the wall, you take your clothes off and starting making a rope. (Shhhh, it's a good plan, I swear.)

And the rope is...to hang ourselves with? Kinky freak. :P

Book #61


Evil's Return: Volume 1 by Jong-Kyu Lee
Tags: fiction, juvenile, horror, manga, demons, series, evil's return
Rating: 3/5

CD #102


The Tyranny of Inaction by Rosetta Stone
Tags: goth, cd
Rating: 5/5

Yep, kinky, that's me! Now, off with the pants. :P

You off with the pants? Or me off with the pants? (thinks Stephen has turned into the Red Queen)

I don't even want to know what you two are talking about..... Hi Sara!

I'm just trying to get Sara naked. I have heard it is much more difficult when everyone is sober, sadly.

>194 lkernagh: I don't think we even know what we're talking about. That's what makes it so much fun. Hi Lori! :)

>195 Ape: Well, we could get you drunk, but that still won't get me naked. You could just throw some gasoline and a match on me and go from there....

Hmmmm, this is like having a bag of potato chips and suggesting we set the bag on fire to get to them. Surely there is a better way. :P

Hit it with a crowbar? Like a piñata. Yeah, that should work! :P

CD #103


Hearts of Gold: The Pop Collection by Various Artists
Tags: pop, rock, dance, compilation, checked out from work, cd
Rating: 4/5

I don't have a crowbar! :( All I have is, ummmm, *Searches about* oh, a screwdriver?

*Looks at potato chip bag* But, um, I don't know how to use it... :P

Close your eyes (potato shards can blind, srsly!) and stab wildly at the potato chip bag. You'll get it open somehow. Hmm, why does this remind me of dogs humping? They just go at it and maybe, if they're lucky, sex happens. And if it's the right end and right equipment. And now I've got the munchies for potato chips.

Book #62


Cat Getting Out of a Bag and Other Observations by Jeffrey Brown
Tags: fiction, humor, graphic novel, animals, cats, checked out from work
Rating: 4/5

Haha! You mean your descriptions of dog sex isn't true for teenage boys/inexperienced men as well???

Oh, I'm sure teenage boys and inexperienced men like getting it on, but I haven't watched enough gay porn to compare it to dog sex. :P

DVD #37


Joe's Apartment directed by John Payson
Tags: humor, fantasy, musical, insects, cockroaches, new york, dvd, R
Rating: 3/5

Book #63


Evil's Return: Volume 2 by Jong-Kyu Lee
Tags: fiction, juvenile, horror, manga, demons, series, evil's return
Rating: 3/5

Book #64


Evil's Return: Volume 3 by Jong-Kyu Lee
Tags: fiction, juvenile, horror, manga, demons, series, evil's return
Rating: 3/5

Book #65


Evil's Return: Volume 4 by Jong-Kyu Lee
Tags: fiction, juvenile, horror, manga, demons, series, evil's return
Rating: 3/5

Book #66


Julian Rodriguez: Episode One: Trash Crisis on Earth by Alexander Stadler
Tags: fiction, juvenile, sci fi, aliens, family life, humor, graphic novel
Rating: 5/5

Book #67


One Kitten for Kim by Adelaide Holl
Tags: fiction, juvenile, picture book, animals, cats, fish, parrots, dogs, roosters, chickens, chameleons
Rating: 5/5

Shame on you! You work in a library, it is your job to know EVERYTHING. I'm afraid you are going to have to go watch gay porn right this instant, before your co-workers find out! :o

What if I just watch two male dogs do it? That's about the same thing, right? Ok, fine, fine.

*googles gay porn, watches for 10 seconds before sirens go off and I'm immediately fired and ejected from the building*

*snort* I said ejected.

Actually, I find it pretty damn ironic and funny that I work in a library. I love books, but I barely passed high school, and I haven't a clue how the library operates. So, sure, I know EVERYTHING about nothing. How's that? :P

It's better to know everything about nothing than nothing about everything. :)

Wait. Isn't that the same thing?

I don't know, you're the expert here. I don't know anything about some things.

You are too profound for me, mister. I'm the expert in weirdness, sure. I'll take that crown. :)

I never thought being too profound for a lady would ever be a problem I would have to face. It's okay though, I think they have lubrication for this sort of thing.

I would contest that designation, but I guess I can let you be Queen of Weirdness and I'll take the Awkward throne. *Nods*

You're going to lube my brain? 0_o

You get a throne and I only get a crown? What's wrong with that picture? Can I at least have a pitchfork or some kind of stabby thing? Dildo on a stick maybe?

You are the Queen, so you can do whatever you like! We can be allies, and the Lands of Weirdness and Awkward will rule the world! We'll open up trade routes in our most sensitive territories, and I'll try to keep my soldiers out of your nether regions. It'll be great! :P

Sounds like a plan! :) But yeah, you might want to warn your "soldiers" of my moat of acid that'll fry just about all of them.

Book #68


No Lifeguard on Duty: The Accidental Life of the World's First Supermodel by Janice Dickinson
Tags: nonfiction, autobiography, models, drug abuse, new york, paris, france, florida, california
Rating: 4/5

*Note to soldiers, Sara has a moat of acid in her nether regions, so the Canal may be off limits. She didn't tell me this directly, but I think when you invade, she wants you to come in the mouth of the Salivary river.*

*Snickers immaturely*

*mock stern face* Nose in the corner, mister. And stick some soap in that mouth.

Kidding! That was hilarious.

Yeah, I make geography fun. :P

Indeed you do. You should be a sex ed/geography teacher. Combine the two, and kids'll remember the world better. Like how Norway, Sweden, and Finland look like male genitalia...getting head by a slug. o_0

That can NOT be sanitary (for the slug).

Probably not. Scandinavia could always just wear a condom. And for some reason, the book 50 Ways to Kill a Slug automatically popped into my head. But killing a slug while it's, um, busy would probably freak some guys out.

(searching LT) Who knew there was a book called The Sex Life of Slugs? Must be fascinating. Not. (hides the fact that she owns and has read The Secret Sex Lives of Animals)

Sadly, both of those last 2 books sound fascinating to me. :P

The Secret Sex Lives of Animals is pretty fascinating; you'd like it. :) I have no clue about The Sex of Slugs, but I'm guessing there's a great deal of goo.

Book #69


The Case of the Scaredy Cats by Crosby Bonsall
Tags: fiction, juvenile, suspense, picture book, clubs, winter, friendship, series, the case of...
Rating: 4/5

Yeah, I'm guessing slugs don't need lubrication.

10 points to anyone who can find a sexual lubricant with "Slug" in the title. :P

Lucky so-and-so's.

I did a quick google of sexual slug lubricants and nada. :( For some *strange* reason, I don't think they'd be able to market that one very well.

However, I did have the *ahem* pleasure of looking at some slugs getting it on. Poor slugs. No privacy whatsoever. No pay either. Anyway, let's just say watching them have sex is about as appetizing as this:

CD #104


Shrieks, Laments, & Anguished Cries: Deluxe Edition by Razed in Black
Tags: industrial, cd
Rating: 5/5

Ewwwwwww, mustard!

Kidding, mustard is delicious! I thought that was a severely burnt hot dog at first. It looks quite unappealing either way.

Are you addicted to slug porn now? Was there a facial at the end? :P

I love mustard too! :) I think it's the vinegar or something. Maybe crack they secretly put in it.

Yeah, a burnt hot dog with two little feelers on one tip. Or it could be a penis or dildo. Either way, I'm not eating it. XP

No, I'm unfortunately googling yiffy porn at work. The lowest of the lows. It's quite confusing to me. As for slug facials, how could there not be spunk of both of them? It's like they come (no pun intended) out of their bodies. It's super freaky. Like so. I'm not sick enough to YouTube it. It'd probably be hella slow anyway, like watching old-timers doing it.

Um, yeah, that's very....errrr, slimy. o.o

Yeah, they should replace regular spider webs in haunted houses with mating slugs. That would freak people out more. >:) Yum, slug sex juice in your hair. Slug facial even! Ha! I'm giving myself gross ideas for a haunted house now....

Note to self: Don't go to Sara's haunted house.

Unless you're abducted and dragged to it. You can be part of the haunted house, kind of like Waxwork. Yikes, I'm showing my age again. Never mind. :)

CD #105


The Hits by Billy Joel
Tags: pop, best of, checked out from work, cd
Rating: 3/5

Am I going to have to hide under my bed again?

I finally found you again. :) I'm sure I found you once but I must not have starred you. Anyways, happy reading.

>241 Ape: Again? I don't think I was able to get a group of ladies together to get you out the first time. *pouts* But if you must hide, go ahead. I'll figure out this pulley thing myself. So much rope.

>242 Kassilem: Yay! I hate it when I'm lost. ;) No worries, and thanks! :) I've been pretty bad at reading. But I went to a library book sale today, and they had a ton of Halloween books, so hopefully I'll pad up my numbers in the next week or two.

>241 Ape: - Awe, Stephen. Come out from under the bed. Sara just wants to play. Really. ;-)

Exactly! What Lori said. *hides the cat o' nine tails in Lori's pocket and dumps a pile of chains down into the mysterious hole in Stephen's floor before slamming the door shut and sitting on it...which possibly leads to Sara's dungeon o_0 * Sleep tight, Stephy-winky. ;)

Hello Sara!

Oh, I know Sara just wants to play, which is exactly what I'm so afraid of. I wouldn't generally consider myself fragile, but Sara can totally break me. :P

Good point.

Sara, you have play nicely with your friends.

...... and how did this thing get in my pocket?

>246 Whisper1: Hi Linda! :) Long time no see!

>247 Ape: Aawww, you just know how to flatter a girl, don't you? ;) I'll be more gentle, I promise. (dons silk gloves instead of metal-studded spanking gloves)

>248 lkernagh: I know! How about food. People like sugary snacks, right? 0:)



How did that whip get there. Tsk tsk. Naughty, Lori. :P

Book #70


Death By Laughter by Harry Bliss
Tags: fiction, humor, comics, death
Rating: 4/5

Book #71


Tickle's Tale by Stephen Cosgrove
Tags: fiction, juvenile, picture book, series, serendipity, animals, cats, wizards, magic
Rating: 5/5

Ooops. I went over 250 messages. Shackle me up. :P

249: That rusty knife in your hand isn't going to hurt any less wearing silk gloves. :P

Okay, onto the new thread.

I'll be super nice and give you a pain injection shot beforehand. 0:)

Yes, what're you doing still lurking on this old thread. :P