I'm Dancing as Fast as I Can

Mental Illness

Barbara Gordon's groundbreaking memoir tells the extraordinary story of a woman who has it all, or thinks she does-a career as an Emmy-award-winning documentary producer, a man she loves, a world of friends, and a beautiful apartment in Manhattan. But beneath the facade, Barbara's life is spinning out of control. In spite of the pills prescribed by her doctor, a nameless terror disrupting her daily life intensifies until she is besieged by crippling anxiety attacks. A formerly strong, independent, successful woman, Barbara's life becomes a nightmare of paralysis and fear. When Barbara finds herself unable to leave her apartment or walk the streets of New York alone, she decides to take charge of her life. She doesn't want show more pills, she wants answers. Instead of ending her fears, quitting the medicine leads to the unraveling of what she thought was her perfect life, and Barbara becomes a casualty of a flawed and inept mental health system. Barbara had often spoken for the voiceless in her films, but she suddenly finds herself powerless, without a voice of her own. Though she feels frightened and misunderstood, the tenderness and love of another young patient, Jim, helps Barbara rediscover her voice and her identity. show less

Anyone who thinks that becoming addicted to Valium can't happen to them should read this book. Brutally honest it follows Barbara Gordon, a successful award winning documentary film maker, through her addiction to Valium and her painful struggle to get off. This is a great read. I won this from Goodreads.

A rather pathetic memoir of a privileged woman refusing to take responsibility for her own life and her dependence on psychiatric malpractice. An easy read because one can skip pages without losing anything meaningful.

This memoir chronicles a harrowing period in producer and documentary film maker Barbara Gordon's life. She unflinchingly describes her anxiety attacks, Valium addiction, abusive relationship and hospitalizations. Well written and ultimately uplifting.

Barbara's story is fascinating. I found I couldn't put the book down.

Barbara Gordon, a documentary producer finds herself addicted to Valium. The decision to just stop taking them cold turkey, causes such nuerosis in Barbara's mind. To watch the downfall of her entire life happen in a few short weeks, and then the many years it takes to rebuild everything. The woman is strong.

This is a book about addiction. I think the book is more about mental illness than substance abuse. The author goes through many things, she is "lost to self". She is put into several mental institutions to find herself and to get over her addiction to Valium. It is a thought-provoking book that will stay with you long after you read it. I recommend this book to anyone with mental illness.

In her memoir Barbara Gordon presents an engaging story of her fight against mental illness. Her story is proof that we are all just a few pills away from our own fight.